“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

#1 Jan 18, 2014
DEAR ABBY: Our neighbors of 14 years watch our dog while we are away, which is quite often. They have free access to our home with the key we have given them.

Two months ago, the husband hit on me, really pushing the issue for me to have sex with him. Then he apologized like it was nothing. I was upset, scared, shocked and told my husband because I was concerned. My husband was not happy about it.

We have not been able to look at him or his wife (my friend) since then. We are all middle-aged. Should I tell her why we have been absent, or can you help me figure out what to do?-- BADLY IN NEED OF ADVICE

DEAR BADLY IN NEED: Make other plans for your dog when you travel, change the locks on your doors, and if your friend asks why you have been "absent," tell her why. She may not like to hear it, but she should know that if your friendship with her is going to continue, it will have to be without her husband being included.(She should have herself checked for STDs in case her husband has managed to get lucky with a neighbor who was willing.)

DEAR ABBY: I'm 31 and have been married to my husband for 2 1/2 years. He wants a baby in the worst way. I don't, and I have been clear about it.

Abby, my husband helps with nothing. I'm constantly cleaning, doing the laundry and cooking meals. That's OK, but I'd like some help. I have asked him many times to do things before football comes on or to take a break from Netflix and get something done. It never happens. I have been nice about it, and I have been angry.

We agreed to buy a bigger house and then have a baby, but at this rate, I already have one -- my husband! Is there any hope?-- MAMA ALREADY

DEAR MAMA ALREADY: No, I don't think so. You married a man who is lazy, or passive aggressive and angry at your refusal to have a baby, or has been so spoiled by his mother that he thinks this is a normal way to live. Counseling might help you get through to him, but I wouldn't bet on it.

DEAR ABBY: I am 10 years old and I have a major boy problem. My ex (Bob) broke up with me, and I felt funny around him and a little mad. So I kind of moved on. I went to my crush who had previously asked me out, and I said yes. Now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do. I asked my mom and didn't like the answer, so now I'm asking you.-- CONFUSED GIRL IN ARKANSAS

DEAR CONFUSED GIRL: I don't know what your mother told you, but here's my advice: At 10, you're too young to be in an exclusive relationship with anyone. Because you regret saying yes to your crush, tell him your mother disapproves and you cannot go against her wishes.

DEAR ABBY: Can you please tell me the proper way to eat a taco salad? Do you crunch up the taco bowl, eat everything out of it and then eat the taco bowl? I asked my husband, and he said to ask you.-- TRACI IN AMSTERDAM, N.Y.

DEAR TRACI: There are no rules of etiquette governing how to eat a taco salad. However, when I order one, I usually eat the contents of the bowl, then chip off pieces of the tortilla if I still have enough room to nibble. I have also seen diners order the salad and ask that it be served on a salad plate ("Hold the taco!") in order to save a few calories.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

#2 Jan 18, 2014
1- It took him 14 years to make a pass at you? Hell, I just got new neighbors last month and I've already hit on the pregnant wife. Unless you plan on moving, they're still gonna be your neighbors. I say you just put this behind you and continue as is.

2- This attitude and behavior must not have been present during dating.

3- Buy a sexy party dress and hit the clubs.

4- Just mash the whole thing together with your fork.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#3 Jan 18, 2014
LW1: I suppose women are different than men, but I don't let someone hitting on me traumatize me. I would just let it go and if it happens again, read him the riot act. It's okay to be assertive.

LW2: I don't understand how, if it is only two of you that you are CONSTANTLY cleaning and doing laundry? How much mess can 2 adults possibly make? Our house would be immaculate without kids and we'd probably have at most 6 loads of laundry a week. He sounds lazy and you sound like a drama queen.

LW3: Go play with pretty ponies.

LW4: I don't eat those, but if I did, I would eat the contents and as the level of the contents went down, I would break off parts of the shell and eat it with the contents.
boundary painter

Waco, TX

#4 Jan 18, 2014
Even if people in Arkansas get "hitched" early, ten is awfully young for
LW3 to be dating and to have an "ex" boyfirend.( I bet this is a fake letter from the University of Arkansas.)

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#5 Jan 18, 2014
L1 You told your husband right away. That's good.
There is now a 2 month gap since you have gotten together with people you were previously close to. The husband knows why.

If you really like the wife, have lunch with her. If she asks, tell her. If she doesn't, let that sleeping dog lay/lie. I will bet the wife ha said something casual to her husband who spun teh story that you put the make on him and he turned you down

Either it was an aberration or she has had to deal with his behavior before.

Find another dog sitter.

L2 DON"T BREED. Whether you stay with this guy or not is up to you, but holding out children as a reward for vacuuming or withholding them because he watches TV football is ALL WRONG.

Fwiw, you don't sound like someone I want to hang out with.

L3 Fake. No 10 year old calls an old crush her ex.

L4 Like Sub said
Cass

Claremont, CA

#6 Jan 18, 2014
LW1 - Awkward. Find a good kennel for your dog when you travel.

LW2 - Yes, there is hope, but what your course of action depends on whether you work outside the home or not. If you don't, you need a major attitude adjustment with respect to chores, but not necessarily kids. If you don't have a housewife, it is your job to do the laundry, cleaning, cooking, etc.

If you do have a full-time job, then here is what you need to do. First, stop doing his laundry. If he runs out of socks and underwear, he'll either start doing it himself (thus, lessening your burden) or he can wear dirty stuff over and over. His choice. Second, stop cooking. When you get home from work, if you are hungry, fix yourself a salad and a sandwich. He can do his own if he is hungry. Third, do not even think about going on a cleaning strike. If you are a neat person, it'll drive YOU nuts to live in a filthy house, but will have no effect on hubby whatsoever. But if you find that you have to pick up after him, feel free to toss the stuff you find left where it does not belong (i.e. dirty socks on the floor? Ask him to pick them up. If he doesn't, pick them up yourself and toss them.). Fourth, see if you can live that way. If you can't, it will be time to visit a divorce attorney.

Oh, and if you don't want kids, you don't have to have a reason for it. Don't cave in to the pressure if you don't want to be a parent. It's fine not to want to be a parent. Really.
Cass

Claremont, CA

#7 Jan 18, 2014
An ex-BF at age 10? Is this a joke?
pde

Bothell, WA

#8 Jan 18, 2014
Sublime1 wrote:
LW2: I don't understand how, if it is only two of you that you are CONSTANTLY cleaning and doing laundry? How much mess can 2 adults possibly make? Our house would be immaculate without kids and we'd probably have at most 6 loads of laundry a week. He sounds lazy and you sound like a drama queen.
If one adult refuses to do even the simple "pick up after self" stuff, it can be quite a regarding cleaning.

As for laundry: I wonder if she's like my MIL. My MIL washes the clothing from the day before, and the bath towels/kitchen towels from the day before every single morning when she's at home. She changes sheets every couple of days. There are only two adults in the household and she is constantly doing laundry. A lot of women of her generation seem to do the same, and some appear to have taught their daughters that is what must be done.

Personally, I find it a waste of water and time. I run big loads, whenever I have enough of a particular type to fill the machine. Generally that results in 2 dark colored loads, 1 light colored load, 1 white load, 1 towel load and 2 bed sheets load a week with 2 adults and 1 kid. And that's when I'm being on top of things and not letting the sheets go two weeks.
Kuuipo

Salinas, CA

#9 Jan 18, 2014
LW1: Change the locks ASAP and find a good kennel for your dog to stay in while you are away. Ugh. What a piece of work your friend's husband is. If you tell your friend, you will probably irrevocably damage the friendship, but in reality, it's probably pretty damaged anyway.

LW2: You should not be the only one maintaining your home. However, arguing about it is not yielding the desired result. Hire a housekeeper. It is money well spent.

LW3: You seem in a pretty big rush to start dating. 10? Where are your parents?

LW4: Team Abby.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

#10 Jan 18, 2014
Kuuipo wrote:
LW1: Change the locks ASAP and find a good kennel for your dog to stay in while you are away. Ugh. What a piece of work your friend's husband is. If you tell your friend, you will probably irrevocably damage the friendship, but in reality, it's probably pretty damaged anyway.
Kennel your dogs, change the locks, have your neighbor tested for STDs, ruin your friendship... Sounds a little over-reacting because you were hit on....by someone who later apologized. And who knows, maybe his wife put him up to it?

No, put this in your back pocket and move on.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

#11 Jan 18, 2014
Kuuipo wrote:
LW3: You seem in a pretty big rush to start dating. 10? Where are your parents?
I'd like to know what her mom said that she didn't like.

"You're too young to date and stop being a wh0 re. And did you steal my makeup again?!"

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