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1 - 12 of 12 Comments Last updated Apr 26, 2014

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

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#1
Apr 25, 2014
 
DEAR ABBY: I am a woman in a loving relationship with another woman. My family has been harsh in their remarks to me, saying they would rather I was dead than doing this, or that I should move away if this is the way I am going to live.

I have been married twice. Neither marriage worked out. During my childhood, I was molested by a family member. Since then, I have been scared of men and don't want to be around them. I have had crushes on women in the past, but didn't tell my family because I'm a 30-year-old adult and I felt it was none of their business.

I keep asking myself if my attraction to my lover was a choice, but I don't remember "choosing" this. All I remember is falling for her and not wanting to look back. Should I end this relationship and live alone forever? I never want to be with another man as long as I live.-- ACHING IN AMARILLO

DEAR ACHING: Because your family is so unaccepting of your sexual orientation, it would be interesting to know how they view your molester. Did you tell anyone what happened, and did you receive counseling about it? If the answer is you didn't, then PLEASE consider getting some now to help you deal with any residual issues because you appear to have a few -- like your fear of and aversion to all men.

What your family said was cruel and uncalled-for. It's apparent they know nothing about homosexuality. There is a chapter of PFLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) about two hours away from your community, located in Lubbock. It can provide information to help you build bridges of understanding with your family.

Assuming the feelings you have for this woman are reciprocated, the two of you might be happier moving to a community that is more welcoming. Texas is a big, diverse state and Dallas, Houston or Austin might be a better fit for you.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 13-year-old girl who has been told many times that I'm very mature for my age. Unfortunately, I'm TOO mature. What I want most in the world is sex appeal. I long for the perfect sex-crazed boyfriend. What can I do about this craving?-- BEYOND MY YEARS IN KENTUCKY

DEAR BEYOND: The first thing you should do about this "craving" is learn all you can about birth control and self-control, because the "perfect sex-crazed boyfriend" could get you -- and himself -- into a world of trouble. At 13, you should be focused on sports and getting into and out of high school with a diploma.

Whoever told you you are mature for your age must have meant physically, because when a girl's No. 1 desire in the world is sex appeal and a sex-crazed boyfriend, it is not a sign of EMOTIONAL maturity.

DEAR ABBY: Last year I made a beautiful welcome wreath for my friend to hang on her front door. After all this time, it's still sitting in a box in her basement. If she doesn't like it, I would like to ask for it back, so I can use and enjoy it. Abby, can I do this? What could I say?-- LORRIE IN FLORIDA

DEAR LORRIE: It has always been my belief that once a gift has been given, it's inappropriate to ask for it back. However, if you feel comfortable enough with your friend to do so, tell her exactly what you told me: That since she has never used the wreath, you would like to have it for your own front door.

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

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#2
Apr 25, 2014
 

Judged:

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1.Hard to make any respone that isn't going to get skewered from one side or another, but I bet she never aid she was molested, or uf her orientation was latent what she calls molestation might have been something less. Not every ass pat by tour grandpa is molestation

2 Fake especially since it was written to Dear Abby.

3. Sure, ask. Clearly it isn't her taste. Dd you consider that when you gave it to her?

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me!

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#3
Apr 25, 2014
 
1 Ha! abby says its ok for you to be run outta town!

2 Buy a BOB you train wreck.

3 If she aint using it, then yeah, ask for it back.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Chicago, IL

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#4
Apr 25, 2014
 
1- What Abby said. It's no wonder this woman had two failed marriages

2- I agree this sounds fake. But if not, I'll look forward to seeing you on "16 and Pregnant" in a couple years

3- Maybe she's waiting until Christmas time?

“Licensed to Ill”

Since: Aug 08

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#5
Apr 25, 2014
 
LW1: The heart has a mind of its own. Love is not a choice that you make.

I think this letter is fake, but if not she needs therapy. I think itís fake because I donít see how she gets from I hate men to should I leave my lesbian lover? If she writes in again I bet it will be something like ďAbby, blah, blah, blah, I hate men, blah, blah blah, I hate men, what color should I paint my wall, pink or green?Ē

LW2: Get a vibrating my little pony, and stay away from boys. Fake!!

LW3: Next time get her a full 1.75 bottle of grey goose to hang on her front door instead of a stupid wreath

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#6
Apr 25, 2014
 
L1: Pellen -- families can be in extreme denial about molestations by other family members. Whether true or not, it would seem that this woman needs a great deal of therapy and the sooner the better.

L2: I'm with you guys. This sounds extremely fake.

L3: I would never ask for a gift back. It is hers to regift, sell at a garage sale, take up room in her basement or whatever. The LW made on wreath, make another for yourself.

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

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#7
Apr 25, 2014
 

Judged:

3

These letters make me feel really good about my life.

“Checks and Balances”

Since: Apr 13

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#8
Apr 25, 2014
 

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LW3- I can't believe that Abby actually suggested to ask for the gift back! Once you give a gift, it is no longer yours. Maybe she doesn't want her house to look cluttered, so she is waiting until she gets around to redecorating. Maybe she considers it holiday specific. Maybe she really appreciates the effort you put into it, but it is just not her style, nor does it match her decor (my SIL made me a yarn wrapped wreath for Christmas a few years ago - I love her, but that thing just doesn't match anywhere in my house).

I appreciate the time and thought that people put into homemade gifts, but unless someone is making me winter accessories (hat, scarf, fingerless gloves), I'm probably not going to use them. People made my boys a ridiculous number of baby blankets (an entire black garbage bag full), and I never used one of them (they weren't as soft as the store bought ones and the boys would start pulling on the yarn as soon as they could control their movements).

Just get people gift certificates for food or send them Swiss Colony or Figi's stuff. I like candles, too, because they are consumable.
Kuuipo

Herndon, VA

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#9
Apr 25, 2014
 

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LW1: Good advice from Abby. You do need counseling, and relocating might give you a new lease on life. A gay friend of mine lives in San Antonio. Or you could try someplace farther away like San Francisco or New Orleans. You would raise no eyebrows there.

LW2: This is probably fake; if not, it is from an immature teen looking for attention. Either way, meh.

LW3: NEVER ask for a gift back! That's tacky, tacky, tacky! Make another one for yourself!
Julie

Skokie, IL

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#10
Apr 25, 2014
 
LW2: I'm a 13-year-old girl who has been told many times that I'm very mature for my age. Unfortunately, I'm TOO mature. What I want most in the world is sex appeal. I long for the perfect sex-crazed boyfriend. What can I do about this craving?

Hook up with EDog. You two are made for each other.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me!

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#11
Apr 25, 2014
 
Ha!
as funny as that is. I would not wish jail time on anybody.
Julie wrote:
LW2: I'm a 13-year-old girl who has been told many times that I'm very mature for my age. Unfortunately, I'm TOO mature. What I want most in the world is sex appeal. I long for the perfect sex-crazed boyfriend. What can I do about this craving?
Hook up with EDog. You two are made for each other.
boundary painter

San Antonio, TX

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#12
Apr 26, 2014
 
Very sorry LW1's family is giving our State a rude name. Encourage her and her SO to move to Dallas or another kinder and more realistic city.

LW2 looks like poorly written fiction. Instead of giving the blue grass state a bad name, couldn't the writer have just asked for tips on how to get a boy to like her?

LW3 is giving the Sunshine State a bad name. Most people would realize the friend didn't want to hang that gift on the door. So what?

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