Topix Chitown Regulars

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Melrose Park, IL

#97771 Apr 16, 2014
ScarletandOlive wrote:
This is a journey and as a nation we must keep trying to push forward, not backtrack.
Is allowing citizens to carry firearms a move forward, or backward?

And making laws on morality is done all the time. Actually it's a liberal movement, not a conservative one
Zap Brannigan

United States

#97772 Apr 16, 2014
Here is your original post.

"Is this news anywhere else? Isn't this exactly what the Democrats have been demonizing the Koch brothers for when they financed the Tea Party? I don't support either movement, but I hate hypocrisy."

Exactly whose hypocisy are you talking about? Quit being an edog, you're better than that.
ScarletandOlive wrote:
<quoted text>
I didn't say he was being supported by the Dems. The Repubs didn't support the Tea Partiers, either (which is the main reason there is such a rift in the GOP).
The Democratic Party feels pretty strongly that individuals should not be allowed to spend so much of their money on political issues.

“Checks and Balances”

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#97773 Apr 16, 2014
Ok, I need people to give me some new perspectives. I'm not trying to judge, just don't understand where some people are coming from.

If a couple is living together for several years and has completely commingled their lives, what is the purpose of having a formal, traditional wedding? Especially when there are already children involved, this kind of rubs me the wrong way. They are not combining their families, because that would have already been done over the years. It is not a big change in their lives, because at that point it is just legalizing the way they have already chosen to live. Do you change the gift you give in this situation?

Am I just jaded because I hate weddings and spending ridiculous amounts of money for one day?
Zap Brannigan

United States

#97775 Apr 16, 2014
So the Christian Fundamentalists that are the base of the Republican Party are actually liberal Democrats?
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>
And making laws on morality is done all the time. Actually it's a liberal movement, not a conservative one

“Checks and Balances”

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#97776 Apr 16, 2014
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>Is allowing citizens to carry firearms a move forward, or backward?

And making laws on morality is done all the time. Actually it's a liberal movement, not a conservative one
Many conservatives have a very narrow view of morality. They attempt to make laws restricting other's freedoms.

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

#97778 Apr 16, 2014
HoneyBear1 wrote:
<quoted text> LMAO!!! That was funny. Thanks for the laugh. Maybe Father time needs to give ol Mother Nature a little nookie. Lol. Something my cousin said on FB, also hilarious.. "Dear Mother Nature, until you acknowledge that it is spring, you will be known as Mother, something else."
Persephone is too busy getting her freak on with Hades to notice it's supposed to be spring.

“Where is Tonka?”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#97779 Apr 16, 2014
My question is why do you care that they want a traditional wedding?
I would not care, I would just figure, that's what they want, and its their wedding, and would put no more thought into it than that.

Being a guy is great.

ScarletandOlive wrote:
Ok, I need people to give me some new perspectives. I'm not trying to judge, just don't understand where some people are coming from.
If a couple is living together for several years and has completely commingled their lives, what is the purpose of having a formal, traditional wedding? Especially when there are already children involved, this kind of rubs me the wrong way. They are not combining their families, because that would have already been done over the years. It is not a big change in their lives, because at that point it is just legalizing the way they have already chosen to live. Do you change the gift you give in this situation?
Am I just jaded because I hate weddings and spending ridiculous amounts of money for one day?

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Melrose Park, IL

#97781 Apr 16, 2014
ScarletandOlive wrote:
<quoted text>
Many conservatives have a very narrow view of morality. They attempt to make laws restricting other's freedoms.
Like giving black's civil rights, women the right to vote, citizens the right to conceal carry? Those freedoms?

It was democrats who attempted to ban soft drinks, democrats who banned smoking, democrats who require me to wear my seatbelt... in the back seat, democrats who demand I must buy health insurance, democrats who want to limit how much I give to a candidate

How can you say it's the REPUBLICANS who want to limit freedoms and keep a straight face?

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#97782 Apr 16, 2014
ScarletandOlive wrote:
Am I just jaded because I hate weddings and spending ridiculous amounts of money for one day?
Yes.

Whether you like it or not, many of US do things in life simply because "that's what you are supposed to do. That's just how its always been done"

Society has a generally accepted outline to life. Ie: the norm. Hearing 'here comes the bride' as this woman in a flowing white gown walks down the aisle is part of that.

I'm curious as to why you are so concerned with someone else blowing there own money in one day. Whether someone wants to spend all their money on charity or on hookers and blow, its not my money, so I don't care how other people spend their money...unless they wanna spend it on me.

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

#97783 Apr 16, 2014
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Yes.
Whether you like it or not, many of US do things in life simply because "that's what you are supposed to do. That's just how its always been done"
Society has a generally accepted outline to life. Ie: the norm. Hearing 'here comes the bride' as this woman in a flowing white gown walks down the aisle is part of that.
I'm curious as to why you are so concerned with someone else blowing there own money in one day. Whether someone wants to spend all their money on charity or on hookers and blow, its not my money, so I don't care how other people spend their money...unless they wanna spend it on me.
SHe was wondering it she should adjust her gift. For the non-northeasterners out there, weddings are a whole different ball-game in NY and NJ. They can be very over-the-top and gifts are often expected accordingly.

“Checks and Balances”

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#97784 Apr 16, 2014
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>Like giving black's civil rights, women the right to vote, citizens the right to conceal carry? Those freedoms?

It was democrats who attempted to ban soft drinks, democrats who banned smoking, democrats who require me to wear my seatbelt... in the back seat, democrats who demand I must buy health insurance, democrats who want to limit how much I give to a candidate

How can you say it's the REPUBLICANS who want to limit freedoms and keep a straight face?
Today's Republican Party is not the same GOP that existed 60+ years ago.

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

#97785 Apr 16, 2014
edogxxx wrote:
How can you say it's the REPUBLICANS who want to limit freedoms and keep a straight face?
It must be because you don't have a uterus that you don't see the freedoms that republicans are trying to limit.

For a party that says they want smaller government and less restrictions on personal freedom, they sure seem to want to legislate every little thing that might go on in there.

“Checks and Balances”

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#97786 Apr 16, 2014
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Yes.

Whether you like it or not, many of US do things in life simply because "that's what you are supposed to do. That's just how its always been done"

Society has a generally accepted outline to life. Ie: the norm. Hearing 'here comes the bride' as this woman in a flowing white gown walks down the aisle is part of that.

I'm curious as to why you are so concerned with someone else blowing there own money in one day. Whether someone wants to spend all their money on charity or on hookers and blow, its not my money, so I don't care how other people spend their money...unless they wanna spend it on me.

I don't want to tell people what to spend their money on, but do like to learn the motivation behind decisions. Like I said, I'm not judging, I just don't understand.

There are many situations that I have never found myself in and can only imagine how I might react. That is very different from the thinking of one who is currently in that situation. I find it makes me less judgmental if I can somewhat comprehend a situation.

Like Stina said, weddings around here are out of control. Our bridal shower gifts are more like the gifts that the rest of the country gives for the actual wedding, and the typical wedding gift is $150-$200 cash, even from coworkers.

Today is my 10th wedding anniversary. We dated for 8 years before we got married, but did not live together (combine our lives) until a few months before the wedding (that is when we closed on our house). Our parents helped to pay for the wedding because our money was going to the house and they had saved up to give us that gift (and be able to invite all of their friends).

It was just a question. Plus, it was a change of subject.

Since: Mar 09

Hollywood, FL

#97787 Apr 16, 2014
squishymama wrote:
<quoted text>
Persephone is too busy getting her freak on with Hades to notice it's supposed to be spring.
Haha! Love this.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Melrose Park, IL

#97788 Apr 16, 2014
squishymama wrote:
<quoted text>
It must be because you don't have a uterus that you don't see the freedoms that republicans are trying to limit.
For a party that says they want smaller government and less restrictions on personal freedom, they sure seem to want to legislate every little thing that might go on in there.
How about you don't try to legislate my lungs and I won't legislate your uterus?

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#97789 Apr 16, 2014
Stina2 wrote:
<quoted text>
SHe was wondering it she should adjust her gift. For the non-northeasterners out there, weddings are a whole different ball-game in NY and NJ. They can be very over-the-top and gifts are often expected accordingly.
Not sure I understand how its different. I've never gone to a wedding without a gift. They are expected here as well. I've never considered how long a coupe lived together before marriage as a factor in determining their gift. In fact, I see that as more the norm. My wife moved in with me and my room mate for almost a year before we got a house and then moved into the house 1/2 a year before we got married. Off the top of my head I can think of no less than 3 couples that lived together for multiple years before getting married. Their nuptuals were met with the same congratulations and gift giving as any other wedding I've been to

Since: Mar 09

Hollywood, FL

#97790 Apr 16, 2014
ScarletandOlive wrote:
Ok, I need people to give me some new perspectives. I'm not trying to judge, just don't understand where some people are coming from.
If a couple is living together for several years and has completely commingled their lives, what is the purpose of having a formal, traditional wedding? Especially when there are already children involved, this kind of rubs me the wrong way. They are not combining their families, because that would have already been done over the years. It is not a big change in their lives, because at that point it is just legalizing the way they have already chosen to live. Do you change the gift you give in this situation?
Am I just jaded because I hate weddings and spending ridiculous amounts of money for one day?
First of all, I take "formal and traditional wedding" to differ from just getting married for legal or even religious reasons. I'm assuming pomp & circumstance, and showers, and parties, etc.

So with that in mind, MY answer to Part 1 of your question is: there either is no point (it's what you're "supposed to do" to echo someone else, I forget who), or they're greedy and want gifts, or it took them this long to realize that they do actually want all the fuss and ceremony and parties and don't mind spending the money.

My answer to Part 2 is: probably, yeah. I'd downscale and if they're not registered (which they really shouldn't be... tres tacky), maybe even just get a nice card. But it would depend on how close I was to them and also the potential backlash from the social circle. Unfortunately.

“I looked, and behold,”

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#97791 Apr 16, 2014
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>
Like giving black's civil rights, women the right to vote, citizens the right to conceal carry? Those freedoms?
It was democrats who attempted to ban soft drinks, democrats who banned smoking, democrats who require me to wear my seatbelt... in the back seat, democrats who demand I must buy health insurance, democrats who want to limit how much I give to a candidate
How can you say it's the REPUBLICANS who want to limit freedoms and keep a straight face?
It's people like you and your views and your influence on the republican party that turn a lot of people off from the party and that cause a lot of people to not even take anything they say seriously.. If the party adopted a more libertarian view, where folks are free to make their own choices on important social issues (and seat belts, soft drinks, smoking are not important social issues that inflame the passions of people ... especially cigarettes ... even folks who I know who smoke don't really care and can understand why people who don't ... don't wanna be around it ... it's a health issue ... maybe to you these things are really important, but not to a lot of people ... in contrast to a lot of people gay rights and woman's rights are important), a lot less people would be turned off from the republican party.

A big PR problem with the party too is racists and folks who take libertarian views to the absolute extreme, people like Ted Nuggent, tend to be republicans and they open their big mouths and it reflects poorly on the party as a whole. I can guarantee you every racist KKK member votes republican. People see that, and it plays right into the hands of democrats who love nothing more than to paint the entire party as sharing those thoughts, but that's not true. Most folks aren't like that. It's a small minority.

Yes, there are extremists in the democrat party, but the extremists in the republican party are much less palatable. Extremists in the democrat party are generally in favor of taking welfare and social programs to the extreme for the purpose of making the lives of poor people better, and while I strongly disagree that making people more and more dependent on government handouts is what is best for our country and feel that these people completely ignore the role individual decision making plays in people's lives, I find that far less distasteful than an extremist who espouses hatred for those who are not like him/her, advocates discrimination, and advocates imposition of their religious moral code onto others.

Republicans are losing because of people like you and people who are much worse than you being in the party and voting for the party. To a lot of people, you look like a backwards primitive caveman if you are so against two gay people getting married. It doesn't even concern you. Who cares if they get married? Why do you feel the need to tell two other grown consenting adults what kind of relationship they can or can't have? Republicans will lose the battle, anyway. All they are doing is standing in the way of inevitable and turning a lot of people off in the process.

Republicans would do so much better if they stuck to advocating being fiscally responsible (and that doesn't mean no new taxes on super rich people or giving rich people tax breaks that dwarf what everyone else gets and holding tax breaks to middle class and poor people hostage to tax breaks for the super wealthy) and took a more let freedom reign attitude, and not just when it comes to carrying a gun.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#97792 Apr 16, 2014
ScarletandOlive wrote:
<quoted text>
I don't want to tell people what to spend their money on, but do like to learn the motivation behind decisions. Like I said, I'm not judging, I just don't understand.
There are many situations that I have never found myself in and can only imagine how I might react. That is very different from the thinking of one who is currently in that situation. I find it makes me less judgmental if I can somewhat comprehend a situation.
Like Stina said, weddings around here are out of control. Our bridal shower gifts are more like the gifts that the rest of the country gives for the actual wedding, and the typical wedding gift is $150-$200 cash, even from coworkers.
Today is my 10th wedding anniversary. We dated for 8 years before we got married, but did not live together (combine our lives) until a few months before the wedding (that is when we closed on our house). Our parents helped to pay for the wedding because our money was going to the house and they had saved up to give us that gift (and be able to invite all of their friends).
It was just a question. Plus, it was a change of subject.
And i think I answere the question: that's just what you do. Societal expectations. Generally speaking, i don't think people opt for the courthouse wedding unless
-they can't afford the wedding they realy want
-they don't want to spend all that money on a big wedding

I think generally, many people have the big show cause...that's what you do. Not having it would be going off script.

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

#97793 Apr 16, 2014
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Not sure I understand how its different. I've never gone to a wedding without a gift. They are expected here as well. I've never considered how long a coupe lived together before marriage as a factor in determining their gift. In fact, I see that as more the norm. My wife moved in with me and my room mate for almost a year before we got a house and then moved into the house 1/2 a year before we got married. Off the top of my head I can think of no less than 3 couples that lived together for multiple years before getting married. Their nuptuals were met with the same congratulations and gift giving as any other wedding I've been to
I never gave it much thought till now, but I guess, if a couple has basically been "common law" married for a very long time (common law isn't recognized where I live, but I am jsut using that as an example of a REALLY long time, not just 2 or 3 years), I don't know that I'd shell out several hundred bucks in shower and wedding gifts. It probably SHOULDN'T be different, but somehow it is.

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