Since: Mar 09

Lake Worth, FL

#79669 Feb 5, 2013
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
Good morning! Today is my 45th birthday! I'm wearing super cute new black shoes, a cute new top, a new leather jacket (Dress Barn for the win!), and my five boxes of thin mints (Girl Scouts!) just got delivered to my desk.

LIfe is good.

Carry on.
Happy Birthday!
:)

“bELieve”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#79670 Feb 5, 2013
Matilda77 wrote:
<quoted text>"I always wanted children and grandchildren and now itÂ’s too late in life for me."

No it's not. Dump your old second wife and get some young tail.
My response to him would be "You are an a$$. You have kids. They may not carry your genes, but you raised them and you are the only father they have ever known. Now, because you have bad taste in women, you have told them that those years mean nothing to you and furthermore you need to be compensated for the time and money that you spent on your children. F you. You had your chance to show people what a real father is and you blew it. Very few people get second chances in life and you haven't shown that you deserve any."

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

United States

#79671 Feb 5, 2013
Jess in NJ wrote:
<quoted text>
My response to him would be "You are an a$$. You have kids. They may not carry your genes, but you raised them and you are the only father they have ever known. Now, because you have bad taste in women, you have told them that those years mean nothing to you and furthermore you need to be compensated for the time and money that you spent on your children. F you. You had your chance to show people what a real father is and you blew it. Very few people get second chances in life and you haven't shown that you deserve any."
Unless I misread the article, I thought it was the kids who wanted nothing to do with *him*? That's why he feels abandoned and wanted his child support back? In which case I would agree with him. And Mattie has a good point, unlike you btches, men can have kids up untill the day they die (ha ha!)

And happy bday angela. It's my friend's birthday too.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

United States

#79672 Feb 5, 2013
Jldean wrote:
<quoted text>
Go slam a revolving door and then say everything is possible :)
It can happen. I was trapped in one of those once.

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

#79673 Feb 5, 2013
Happy Birthday Angela!

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#79674 Feb 5, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Granted, I read the article last night and really don't recall the details, but what makes him seem like a doormat? He did not even have an inkling that they were not his kids till well after they were divorced. I don't recall the article saying they had any problems early in in their marriage or anything to make him question her fidelity. So what was it that you read that makes him seem like a door mat?
This:

But by 2004 the marriage was struggling. Mr Rodwell explained:‘Helen was disappearing for several days without telling me where she was going. I only found out from used train and coach tickets I discovered.

‘I would collect the children from school as usual and walk into the house and it would be empty with no note or anything. Helen would go to places such as Newcastle or Manchester, and if I asked why she had gone there she would say,“Nothing to do with you.”&#8201;’

****

My wife wouldn't be making "multiple" trips to places like Newcastle or Manchester, without telling me why she was going to be gone from our family for several days. It would happen one time and one time, only. I wouldn't be looking at used train tickets either ... wouldn't matter to me where she went ... I wouldn't care if she disappeared to go meet the Pope for a few days. If my wife pulled that shyte, the door locks would be changed.

I firmly believe that most men (not all) who have this shyte happen to them, lost their man card a long time ago. There is probably a long history of her treating him like garbage to go along with having children with other men.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#79675 Feb 5, 2013
Thanks, folks!:)

***

Right, Sub. My spouse disappears for days with no explanation? I'm going to a divorce attorney that week.

Since: Feb 08

Location hidden

#79676 Feb 5, 2013
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
Thanks, folks!
Re: the guy whose wife cheated: We don't know the gory details, really, but his 20yo daughter dumped him over the testing...
I guess I just don't think he ever should have done the DNA testing, and he should have just had the attitude, "These are my kids, I don't care what anyone else says." And the language he uses after this all has happened is like, "I don't have kids anymore."
I just think he detached from the kids he raised very quickly.
They cut off contact AFTER he got the testing done. You're right that he should have never done the testing.
I know guys who've been in this spot, but their attitude when people where spreading rumours about a couple of them not being theirs biologically were met with 'eff you, they're mine, I don't care how they got started'. They never got DNA tested, and that's why they still have loving relationships with the kids.

Have a great birthday, Red!

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#79677 Feb 5, 2013
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
Thanks, folks!
Re: the guy whose wife cheated: We don't know the gory details, really, but his 20yo daughter dumped him over the testing...
I guess I just don't think he ever should have done the DNA testing, and he should have just had the attitude, "These are my kids, I don't care what anyone else says." And the language he uses after this all has happened is like, "I don't have kids anymore."
I just think he detached from the kids he raised very quickly.
Following the results, the children cut off all contact with him. He claims his ex-wife turned them against him.

‘I treated them both as if they were my own. I was there at their births, went to their Nativity plays and helped them with school homework.
‘I can’t stop thinking about the children as they were my life.
‘The children were the most important people in my life, and now they have gone.

This does not sound like the words of someone who detached quickly. He says he does not have kids anymore because they have disowned him. Its the truth. Something he feels the mother caused. It could be argued that he caused it with the testing, but I don't buy for a second that the mother did not influence the children living under her roof. Cheated on him while married. Duped him into raising the children of 2 other me. Showed no remorse when confronted with the truth. So you have a pissed off decietful ex who now has to move out of their marital home and sell it to split the proceeds. She gets no more "maintenance". You bet your ass she bad moutheed him to the kids and killed the relationship.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#79678 Feb 5, 2013
Sublime1 wrote:
<quoted text>
This:
But by 2004 the marriage was struggling. Mr Rodwell explained:‘Helen was disappearing for several days without telling me where she was going. I only found out from used train and coach tickets I discovered.
‘I would collect the children from school as usual and walk into the house and it would be empty with no note or anything. Helen would go to places such as Newcastle or Manchester, and if I asked why she had gone there she would say,“Nothing to do with you.”&#8201;’
****
My wife wouldn't be making "multiple" trips to places like Newcastle or Manchester, without telling me why she was going to be gone from our family for several days. It would happen one time and one time, only. I wouldn't be looking at used train tickets either ... wouldn't matter to me where she went ... I wouldn't care if she disappeared to go meet the Pope for a few days. If my wife pulled that shyte, the door locks would be changed.
I firmly believe that most men (not all) who have this shyte happen to them, lost their man card a long time ago. There is probably a long history of her treating him like garbage to go along with having children with other men.
Article says that happened in 2004. And they got divorced in 2004. Does not seem to me like he put up with it. Maybe he did not handle it the exact same way you would have, but it certainly does not scream doormat. He took care of the problem.

“bELieve”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#79680 Feb 5, 2013
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>Unless I misread the article, I thought it was the kids who wanted nothing to do with *him*? That's why he feels abandoned and wanted his child support back? In which case I would agree with him. And Mattie has a good point, unlike you btches, men can have kids up untill the day they die (ha ha!)

And happy bday angela. It's my friend's birthday too.
If my father was questioning whether he was really my "father" I would tell him to shove it, too. He needs to grow up.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#79681 Feb 5, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
His ex-wife is no prize. I think she should get in trouble for fraud, personally. I wouldn't put it that "women are so deceitful" as much some people can be deceitful.

Here's my problem, though. I understand the man wanting to know but I wonder if there wasn't a better way to do it. In such a public way his kids found out, too. I doubt those kids knew. The only father they probably knew was him and for all intent and purposes he was their father.

Sad all around.

“bELieve”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#79682 Feb 5, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Following the results, the children cut off all contact with him. He claims his ex-wife turned them against him.

‘I treated them both as if they were my own. I was there at their births, went to their Nativity plays and helped them with school homework.
‘I can’t stop thinking about the children as they were my life.
‘The children were the most important people in my life, and now they have gone.

.
"[A]s if they were my own"?! F that. They are his (at least that would be a real Father's mindset). A real Father never stops fighting for his kids.

This douche wants people to feel sorry for him, but I think that he and the ex deserved each other. I feel bad for the kids (no matter how old they are now).

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

United States

#79683 Feb 5, 2013
Jess in NJ wrote:
<quoted text>
If my father was questioning whether he was really my "father" I would tell him to shove it, too. He needs to grow up.
People have a right to know the truth. You're blaming him for the actions of his wife.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#79684 Feb 5, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>
Following the results, the children cut off all contact with him. He claims his ex-wife turned them against him.
‘I treated them both as if they were my own. I was there at their births, went to their Nativity plays and helped them with school homework.
‘I can’t stop thinking about the children as they were my life.
‘The children were the most important people in my life, and now they have gone.
This does not sound like the words of someone who detached quickly. He says he does not have kids anymore because they have disowned him. Its the truth. Something he feels the mother caused. It could be argued that he caused it with the testing, but I don't buy for a second that the mother did not influence the children living under her roof. Cheated on him while married. Duped him into raising the children of 2 other me. Showed no remorse when confronted with the truth. So you have a pissed off decietful ex who now has to move out of their marital home and sell it to split the proceeds. She gets no more "maintenance". You bet your ass she bad moutheed him to the kids and killed the relationship.
She probably did -- most likely. I personally have no doubt. BUT, I think once he wanted proof that those were his children, that's when the kids dumped him.

Kids need unconditional love and once he questioned whether he was their father, I'm sure those kids took it as he wanted NOT to be the father. That's probably how it felt to them.

Not saying that was the reality, I'm saying that's how those kids probably felt.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#79685 Feb 5, 2013
Jess in NJ wrote:
<quoted text>
"[A]s if they were my own"?! F that. They are his (at least that would be a real Father's mindset). A real Father never stops fighting for his kids.
This douche wants people to feel sorry for him, but I think that he and the ex deserved each other. I feel bad for the kids (no matter how old they are now).
Jess, I agree. 100%.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#79686 Feb 5, 2013
I'd be suspicious that Nick's youngest isn't his (because the wife was cheating throughout the marriage, including while pregnant), but the kid looks just like Nick's brother (and no, brother didn't sleep with the woman).

“bELieve”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#79687 Feb 5, 2013
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>People have a right to know the truth. You're blaming him for the actions of his wife.
Nope. Biology does not make a parent.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#79688 Feb 5, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Article says that happened in 2004. And they got divorced in 2004. Does not seem to me like he put up with it. Maybe he did not handle it the exact same way you would have, but it certainly does not scream doormat. He took care of the problem.
Screams doormat to me. This happened multiple times? As I said it would happen one time to me. There wouldn’t even be the possibility for it to happen a second time. We can be pretty darn sure that her disappearing was the culmination of a lot of blatantly disrespectful behavior. It would have never even gotten to the point where a woman could do that to me. She'd have been looooong gone. A woman should add to your life, not subtract from it.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#79689 Feb 5, 2013
Jess in NJ wrote:
<quoted text>
Nope. Biology does not make a parent.
??? So a man has no right to know if he actually fathered the children he raised? Lets back up to 1992. If he had suspicions before the child was born, would you have a problem with him getting a DNA test? Or would you at that point say, "if he does not trust his wife they should not be together"? The idea that he is an ass for wanting to know the truth is absurd. If, after finding out the truth, he disowned the kids, then yes, I'd agree, he's an ass. But that's not how this story played out. For some reason, you feel he has no right to ask the question.

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