Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#85360 May 8, 2013
PEllen wrote:
<quoted text>The DeJesus girl was a good friend of the captor's daughter Arlene, so she would have thought she was getting in a car with a friend's father.
Any idea why so very little is being said about the 3rd captive, Michelle?
I read that she was treated more as someone who *wanted* to disappear, more like a runaway.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#85361 May 8, 2013
ScarletandOlive wrote:
<quoted text>
Maybe the adults can organize a bigger fundraiser, but I bet it means a lot to him that his schoolmates are showing their support in such visible ways. I hope the teachers are taking pictures of the kids wearing hats with him or blowing bubbles.
The money is important, but that friendship and support is invaluable to both him and his parents.
Brain cancer sucks. My Aunt died of it not long before I started posting on Topix. It was a long couple of years and very hard on those of us who were close to her (I was at the hospital or nursing home every day - she had no kids and I only had 1 by the time she died, so I had more free time than I do now).
That's a good idea. I would love to see a bigger fund raiser. I will mention something to my wife about it.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#85362 May 8, 2013
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
Some people aren't as street smart or haven't been taught, sadly. I agree it wasn't too mart to get into a car with someone she did not know.
Still, she's not to be blamed for getting locked away for that many years.
The men who did this and knew about it need to be locked up forever in a special hellish place.
No one deserves to be locked away for years, but she unfortunately does bear some of the blame, IMO. It's almost like the folks who win the darwin award. You just don't get into strangers cars. Everyone is taught at school that you don't trust strangers or get in their cars.

“It made sense at the time....”

Since: May 09

Schaumburg, IL

#85363 May 8, 2013
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
<quoted text>
I read that she was treated more as someone who *wanted* to disappear, more like a runaway.
and i think she was 20 at the time, so moer "adult" than "child". also, CNN says shen disappeared after losing custody of her kid, so that lends additional credence to teh theory of wanting to disappear...
Stina

Saint Petersburg, FL

#85364 May 8, 2013
Sublime1 wrote:
There's a boy who used to ride my boys bus who has brain cancer.
Their school is doing a fund raiser for him and everyday for $1 the kids get to do something special, like chew gum or wear a hat this week. It think that is nice, but I would like to give more than that.
I don't think brain cancer is something with a good survival rate. Very sad.:(
So just give more!

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#85365 May 8, 2013
Stina wrote:
<quoted text>
So just give more!
We are. When she told me today about it ... the first thing I asked was can't we give more? She said we could.

“Checks and Balances”

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#85366 May 8, 2013
Sublime1 wrote:
<quoted text>That's a good idea. I would love to see a bigger fund raiser. I will mention something to my wife about it.
Around here we do a lot of spaghetti dinner fundraisers. For non-political events they are usually held in one of the firehouses. The seniors will come out because they get a cheap meal (usually around $10 a plate, including bread, drink and donated dessert) and a place to gather and the families of school age kids don't have to worry about doing dishes. Ask at the high school if they have a service club of kids who would volunteer to be runners (bring the plates of spaghetti to the tables so that people aren't going into the kitchen) and make sure the tables are wiped down after people leave. Since this is for a kid, you may be able to find someone who is willing to donate their services as a face painter or clown who makes balloon animals.

It doesn't have to be a fancy meal, but a way for the community to get together for a cause. Also, if people have a person to give a check to (collecting money when they walk in the door), they are more likely to write out a bigger check.

Just throwing something out there.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#85367 May 8, 2013
ScarletandOlive wrote:
<quoted text>
Around here we do a lot of spaghetti dinner fundraisers. For non-political events they are usually held in one of the firehouses. The seniors will come out because they get a cheap meal (usually around $10 a plate, including bread, drink and donated dessert) and a place to gather and the families of school age kids don't have to worry about doing dishes. Ask at the high school if they have a service club of kids who would volunteer to be runners (bring the plates of spaghetti to the tables so that people aren't going into the kitchen) and make sure the tables are wiped down after people leave. Since this is for a kid, you may be able to find someone who is willing to donate their services as a face painter or clown who makes balloon animals.
It doesn't have to be a fancy meal, but a way for the community to get together for a cause. Also, if people have a person to give a check to (collecting money when they walk in the door), they are more likely to write out a bigger check.
Just throwing something out there.
I don't even know the boy or the family to organize such a thing. I wouldn't know where to start. We are sending more money with our boys than $1.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#85368 May 8, 2013
Sounds like a learning experience for you then. Sub the social event organizer. Google it, I am sure you can find a framework to use as a template.

I do think you will need to talk with a banker to set up an account specifically for the kids expenses though, and it keeps everything legit.
Sublime1 wrote:
<quoted text>
I don't even know the boy or the family to organize such a thing. I wouldn't know where to start. We are sending more money with our boys than $1.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#85369 May 8, 2013
And I know there are websites you can create for online donations. My crazy cat lady neighbor contributes to various rescue groups that way.
Sublime1 wrote:
<quoted text>
I don't even know the boy or the family to organize such a thing. I wouldn't know where to start. We are sending more money with our boys than $1.

“What's it to ya?”

Since: Mar 09

Location hidden

#85370 May 8, 2013
RACE wrote:
And I know there are websites you can create for online donations. My crazy cat lady neighbor contributes to various rescue groups that way.
<quoted text>
http://mashable.com/2011/03/14/social-good-fu...

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#85371 May 8, 2013
WOW! Pretty amazing!
Mimi Seattle wrote:

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#85372 May 8, 2013
RACE wrote:
<quoted text>Sounds like a learning experience for you then. Sub the social event organizer. Google it, I am sure you can find a framework to use as a template.

I do think you will need to talk with a banker to set up an account specifically for the kids expenses though, and it keeps everything legit.
I'm actually not much of an organizer. I never have been.

I also think my plate and Bambi's plate are pretty full. I'll be happy to donate $$, but we have a lot going on with 3 boys, one with special needs, both of us working and Bambi just finishing her class.

It's been a crazy year so far for us and Bambi is at her limit.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#85373 May 8, 2013
I wouldn't organize anything unless I were closely related to the kid or he was a close friend's kid.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#85374 May 8, 2013
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
I wouldn't organize anything unless I were closely related to the kid or he was a close friend's kid.
I agree. I don't even know the situation with the boy, the financial situation of the family, and if the level of medical insurance, such that I would know if there is or isn't a big need for fund raising. That usually something done by a person who is more aware of the families situation ... not a complete stranger.

I have to play tooth fairy tonight, lol.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#85375 May 8, 2013
Sublime1 wrote:
<quoted text>
No one deserves to be locked away for years, but she unfortunately does bear some of the blame, IMO. It's almost like the folks who win the darwin award. You just don't get into strangers cars. Everyone is taught at school that you don't trust strangers or get in their cars.
I guess since the captures were so awful I really dislike blaming the victims. Yes, they made a very poor decision but at this point they more than paid their price.

I really also don't like the sense of safety this leaves people. What I am talking about is when people say well she kid x, y and z and she shouldn't have, that's why that happened. It could never happen to me or my family! Well, kit could happen to anyone. People have off days, do things they normally wouldn't do, trust someone they shouldn't -- it's better to remind people of what they should and should not do than to blame the victim. Also, some people are overpowered. We don't know the full story on all three yet. Whatever the story, it's not good.

I'm not saying you're heaping blame (b/c you don't seem that you are); but that's my thought process on it.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#85376 May 8, 2013
Toj wrote:
Well, kit could happen to anyone. People have off days, do things they normally wouldn't do, trust someone they shouldn't
ie: they do something stupid.
Toj wrote:
-- it's better to remind people of what they should and should not do than to blame the victim.
Look, Sub's not running up to her and yelling in her face that she was stupid and its her fault, but if we're going to intelligently discuss this, the fact is, she got in a stranger's van willingly. It was stupid. I'm sure she's beaten herself up over and over during the last 10 years for how stupid she was to do that. What happened to her was terrible and you feel so bad for her that you would prefer we ignore her role in her abduction.

That's not blaming the victim. That's pointing out that when you do stupid things and put yourself in un-necessary danger, bad things are more likely to happen.

Oh, and as far as not being street smart and not being taught, I call bullshit. By the time you're 17, don't talk to strangers has been repeated to you forever, if not by parent's, definitely by school safety programs.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#85377 May 8, 2013
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
I guess since the captures were so awful I really dislike blaming the victims. Yes, they made a very poor decision but at this point they more than paid their price.
She was 14. I'm not going to say she bears any responsibility for this at all.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#85378 May 8, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>
ie: they do something stupid.
<quoted text>
Look, Sub's not running up to her and yelling in her face that she was stupid and its her fault, but if we're going to intelligently discuss this, the fact is, she got in a stranger's van willingly. It was stupid. I'm sure she's beaten herself up over and over during the last 10 years for how stupid she was to do that. What happened to her was terrible and you feel so bad for her that you would prefer we ignore her role in her abduction.
That's not blaming the victim. That's pointing out that when you do stupid things and put yourself in un-necessary danger, bad things are more likely to happen.
Oh, and as far as not being street smart and not being taught, I call bullshit. By the time you're 17, don't talk to strangers has been repeated to you forever, if not by parent's, definitely by school safety programs.
Okay, now I'm back on this side.

And before I get sucked into a debate on something in one of our other threads, I'm off to bed. see you all tomorrow.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#85379 May 8, 2013

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