Amy 2-19

[RedheadwGlasses]

No, I get what edog is saying. IF you register for gifts for your wedding, normal gifts, and I buy you a crock pot, and your plan all along was to donate gifts to some charity without telling me that, screw you. I am giving a gift to YOU, not to a charity. If you'd told me up front that it was going to a charity, I may or may not have spent that much money or put so much thought into a gift.

[edogxxx]

Sam I Am wrote:

<quoted text>
I am guessing that most of your "gifts" have some type of underlying expectation attached.

Yes, the expectation is you're gonna use it, not give it away. Give your own sht away, I ain't your dam charity provider.

[edogxxx]

RACE wrote:

No, I am sure she thought the bride was at a 2nd grade reading level, and she wanted to own every Dr Suess book availiable.
(rolls eyes)
You leave me wondering sometimes dog.
<quoted text>

Maybe she has a two year old or wants them for future children? Or maybe she DOES have a second grade reading level. I'm not gonna analyze why she wants such a thing.

[RedheadwGlasses]

I give a lot to charity, in my mind. I want my donations to charity to be my choice, not someone else's.

[j_m_w]

RedheadwGlasses wrote:

I give a lot to charity, in my mind. I want my donations to charity to be my choice, not someone else's.

This, and there's a major element of deception in the scenario you described above, too. Eff that.

[Mister Tonka]

edogxxx wrote:

Then don't register the Millenium Falcon gravy bowl!
And gift reciepts are really meant for exchanging something if it's the wrong size or whatever.

Sez you. If I get a gift reciept with a gift that I don't like and have no plans to ever use, you bet your ass I'm going to exchange it for something I want. You might give me some assless chaps for my birthday thinking they would look great on me, but that ain't my style. I'll never wear them. So guess what? They're getting returned.

edogxxx wrote:

That's fine. But if I get you that Little Bo Peep dress with the pink frill you asked for, and you say "Great, I'm on my way to Goodwill now and they're gonna love this!" Then that's tacky and wrong.

So what if a couple has everything they need and don't register anywhere. YOu are then left to your own devices on what to give them. Do you feel they are obligated to keep whatever you give them? What if you give them a check? Are they not permitted to donate the money to the charity of their choice?

[Mister Tonka]

RedheadwGlasses wrote:

I may or may not have spent that much money or put so much thought into a gift.

Thought schmought. Gimme a list I can pick something from. Otherwise, I'll stop by the dollar store to pick up a card on the way to the wedding and write a check out while sitting in the parking lot.

[Mister Tonka]

edogxxx wrote:

Give your own sht away,

Once you give it to me as a gift, it IS my sht.

[RedheadwGlasses]

Assless chaps should be THE go-to wedding gift for the 2013 wedding season!

Saturday night, Nick made me (us) watch the first 20 minutes of WEdding Crashers.

[RACE]

Yeah, cause her being a teacher of small children and asking for children's books for wedding gifts is just too many variables for you to string along into one logical conclusion.

edogxxx wrote:

<quoted text>
Maybe she has a two year old or wants them for future children? Or maybe she DOES have a second grade reading level. I'm not gonna analyze why she wants such a thing.

[Sam I Am]

edogxxx wrote:

<quoted text>
Yes, the expectation is you're gonna use it, not give it away. Give your own sht away, I ain't your dam charity provider.

Once you give me something, it IS my own sh!t.

[RACE]

This is true, but I dont think there was any lack of transparency in Shari's example. She is a teacher and asked for childrens books. Not rocket science (well, it is to emutt, but thats a whole nuther planet)

RedheadwGlasses wrote:

No, I get what edog is saying. IF you register for gifts for your wedding, normal gifts, and I buy you a crock pot, and your plan all along was to donate gifts to some charity without telling me that, screw you. I am giving a gift to YOU, not to a charity. If you'd told me up front that it was going to a charity, I may or may not have spent that much money or put so much thought into a gift.

[Toj]

edogxxx wrote:

<quoted text>
Then don't register the Millenium Falcon gravy bowl!
And gift reciepts are really meant for exchanging something if it's the wrong size or whatever. That's fine. But if I get you that Little Bo Peep dress with the pink frill you asked for, and you say "Great, I'm on my way to Goodwill now and they're gonna love this!" Then that's tacky and wrong.

(sigh) And how would you know that they gave it to Goodwill? Do you ask people why they don't wear/use the gifts you get them?

[Toj]

RedheadwGlasses wrote:

Assless chaps should be THE go-to wedding gift for the 2013 wedding season!
Saturday night, Nick made me (us) watch the first 20 minutes of WEdding Crashers.

I like that movie.

[Aisle Sitter]

RedheadwGlasses wrote:

I give a lot to charity, in my mind. I want my donations to charity to be my choice, not someone else's.

i don't mind giving for a memorial or in honor of someone for some milestone, but what i don;t like is the constant, consistant mailers and solicitations. some of them put America's Test Kitchen to shame in their persistance!

I must now make a mental note to adivse the 2 organizations we're aksing for memorial donations for my gramma to not continually pester people.

[edogxxx]

Mister Tonka wrote:

<quoted text>Once you give it to me as a gift, it IS my sht.

If you aren't up front about what you intend to do with said gift, you're being intentionally deceptive, and THAT is what's wrong. If you had told me you were intending to give that expensive cashmire sweater I gave you to charity, I would have gotten something cheap off the clearance rack instead. Otherwise you're playing me for a sucker.

[pde]

edogxxx wrote:

<quoted text>
If you aren't up front about what you intend to do with said gift, you're being intentionally deceptive, and THAT is what's wrong. If you had told me you were intending to give that expensive cashmire sweater I gave you to charity, I would have gotten something cheap off the clearance rack instead. Otherwise you're playing me for a sucker.

It doesn't matter how expensive it was, if it's butt-ugly.

[Mister Tonka]

edogxxx wrote:

<quoted text>
If you aren't up front about what you intend to do with said gift, you're being intentionally deceptive, and THAT is what's wrong. If you had told me you were intending to give that expensive cashmire sweater I gave you to charity, I would have gotten something cheap off the clearance rack instead. Otherwise you're playing me for a sucker.

Wait, what? When you buy someone a gift, you first determine their intent? And here I've been just giving gifts to people all along without first asking qualifying questions.
Obviously *I* must be doing my gifting incorrectly.

[Shari23]

RedheadwGlasses wrote:

<quoted text>
I probably would spend even more money on that than I would a typical wedding gift.

I think that happened. There were so many books it would have been a good start on a library.

[Shari23]

LW2 - The same niece that did the book thing had a regular registry for her wedding. But what I liked was that she had very, very inexpensive items listed that anyone could afford as well as normal priced items but nothing really expensive. She's really a neat person.