Topix Chitown Regulars

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

#77975 Dec 31, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>I interpreted non-single to mean she had a boyfriend, not a husband. And I'll disagree.
Perhaps the longer you've been married, the greater chance you have of working through your spouse making out with someone, but that is a major affront. To me, that's just a few steps away from having sex. We read all sorts of nonsense in these letters about people having "emotional affairs". F that. Making out with someone is way worse in my book.
Correct, they were dating for about a year - NOT married.

And I agree. It's a deal-breaker. She knows she effed up and feels terrible.

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

#77976 Dec 31, 2012
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
<quoted text>
WHy would you go home with a guy from the bar except to have sex with him? I never went home just to make out.
First of all, I believe her - why would she lie to me?

Second, they did not make out AT the bar or in front of me anywhere. The guy lives in the same building as me and I was SHOCKED when she did not get off the elevator with me and stayed with him.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#77977 Dec 31, 2012
RACE wrote:
Why are women so difficult?
I was planning on having a nice evening to myself, large fire to welcome in the new year...
Texted a female friend, "So, whats your plans for tonight?"
Texts back "was supposed to go to dinner, but feeling sick"
Text back "Thats terrible, hope you feel better. If you want you can come over and share your germs"
30 minutes later get a text from another female.
"coming up tonight, wanna play cards and have drinks?"
Wait for text back from first female....
Nothing, so I send her a text saying that I have to begg off, got another invite.
She texts back "gee thanks"
Im like WTF? So text back "Would you rather I be with you? You gave me no indication, and you had other plans."
What the heck?
bitches be crazy.

But you knew that.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#77978 Dec 31, 2012
j_m_w wrote:
<quoted text>
First of all, I believe her - why would she lie to me?
Second, they did not make out AT the bar or in front of me anywhere. The guy lives in the same building as me and I was SHOCKED when she did not get off the elevator with me and stayed with him.
oh, i believe her, too, just via you. That was good enough for me. I just wouldn't bother going home with a guy if all I had in mind was making out. ;)

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#77979 Dec 31, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Hmmm. Yuck factor on 72 year old dude?
Just to clarify, do you think your typical 50 something year old woman would have to get over a yuck factor to date someone that looked like...
Harrison Ford?
Al Pacino?
James Brolin?
Jimmy Cann?
Sam Elliot?
Chuck Norris?
Have you SEEN James Brolin lately?:)

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#77980 Dec 31, 2012
Why do you think she did it? Do you think her relationship was having trouble/wasn't a good fit after getting to know each other for a year?

Did her boyfriend find out and he broke up with her, or she took her behavior as a sign that her boyfriend isn't who she should be with, and she ended things?

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#77981 Dec 31, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Hmmm. Yuck factor on 72 year old dude?
Just to clarify, do you think your typical 50 something year old woman would have to get over a yuck factor to date someone that looked like...
Harrison Ford?
Al Pacino?
James Brolin?
Jimmy Cann?
Sam Elliot?
Chuck Norris?
I would be willing to date a few of them. But believe me, the average 70yo guy going after women 20 years younger via match.com are NOT in the Harrison Ford/James Brolin category. THey DO tend to be men who haven't aged well and aren't accepting that they'll be more likely to get a woman near their own age.

ONline dating: The older the guy, the greater the age gap he wants in a date.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#77982 Dec 31, 2012
RACE wrote:
Why are women so difficult?
I was planning on having a nice evening to myself, large fire to welcome in the new year...
Texted a female friend, "So, whats your plans for tonight?"
Texts back "was supposed to go to dinner, but feeling sick"
Text back "Thats terrible, hope you feel better. If you want you can come over and share your germs"
30 minutes later get a text from another female.
"coming up tonight, wanna play cards and have drinks?"
Wait for text back from first female....
Nothing, so I send her a text saying that I have to begg off, got another invite.
She texts back "gee thanks"
Im like WTF? So text back "Would you rather I be with you? You gave me no indication, and you had other plans."
What the heck?
Tonka's right. She probably did think you got a better offer so you were dumping those maybe plans with her. Not sayin' that was your intention at all, but that's probably how she saw it.

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

#77983 Dec 31, 2012
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
Why do you think she did it? Do you think her relationship was having trouble/wasn't a good fit after getting to know each other for a year?
Did her boyfriend find out and he broke up with her, or she took her behavior as a sign that her boyfriend isn't who she should be with, and she ended things?
She knew the relationship would end sooner or later because they just weren't going in the same direction. So I think what happened is a symptom of underlying issues - nothing terrible, but just knowing that they weren't right for each other.

Her boyfriend broke up with her. She denied doing anything with another guy and told him she slept on my couch, but either he or one of his friends saw us downtown because he described the other guy's shirt. Like I said, nothing overtly WRONG happened in front of me, but I guess he put two and two together.

Her boyfriend also told her she should consider making new friends because it's not cool that I let her "flirt" with another guy knowing she's in a relationship. That stung. But she told him to leave me out of it and that I'm not responsible for anything between them.

I truly had no idea anything bad was going to happen until the elevator doors closed in my face. That's where the naivety comes in and I need to get better about that.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#77984 Dec 31, 2012
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
Tonka's right. She probably did think you got a better offer so you were dumping those maybe plans with her. Not sayin' that was your intention at all, but that's probably how she saw it.
All about perception sometimes.

I recall one time I had no inention of going out one night. Girl called to see if I wanted to do something. Told her no thanks. Stayin home. Then a couple friends showed up at my door. Invite over the phone is a lot easier to decline than when someone's there in your face saying "get your ass dressed". Ended up shooting pool. Chick ended up at the same place and that's exactly how she took it: Better offer came along.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#77985 Dec 31, 2012
j_m_w wrote:
Her boyfriend also told her she should consider making new friends because it's not cool that I let her "flirt" with another guy knowing she's in a relationship. That stung. But she told him to leave me out of it and that I'm not responsible for anything between them.
Good for your friend. Maybe he spoke out of hurt, but he was completely wrong. Now, if your friend routinely was flirting with guys at the bar and going home with them (while also being in a LTR), then it's up to you as to whether you want to be friends with her, but this one instance? I wouldn't want any responsibility for that either.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#77986 Dec 31, 2012
PLUS: There is nothing wrong, really, with flirting.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#77987 Dec 31, 2012
j_m_w wrote:
<quoted text>She knew the relationship would end sooner or later because they just weren't going in the same direction. So I think what happened is a symptom of underlying issues - nothing terrible, but just knowing that they weren't right for each other.

Her boyfriend broke up with her. She denied doing anything with another guy and told him she slept on my couch, but either he or one of his friends saw us downtown because he described the other guy's shirt. Like I said, nothing overtly WRONG happened in front of me, but I guess he put two and two together.

Her boyfriend also told her she should consider making new friends because it's not cool that I let her "flirt" with another guy knowing she's in a relationship. That stung. But she told him to leave me out of it and that I'm not responsible for anything between them.

I truly had no idea anything bad was going to happen until the elevator doors closed in my face. That's where the naivety comes in and I need to get better about that.
It's not on you AT ALL. It's on your friend. Unless her safety is at issue, it's not your job to babysit. When it comes to that stuff, I couldn't care less what my buds do when we go out.

I know shes your friend, but good for him for dumping her. I would have done the same. Whether she actually slept with him or not is immaterial. You can't be with a woman who walks all over you.

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

#77988 Dec 31, 2012
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
<quoted text>
Good for your friend. Maybe he spoke out of hurt, but he was completely wrong. Now, if your friend routinely was flirting with guys at the bar and going home with them (while also being in a LTR), then it's up to you as to whether you want to be friends with her, but this one instance? I wouldn't want any responsibility for that either.
Thanks. And it's not like I was encouraging her - I was totally clueless.

I've been friends with L for about 3 months, we clicked really well when we first met so we grew pretty close pretty fast. But if this happens again, I'll have an honest conversation about it, and if it happens again after that I'll keep my distance. But I really doubt it - she feels awful. And we all do dumb stuff sometimes, especially under stress.

Since: Feb 08

Location hidden

#77989 Dec 31, 2012
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
<quoted text>
LOVE IT! I Think you should find a new mom and take a big garbage bag of dirty diapers off her hands, too.
Nope, keeping it completely legal. He can use new bags if the old ones are ripped (which he probably will just so it doesn't dump all over his truck bed)but can only "return" the garbage she dumped.
Otherwise it would be a great idea, but he doesn't want to end up with charges of his own.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#77990 Dec 31, 2012
I think Woman #1 was playing Race herself. She could have responded right away while they were texting each other with "sounds good, see you tonight." But she didn't. Half an hour passed.

I think she was checking in on another offer herself.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#77991 Dec 31, 2012
j_m_w wrote:
<quoted text> But if this happens again, I'll have an honest conversation about it, and if it happens again after that I'll keep my distance. But I really doubt it - she feels awful. And we all do dumb stuff sometimes, especially under stress.
I don't get that. I have friends who step out all the time. None of my business as far as I'm concerned. I'm not the relationship police.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#77992 Dec 31, 2012
RACE wrote:
Why are women so difficult?

I was planning on having a nice evening to myself, large fire to welcome in the new year...

Texted a female friend, "So, whats your plans for tonight?"

Texts back "was supposed to go to dinner, but feeling sick"

Text back "Thats terrible, hope you feel better. If you want you can come over and share your germs"

30 minutes later get a text from another female.
"coming up tonight, wanna play cards and have drinks?"

Wait for text back from first female....
Nothing, so I send her a text saying that I have to begg off, got another invite.

She texts back "gee thanks"

Im like WTF? So text back "Would you rather I be with you? You gave me no indication, and you had other plans."

What the heck?
Dude!! You had a potential 3 some in the works and you blew it!

:p
PEllen

Chicago, IL

#77993 Dec 31, 2012
My radio station from London is playing non stop Andre Rieu. I am in hog heaven even if I am still at work.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#77994 Dec 31, 2012
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
I think Woman #1 was playing Race herself. She could have responded right away while they were texting each other with "sounds good, see you tonight." But she didn't. Half an hour passed.
I think she was checking in on another offer herself.
Or she could have been taking a nap with her phone in the other room considering that she said she was not feeling well. And half the posters here like to say there is no obligation to jump every time the phone beeps at you. She could have heard the phone, been in the middle of something, like a big dump, and forgot to check it when she had time to.

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