“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#79874 Feb 8, 2013
Yes I did, but I was 5 or 6 not 3 or 4. Maybe I was just a late bloomer.
PEllen wrote:
<quoted text>
Dusagree. Pre0schoool is exactly when they are curious about each other's bodies but not in a salacious sexual way. Did you nevr play doctor?( no leers)
dahgts

Chicago, IL

#79875 Feb 8, 2013
PEllen wrote:
<quoted text>
You are local- you remember the case in the papers around Harvey, where the mom, bf and 5 year old were in the car. Mom was driving and was pulled over for soemthing and was arrested. Cop told mom to have bf drive. Mom says he's intoxicated. Cop says bf drives. 2 miles later bf gets in accident and 5 year old dies.
Cops are being (rightfully) sued and their pictures have been plastered on teh Trib and Sun Times website.
I just want to give discredit where it's due. That was one of Chicago Heights' "finest". I think there's a lawsuit by the mother.
Neither of the adults are prizes.

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79876 Feb 8, 2013
I remember boys & girls showing each other their junk during naptime when I was four. But there was no touching and certainly no "oral sex."

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79877 Feb 8, 2013
At that age, that stuff was just to pee out of. No way I'm putting my mouth on it.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#79878 Feb 8, 2013
squishymama wrote:
http://www.cnn.com/2013/02/07/ health/church-preschool-child- development/index.html?hpt=hp_ t2
I don't even know what to say to this.
I'm not that willing to believe it so easily. There was a day care center that was in the middle of a child/sex/satan worshipping scandale a couple of decades ago, and it turns out, the day care owners/workers did not do ANY of it. It was The Crucible all over again.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#79879 Feb 8, 2013
j_m_w wrote:
At that age, that stuff was just to pee out of. No way I'm putting my mouth on it.
No doubt!

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#79880 Feb 8, 2013
The McMartin child sex abuse scandal:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/McMartin_prescho...

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#79881 Feb 8, 2013
also, I am suspect if these kids allegedly performed these acts only in day care and not at home. Because kids that age (3-4) don't really have boundaries as to what they can do at home and waht they can do elsewhere.

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79882 Feb 8, 2013
I'm sure some, if not most or all, of you are sick of me and my problems. But since in this forum, you can choose to read or scroll by or judge me with a silly icon, too bad... here goes. Fair warning for those who DON'T want to hear it anymore.

I'm climbing the walls with anger and despair. Unless I have something to really concentrate on, my own mind is my worst enemy. Work helps a little but only if it's a problem to solve - the routine stuff doesn't keep my mind off of the whole situation with Jasper.

People keep saying this is normal, etc. but I haven't been through enough relationships ending to know firsthand. I can barely function, and can only sleep with sominex. I pulled myself through the initial pain last fall by staying busy, but my energy is spent and I don't feel like I have it in me to start all over again.

Of course, back then I was caught up in A's drama with the boyfriend (who is currently weaseling himself back into the picture, but I can't and won't consume myself with that... unless it's a needed distraction?). I can't spend all my time with my close friends dumping on them, and people keep asking me if I'm okay because I "look sad." I feel like I should be walking around dripping blood, how visible my hurt is.

I've taken a first step toward finding a professional to talk to and it feels good - as good as anything feels right now - to take action. But in the meantime, I'm miserable. And everywhere I look at home, it's memories. Different apartment but all the same stuff.

Anyway... I don't really know what I'm trying to accomplish by telling you guys this. It's just an outlet, I guess. And I really do feel bad for coming across so melodramatic. It's not like anyone died.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#79883 Feb 8, 2013
I don't have any advice for you, jmw! Just commisseration. You seem to know that this is more "down in the dumps" than you've experienced in the past, so I'm glad you're going to talk to someone about it, someone who may be able to help you peek through the fog.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#79884 Feb 8, 2013
From Carolyn Hax's live chat:

In the in box recently (I've condensed a bit): Email #1 from "Bob" to two dozen people, friends and relatives alike: Help! Someone talk some sense into my wife, I just found out she's having an affair with my son's soccer coach. Email #2 about an hour later: Oops, that was dumb. Never mind, forget I said anything, don't forward my email or repeat this, we're going to handle this privately, sorry to bother you. Email #3 from "Mary" (Bob's wife) next day: "Well, we all make mistakes. But *I* won't go on about our marriage problems (which are many and long-standing) in public like *some* people."

***

Wow.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

United States

#79885 Feb 8, 2013
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
<quoted text>
I'm not that willing to believe it so easily.
I'm with you. I don't see 4 and 5 yr olds going around blowing each other with such reckless abandon. It's like the people who claim 10 and 11 yr olds are non-stop, sex-crazed, sex-machines.

“It made sense at the time....”

Since: May 09

Schaumburg, IL

#79886 Feb 8, 2013
JMW - i'm bettign that just by finding and starting with a professional to help you out, you'll start making progress... about 15 months ago i was in a similar quandry, but about getting wound up at work, thinking it was ADD/ADHD. i would wake up at 2 am and stay awake for a couple of hours (thank god for Nick at Nite!). teh day i made an appointmetn, i started feeling less tightly wound. I was given things to start doing differently when i recognized certain patterns developing, and that helps a lot.

To contrast with the Amby letter today about teh 20 YO manic depressive who isnt' treating, you ARE recognizing that you need to do something else, adn you WILL do it!=-) Good for you!!

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79887 Feb 8, 2013
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
I don't have any advice for you, jmw! Just commisseration. You seem to know that this is more "down in the dumps" than you've experienced in the past, so I'm glad you're going to talk to someone about it, someone who may be able to help you peek through the fog.
Thank you. Maybe I should copy & paste my post into Carolyn's chat?
;)

“Fort Kickass”

Since: Sep 09

Bloomington, IL

#79888 Feb 8, 2013
j_m_w wrote:
I'm sure some, if not most or all, of you are sick of me and my problems. But since in this forum, you can choose to read or scroll by or judge me with a silly icon, too bad... here goes. Fair warning for those who DON'T want to hear it anymore.
I'm climbing the walls with anger and despair. Unless I have something to really concentrate on, my own mind is my worst enemy. Work helps a little but only if it's a problem to solve - the routine stuff doesn't keep my mind off of the whole situation with Jasper.
People keep saying this is normal, etc. but I haven't been through enough relationships ending to know firsthand. I can barely function, and can only sleep with sominex. I pulled myself through the initial pain last fall by staying busy, but my energy is spent and I don't feel like I have it in me to start all over again.
Of course, back then I was caught up in A's drama with the boyfriend (who is currently weaseling himself back into the picture, but I can't and won't consume myself with that... unless it's a needed distraction?). I can't spend all my time with my close friends dumping on them, and people keep asking me if I'm okay because I "look sad." I feel like I should be walking around dripping blood, how visible my hurt is.
I've taken a first step toward finding a professional to talk to and it feels good - as good as anything feels right now - to take action. But in the meantime, I'm miserable. And everywhere I look at home, it's memories. Different apartment but all the same stuff.
Anyway... I don't really know what I'm trying to accomplish by telling you guys this. It's just an outlet, I guess. And I really do feel bad for coming across so melodramatic. It's not like anyone died.
Internet hug. It *will* get better, I promise you. You're doing the right thing, getting a shrink. They can suggest ways to deal with things and it helps to have a neutral party to talk to. Might even get you on antidepressants, which, I gotta say, have made a world of difference in my life. In the meantime, get out and exercise. Make a music playlist of upbeat songs and walk your dogs until their legs fall off. And get some sun. There's none here, it's all grey and brown and cold.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#79889 Feb 8, 2013
j_m_w wrote:
<quoted text>
Thank you. Maybe I should copy & paste my post into Carolyn's chat?
;)
Her chat is almost over, so save it for next Friday! it's more likely to get in then.
PEllen

Chicago, IL

#79890 Feb 8, 2013
dahgts wrote:
<quoted text>
I just want to give discredit where it's due. That was one of Chicago Heights' "finest". I think there's a lawsuit by the mother.
Neither of the adults are prizes.
My apologies to Harvey

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

#79891 Feb 8, 2013
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>
I'm with you. I don't see 4 and 5 yr olds going around blowing each other with such reckless abandon.
They're not. It's one child that is the instigator. I'm sure s/he has seen or, even worse, been involved with something at home.
edogxxx wrote:
It's like the people who claim 10 and 11 yr olds are non-stop, sex-crazed, sex-machines.
You don't remember being 10-11, do you?

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79892 Feb 8, 2013
Aisle Sitter wrote:
JMW - i'm bettign that just by finding and starting with a professional to help you out, you'll start making progress... about 15 months ago i was in a similar quandry, but about getting wound up at work, thinking it was ADD/ADHD. i would wake up at 2 am and stay awake for a couple of hours (thank god for Nick at Nite!). teh day i made an appointmetn, i started feeling less tightly wound. I was given things to start doing differently when i recognized certain patterns developing, and that helps a lot.
To contrast with the Amby letter today about teh 20 YO manic depressive who isnt' treating, you ARE recognizing that you need to do something else, adn you WILL do it!=-) Good for you!!
Thanks. I do know I need to do something, and I do know intellectually that it's not the end of the world. Just need to convince my heart of that.

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

#79893 Feb 8, 2013
jmw, Matilda gave the advice that I was going to give.

Start excersizing a lot. It will take your mind off stuff, wear you out so you can sleep, and make you a hottie for the next guy.

It's a win-win-win!

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