Topix Chitown Regulars

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79075 Jan 25, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Its not so much an evaluation, but a progression. They start each day on green. And, as the day progresses, if they behave poorly, their color moves to yellow. As the bad behavior continues, the color ranking drops.
I hear this from all my friends with kids. They start at green and it's on them to keep it that way.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#79076 Jan 25, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
\

I'd tap that!

“bELieve”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#79077 Jan 25, 2013
j_m_w wrote:
<quoted text>I hear this from all my friends with kids. They start at green and it's on them to keep it that way.
I don't always agree with some of the things that cause the teacher to move the kids out of green. Ry was moved into yellow last week because he had two chair legs off the floor. Seriously, that's a moveable offense?

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#79078 Jan 25, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
SUBLIME LENGTH POST FOLLOWS
==========
OK, imaginary peeps. I don't usually come here seeking answers, but instead to be entertained and to share my brilliance with the rest of you. But seeing as how I went to the well today with the debt collector question, I figured I might as well go back to the well and solicit opinions, analysis, and advice from the arm chair child psychologists.
It could be a subject he isn't doing well at school that is affecting him. He could be getting teased at school and his behavior is showing the affects. It could be you and your wife have been more busier than usual (it seems you are really good parents but everyone has periods of super busy). Is anyone in the family ill?

If this is a new behavior -- at 6 they have soooooooooo much (for a kid) that is new.

I'd try sports. If he likes a sport that will keep him busy AND there are rules in sports AND if you misbehave then you can't play in the game (but never take practice away).

I dunno. I'd try sports. With boys that can cure a whole host of things (as long as the coach is good and it's something they like). I'd do soccer -- there is indoor soccer clubs and outdoor soccer clubs. But there's also hockey. Baseball usually doesn't have a long season, but you can mix baseball, basketball, etc.

Don't over-think so much. You won't know what the problem is unless he tells you and some kids don't even understand what the problem is themselves. So keep him busy for him to get on the right path.

Hope this helps.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#79079 Jan 25, 2013
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Its not so much an evaluation, but a progression. They start each day on green. And, as the day progresses, if they behave poorly, their color moves to yellow. As the bad behavior continues, the color ranking drops.
Tonka -- it might be the teacher, too. Your kid might be talkative and energetic and the teacher doesn't know how to calm the kids down except to give them a color. Boys are difficult to contain in school until they're about the 5th grade. They get better then. Their brains are not real good at self control and as long as he's not doing horrible, I wouldn't worry but yet still continue with your rules. Don't expect him NOT to get into small trouble. He's a boy. He has to learn, you're showing him the way.

:) Tire him out with sports. Man -- I'm a broken record!!!

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

United States

#79080 Jan 25, 2013
ABC reports only 30 Burmese pythons have been killed so far in the "python hunt" in the everglades. There are two weeks left.

GO PYTHONS!

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

#79081 Jan 25, 2013
A few thoughts for Tonka:

The food allergy thing occured to me too. Wheat or dairy allergies were my first thought.

My sister recommended 123 Magic when we were having issues with Nunu. It was somewhat helpful, but both parents have to read it (or watch the DVD) in order for it to really work. They talk about Stop Behaviors (hitting a sib) and Start Behaviors (getting ready for school) and techniques for both.

But the thing that has really worked the best for us (an idea I got from 123 Magic) is using money for both types of behavior. They both have chores they do at the MIL's house and she pays them weekly if they perform the chores to her satisfaction. Then since I know they have money, I can say things like "If I have to pick up your dirty clothes, I'm going to charge you $1." Boy, do they ever scurry to do whatever when they hear that. Maybe you could pay him for good behavior; some amount for being good at school and some for at home.

Good luck. It's rough when you *know* they're good kids and smart enough to do whatever they put their mind to. It's just they're putting their minds to being naughty!

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#79083 Jan 25, 2013

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#79084 Jan 25, 2013

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79085 Jan 25, 2013
Thanks Toj! I was starving for some entertainment. My brain is already in weekend mode.:)

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79086 Jan 25, 2013
Toj wrote:
Friend with jerky boyfriend letter: I'm about to sprain my wrist patting myself on the back for figuring this stuff out on my own! And I feel validated that I came to the same conclusions that Carolyn is offering.

Not that you guys weren't a HUGE help, of course.
:)

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#79087 Jan 25, 2013
j_m_w wrote:
<quoted text>
Friend with jerky boyfriend letter: I'm about to sprain my wrist patting myself on the back for figuring this stuff out on my own! And I feel validated that I came to the same conclusions that Carolyn is offering.
Not that you guys weren't a HUGE help, of course.
:)
You are just smart is all!

Did you see the letter on Hax about a son who came out to his mother and how it was humiliating to her? What a witch!

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79088 Jan 25, 2013
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
You are just smart is all!
Did you see the letter on Hax about a son who came out to his mother and how it was humiliating to her? What a witch!
I know.
:(

I liked the follow-up letter from the adult gay man who shared his coming out experience.

The LW who considers a cruise to be "vacation hell" is baffling me. I can't wait to see if she answers Carolyn ("Have you been on a cruise?").

“bELieve”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#79089 Jan 25, 2013
Has anyone here seen Ron White live recently? I like his stuff when he was doing the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, but am wondering if he is worth $40-$50 tix 30 mins away.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

United States

#79090 Jan 25, 2013
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
You are just smart is all!
Did you see the letter on Hax about a son who came out to his mother and how it was humiliating to her? What a witch!
What about the guy who was "dissapointed" his son came out? The commentors were saying "well, he should be more open-minded."

I don't think that's fair. So because you're not thrilled about your son being gay and you don't shout woo hoo and do backflips, you're close-minded? Or even worse, a homophobe?

It's exactly that type of attitude that makes gay supporters the close-minded ones, and bigots, and intolerant.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#79091 Jan 25, 2013
Still seems like a lot of pressure for a 6yr old.
Maybe they should do 1/2 the day, then give them the other half to improve upon it. Maybe he figures that if he is already in the red by lunch, whats the point?
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Its not so much an evaluation, but a progression. They start each day on green. And, as the day progresses, if they behave poorly, their color moves to yellow. As the bad behavior continues, the color ranking drops.

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#79092 Jan 25, 2013
RACE wrote:
Maybe he figures that if he is already in the red by lunch, whats the point?
<quoted text>
I have days like that as an adult.
;)

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#79093 Jan 25, 2013
word!
j_m_w wrote:
<quoted text>
I have days like that as an adult.
;)

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#79094 Jan 25, 2013
j_m_w wrote:
<quoted text>
Friend with jerky boyfriend letter: I'm about to sprain my wrist patting myself on the back for figuring this stuff out on my own! And I feel validated that I came to the same conclusions that Carolyn is offering.
Not that you guys weren't a HUGE help, of course.
:)
Hax precursor on gay kids: I think she's nuts. While we as a society have reached a point where parents are accepting of their children if it turns out they are gay, I do not buy for a second that anyone other than some lunatic fringe is daydreaming in a positive way that theor kid might grow up to be gay. Would I accept and love my kids if they were? Sure, but it would certainly be a disappointing blow. One that I would internalize and immediately get over. I don't buy that there are any heterosexual dads or dads to be fantasizing about their boy becoming the next Dan Savage, Ricky Martin, Nathan Lane, or Lance Bass.

LW1: This chick is nuts. She has not even kissed him yet and she's trying to figure out how to change him? I would not even entertain the suggestion coming from someone I had not even been on a date with.

Lw2: let it lie.

Lw3: You're an idiot. She's getting a hall pass from work and wants to spend time with you and that's a bad thing? Cpme back when you have an actual problem asshole.

lw gay letter: hax spot on with letter response

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#79095 Jan 25, 2013
hax:

What to do when friend seems to prefer one child over another?

I found it interesting how LW tried so hard to no use any gender specific pronouns(he/she) and instead kept saying Friend. My observation, which has nothing to do with the letter, this is a woman.

No man would feel the need to announce "We both work full-time" when talking about a friend.

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