“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#1 Apr 28, 2013
DEAR ABBY: As a father of two teenage daughters, I have a question about couples living together. Do relationships that start this way have a higher failure rate than those that don't? What should be considered when a young girl has the "living together" question presented to her by a young man? And most important, what can I as a father do to help my daughters make an intelligent decision about this, other than just "load my shotgun" (LOL)?

As always, thank you for broadening my wisdom horizon and giving me examples of solid advice from which both my and my family's life have been enriched.-- LONGTIME FAN IN OHIO

DEAR LONGTIME FAN: It depends upon whether the couple living together are engaged to be married and their level of education. From what I've read, the higher the level of education, the more stable the couple will be. If the question is presented to your daughters, ideally you will have gotten to know the young man, and the relationship will have developed beyond the casual stage.

However, I cannot stress strongly enough the importance of your girls being independent, self-supporting and completing their education before they decide to do this. One of the most common reasons women remain in unhappy marriages/relationships is the fear they can't survive on their own.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are hoping you could shed some light on the practice of throwing rice at a wedding. We were not only wondering when and how the practice started, but also do people still throw rice today at weddings? We had heard that guests had stopped doing so to help protect wildlife (especially birds). Have you found this to be true? If so, what do we throw now?-- EMPTY-HANDED IN WISCONSIN

DEAR EMPTY-HANDED: Rice-throwing is an ancient tradition that may date back to ancient Rome and Egypt or even earlier. It was a ritual having to do with fertility -- many grains of rice equating to having many children. In some countries, the couple is pelted with dates, raisins or even eggs, according to Ask Yahoo.

According to Emily Post: "All the traditional materials have their drawbacks: Rice can be dangerous for birds if ingested; birdseed can sprout weeds in unwanted places; rose petals are notoriously slippery; and even bubbles can stain a gown. Instead, you might distribute colored flags or streamers for guests to wave.... It beats assigning someone the nearly impossible task of trying to recover grains and seeds from grass and flower beds."

It's Abby again: This is why I recommend that instead of tossing anything, you shower the happy couple with good wishes.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have three daughters, identical triplets. We, like many parents of multiples, are tired of questions and unsolicited comments from strangers concerning IVF -- which we did not use, hence "identical" -- or anything else triplet-related.

I don't think people realize how rude they are being. I have been asked when did I know, how much did they weigh, what are their full names, etc.

Abby, would you please discuss baby etiquette with the world? I do not feel questions about my children from total strangers are appropriate. They even make me feel unsafe.-- MULTIPLE MOM IN OKLAHOMA

DEAR MULTIPLE MOM: Identical triplets are unusual, and what the questioners are doing is exhibiting natural curiosity. While I agree that asking how your d

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

#2 Apr 28, 2013
1- They should learn to live on their own before living with their partner. And it's my belief that people SHOULD live together before getting married.

2- Throw bird seed. And try to throw it down the woman's dress.

3- Woohoo! Triplet porn!

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#3 Apr 28, 2013
PEllen wrote:
tossing anything, you shower the happy couple with good wishes.
DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have three daughters, identical triplets. We, like many parents of multiples, are tired of questions and unsolicited comments from strangers concerning IVF -- which we did not use, hence "identical" -- or anything else triplet-related.
I don't think people realize how rude they are being. I have been asked when did I know, how much did they weigh, what are their full names, etc.
Abby, would you please discuss baby etiquette with the world? I do not feel questions about my children from total strangers are appropriate. They even make me feel unsafe.-- MULTIPLE MOM IN OKLAHOMA
DEAR MULTIPLE MOM: Identical triplets are unusual, and what the questioners are doing is exhibiting natural curiosity. While I agree that asking how your daughters were conceived is inappropriate, a polite way to respond would be to say, "They were conceived with love."
Complete last answer
DEAR MULTIPLE MOM: Identical triplets are unusual, and what the questioners are doing is exhibiting natural curiosity. While I agree that asking how your daughters were conceived is inappropriate, a polite way to respond would be to say, "They were conceived with love."
boundary painter

San Antonio, TX

#4 Apr 28, 2013
LW1 got a good answer. He should do what he can to empower his daughters to take care of themselves
whether they marry or not.

LW2 and LW3 are all right.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#5 Apr 28, 2013
L1: Weird question from a dad of teenagers. I think everyone -- male and female -- should be confident they can make survive on their own, know how to deal with finances and housekeeping.

L2: Personally, had a balloon release. I suppose something is wrong with that, too. They probably pop and kill something or is not green enough.

L3: People are human. You don't have to answer any question if you choose not to. "We love our babies/children and we'd prefer not to answer any personal questions."

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

#6 Apr 28, 2013
Toj wrote:
L2: Personally, had a balloon release. I suppose something is wrong with that, too.
Litter.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#7 Apr 28, 2013
LW1: ""Do relationships that start this way have a higher failure rate than those that don't?"

You're not really clear with your question. NO relationship STARTS with the couple living together. So I can only assume you are asking about MARRIAGES that are precluded by a period of cohabitation.

Carry on with your question.

LW2: Go to wikipedia and quit ruining my advice column.

LW3: Is this REALLY a problem? It would never occur to me to ask such a question, so I find it hard to believe this happens to you frequently.

Since: Mar 09

Pittsburgh, PA

#8 Apr 28, 2013
edogxxx wrote:
3- Woohoo! Triplet porn!
I think Dr. Phil's daughter-in-law and her sisters already have that covered!
Stina

Saint Petersburg, FL

#9 Apr 29, 2013
LW3: PLEASE just tell us that you don't dress them all the same!!!

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Chicago Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
Messianic Jews say they are persecuted in Israel (Jun '08) 21 min JOEL 69,967
Barack Obama, our next President (Nov '08) 36 min John Galt 1,124,814
BARACK OBAMA BIRTH CERTIFICATE: Suit contesting... (Jan '09) 42 min wojar 179,264
Do you find smoking attractive? (No posts about... 1 hr Yes 3
Chicago a model city 2 hr Just me 6
Father Of Hans Peterson Speaks Out (Oct '07) 3 hr Getagrip 44
Ill. House Approves Legalizing Same-Sex Civil U... (Dec '10) 3 hr Boy G 50,587
Chicago Dating
Find my Match

Chicago Jobs

Chicago People Search

Addresses and phone numbers for FREE

Chicago News, Events & Info

Click for news, events and info in Chicago

Personal Finance

Mortgages [ See current mortgage rates ]