Abby 5-6

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“boredom made me do it”

Since: Aug 08

ny, ny

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#21
May 6, 2013
 
LW1, fwiw, there's a good possibility that your niece's boyfriend finds it every bit as annoying as you do, and she's only doing it so that she can multi-task and do something else at the same time. Her bf might be really happy if you ask her to pick up the handset please.

LW2 - Nah, that's okay. Your wife can just choose to opt out of family holidays altogether. Clearly the request for everybody's schedule is a charade since they end up at the same place every year. It would be a lot more honest and upfront if they said "Let us know if you have off." and quit with the charade since clearly it always works for everybody else or they don't care if others can't make it either.

LW3 - Yeah. Give him the option. You should have given it to him at the time you decided to keep the child. You wouldn't be having this issue now if you'd done that, and you'd have your answer.

Don't be surprised if he doesn't want it and sigh @ Abby. Yeah, the man has a financial obligation but if she's doing fine and isn't asking about the money, don't tell her to ask about the money. That wasn't the point of her question. If she's fine not asking him for it, let her be fine with not asking him for it.

Since: Jan 10

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#22
May 6, 2013
 
Along the lines of what ani said to LW3: I knew a woman who got very little child support from her daughter's father (friend's exhb). Ex made a ton of money and was remarried and had two very indulged, spoiled kids from that marriage. Friend thought that the best thing for her kid was to live the way they did (small apartment with a roommate) than to take the dad to court for the child support he should be paying. SHe knew if she pushed for more money (and money was tight for them), he'd withdraw more as a father, and her daughter needed an involved (if selfish asshole at the same time) father more than she needed more child support.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#23
May 6, 2013
 
LW2: Who exactly is the "family" in question throwing the shindig? If its your parents or sibling, then yeah, they should probably do a better job of trying to accommodate you. If its an aunt/uncle or a cousin, sorry, you're low man on the totem pole. Unless I'm like their favorite nephew or cousin, I can't imagine expecting one of those relatives to rearrange holiday plans on my behalf. They're probably going thru the charade to at least give the impression that they are trying to accommodate you

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#24
May 6, 2013
 
Toj wrote:
L3: So this woman wants to erase half of her baby's identity? You're scum.
??? She's scum? He does not want baby. He does not want to be a father. She's obliging him. It would be better to force him into a life neither of them want? Sounds pleasant.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#25
May 6, 2013
 
Aisle Sitter wrote:
<quoted text>
my mom will call my cell at 5:30, and i think she expects me to be at home...? not sure what's up ihwt that.
That does not seem odd to me unless the time you get off work does not leave you enough time to get home by 5:30. Getting off at 5pm and home by 5:30 seems pretty ordinary to me.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me!

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#26
May 6, 2013
 
You've never commuted to Manhattan.
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>That does not seem odd to me unless the time you get off work does not leave you enough time to get home by 5:30. Getting off at 5pm and home by 5:30 seems pretty ordinary to me.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#27
May 6, 2013
 
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>
??? She's scum? He does not want baby. He does not want to be a father. She's obliging him. It would be better to force him into a life neither of them want? Sounds pleasant.
No, he did not want it. But now his baby exists. He should get to know he has a child in the world. At least I think he does.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#28
May 6, 2013
 
RACE wrote:
You've never commuted to Manhattan.
<quoted text>
But she's in Schaumburg, Ill (which I know nothing about).

“It made sense at the time....”

Since: May 09

Des Plaines, IL

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#29
May 6, 2013
 
i'M starting to believe that it takes at least a half an hour to get almost anywhere in the chicago area, at a minimum...

my office hours are 9-5, but often i end up packing it in sometime after 5, and my mom is somewhat aware of it. i'm in my busy season now, which means i can be lucky to leave by 5:30. it can take me 10 minutes to get to my car from the time i turn off my computer. so, to still be in the car at 5:30 is not uncommon, even on a good day. and the drive is 20 minutes.

and while my office isn't in schaumburg, i am about a 15 minute drive from Woodfield Mall. that is about 45 minutes from the Loop in chicago in traffic right now.

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#30
May 7, 2013
 
My commute: 10 miles, 20 minutes. I love it.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

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#31
May 7, 2013
 

Judged:

1

Does that include shoveling out the car?
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
My commute: 10 miles, 20 minutes. I love it.

Since: Mar 09

United States

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#32
May 7, 2013
 
My commute: 5-7 minutes as long as I don't get stuck at the drawbridge. 20 minutes if I walk.
:)

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#33
May 7, 2013
 
RACE wrote:
Does that include shoveling out the car?
<quoted text>
Only October through May. Add 10 minutes.

Toj

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#34
May 7, 2013
 
My commute from door to door: 1 hour, 10 minutes. That's actually not a bad commute for a suburbanite to the Loop.

“I Am Mine”

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#35
May 7, 2013
 
Toj wrote:
My commute from door to door: 1 hour, 10 minutes. That's actually not a bad commute for a suburbanite to the Loop.
no way in hell i could do that. When looking for new job, recruiter presented position in Melbourne. About an hour away. I did not even consider it for a millisecomd

“Licensed to Ill”

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#36
May 7, 2013
 
I had about a 45-60 hour commute when I lived in Chicago-land. Then my office moved from the north burbs to the western burbs and it was like 1.5-2 hour commute each way!!!

I had about a 40 minute commute in CO.

Here I have an 8 minute commute ... LOVE IT!!

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

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#37
May 7, 2013
 
1hr west of you?
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>no way in hell i could do that. When looking for new job, recruiter presented position in Melbourne. About an hour away. I did not even consider it for a millisecomd

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

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#38
May 7, 2013
 
Toj wrote:
My commute from door to door: 1 hour, 10 minutes. That's actually not a bad commute for a suburbanite to the Loop.
Mine is roughly and hour, door to door. Some of it is walking, some of it is on the L. Relatively speaking, it is a very easy commute and I wouldn't willingly change it.

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

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#39
May 7, 2013
 
If I took Metra and got an express train, it is a tad over 1 hour door to door. However, I drive. In teh morning it might take almost an hour door to door. In teh evening I can make it from signing out at teh front desk to the parking lot, wait for teh car to be brought down and in my front door in under 35 minutes.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#40
May 7, 2013
 
RACE wrote:
1hr west of you?
<quoted text>
se

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