Abby 2-18

[RedheadwGlasses]

Etiquette says you don't owe any guests NOT in relationships a "plus 1" on their invite. I didn't do it when I was getting married. But engaged or married couples *must* be invited as a couple, and once you start getting into dating couples, you need to be consistent. You can't invite one couple who's been dating for 3 months and then leave off the 1-year girlfriend of someone else.

[RACE]

So all this could be the bride and grooms fault and not the BF!

RedheadwGlasses wrote:

Etiquette says you don't owe any guests NOT in relationships a "plus 1" on their invite. I didn't do it when I was getting married. But engaged or married couples *must* be invited as a couple, and once you start getting into dating couples, you need to be consistent. You can't invite one couple who's been dating for 3 months and then leave off the 1-year girlfriend of someone else.

[edogxxx]

RedheadwGlasses wrote:

Etiquette says you don't owe any guests NOT in relationships a "plus 1" on their invite. I didn't do it when I was getting married. But engaged or married couples *must* be invited as a couple, and once you start getting into dating couples, you need to be consistent. You can't invite one couple who's been dating for 3 months and then leave off the 1-year girlfriend of someone else.

Then according to etiquette, only a couple that's married should both be invited.

[edogxxx]

pde wrote:

<quoted text>
I don't see the conflict.
In post 9, he's slamming the woman for wanting their decisions to be respected.
In post 10, he's defending the man who is not respecting his girlfriend.
Basically, both posts say that the women in these situations are not deserving of respect, or deserving to react to a lack of respect.

Spoken like a true man-hater.

Controlling men are aholes. Controlling women have "decisions that should be respected."

[Sam I Am]

1. So basically Eddie is picking the feeling of a waitress he sees once in awhile over yours. Think about it...think about it....

2. Youuuuuuuuuu sound like a PITA. and I think hyphenating children's names is dumb.

3. And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon....

[Sam I Am]

edogxxx wrote:

<quoted text>
This seems a bit harsh. Frankly, I wouldn't WANT to be dragged to a wedding where I didn't know anybody, especially the bride and groom.

Well of course not, you have the social skills of a 2-yr.-old with a poopy diaper. Other people would enjoy being with their SO and meeting new people in a festive setting.

[wut]

what

[RedheadwGlasses]

RACE wrote:

So all this could be the bride and grooms fault and not the BF!
<quoted text>

Yes, but the boyfriend should decline and if pressed, then he can say "Sorry, I just don't feel comfortable going to a wedding without my girlfriend." That gives the bride/groom a chance to say "Oh,I didn't realize you two had been dating that long, she's invited too then!" Or not.

However, I don't think this boyfriend has been too upfront with the bar crowd about his girlfriend.

[edogxxx]

Sam I Am wrote:

<quoted text>
Well of course not, you have the social skills of a 2-yr.-old with a poopy diaper. Other people would enjoy being with their SO and meeting new people in a festive setting.

Oh please, I've seen it too many times with my own eyes.

Women who are dragged to weddings where they don't know anybody usually end up sitting alone at a table sulking while giving her man the evil eye for walking around talking to people instead of being chained to her hip.

[RedheadwGlasses]

edogxxx wrote:

<quoted text>
Oh please, I've seen it too many times with my own eyes.
Women who are dragged to weddings where they don't know anybody usually end up sitting alone at a table sulking while giving her man the evil eye for walking around talking to people instead of being chained to her hip.

I think it depends mor eon whether someone is an introvert or an extrovert, not gender.

[Sam I Am]

edogxxx wrote:

<quoted text>
Oh please, I've seen it too many times with my own eyes.
Women who are dragged to weddings where they don't know anybody usually end up sitting alone at a table sulking while giving her man the evil eye for walking around talking to people instead of being chained to her hip.

I don't know what kind of social misfits you are hanging out with. Sulking and giving their man the evil eye? The invitee should do a better job of including his/her guest. And I have seen with my own eyes outsiders carry on civil conversations with insiders. I have even witnessed smiles and laughter. I have been the outsider guest several times, and it just isn't that hard.

[PEllen]

Sam I Am wrote:

<quoted text>
I don't know what kind of social misfits you are hanging out with. Sulking and giving their man the evil eye? The invitee should do a better job of including his/her guest. And I have seen with my own eyes outsiders carry on civil conversations with insiders. I have even witnessed smiles and laughter. I have been the outsider guest several times, and it just isn't that hard.

You are gregarious. Not everyone is. Before you starting coming around tehre was even a searate thread for non-extroverts here.

Some people are shy and don't mingle well. Dog's description is not that unusual a situation.

[Mister Tonka]

PEllen wrote:

<quoted text>You are gregarious. Not everyone is. Before you starting coming around tehre was even a searate thread for non-extroverts here.
Some people are shy and don't mingle well. Dog's description is not that unusual a situation.

I had a friend who brought his psycho ex to a edding BECAUSE he would not have to babysit her. She was very outgoing and the other person he was thinking of bringing was not and she didn't know anyone at the wedding.

[j_m_w]

Sam I Am wrote:

<quoted text>
I have been the outsider guest several times, and it just isn't that hard.

For you. For some people, it is a challenge. And there's a world of happy medium between sulking/giving the evil eye and being a social butterfly.

All that aside, I agree with Angela's take on inviting people as couples.

[Kuuipo]

Sam I Am wrote:

1. So basically Eddie is picking the feeling of a waitress he sees once in awhile over yours. Think about it...think about it....

Exactly! This is the real issue.

[RACE]

from the letter....
I was not invited. Eddie doesn't dance and has slow danced with me only once. When I told him I would not appreciate him slow dancing with anyone there,

Kuuipo wrote:

<quoted text>
Exactly! This is the real issue.

The real issue is her controlling him, not his disrespecting her.
She does not say she wanted to attend, or that she is hurt about not being invited, she just wants to make sure eddie does not pop wood dancing with someone.

[Mister Tonka]

RACE wrote:

from the letter....
I was not invited. Eddie doesn't dance and has slow danced with me only once. When I told him I would not appreciate him slow dancing with anyone there,
<quoted text>
The real issue is her controlling him, not his disrespecting her.
She does not say she wanted to attend, or that she is hurt about not being invited, she just wants to make sure eddie does not pop wood dancing with someone.

Exactly. If he does not dance, why did she feel the need to even throw that out there. He probably does not do smack and coke either. Maybe she should make it clear that she would not appreciate him doing those either.