Topix Chitown Regulars
PEllen

Chicago, IL

#77637 Dec 24, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/si deshow/student-plans-come-scho ol-santa-confused-violent-thre at-174737767.html
So what do you ( the group in general, not just you in particular) think of the suggestion that one of the Newtown mom's should post an Emmett Till type picture of crime scene photos so people (Wayne Lapeierre in particular is mentioned) can see what carnage actually looks like as a means to spark more outrage?

“Fort Kickass”

Since: Sep 09

Bloomington, IL

#77638 Dec 24, 2012
RACE wrote:
Wow, I am sorry some of you guy's are having a bummer holiday, kinda takes the sting out of being alone, so thanks in a way!(kidding)
Tonka, welcome back, thought maybe you found our logic too flawed for you to tolerate any longer :)
My neighbors had to put down their little doggie on Sat She was old and had an enlarged heart, could barely breathe. They were totally devastated (daughters words) over it.
I went thru my pictures because I remembered taking some of her that I liked, printed up 4 and put them into a collage frame, wrapped in brown paper and left it on their porch with a sympathy card.
Daughter told me later that her mom called her up when she found it crying her eyes out, but very happy for the pictures. So now I will have to hide under the bed for the day because no good deed goes unpunished.
Raaaace, that's like the sweetest thing ever.

I will say that all the drama with the in-laws makes me appreciate my own family and my upbringing more. Even with my mom's illness/death, we were able to have decent holidays those years. After all they shyte yesterday, we ordered a big azz takeout meal from Olive Garden and played table games and ate cookies all night. I hope that these are the memories my SIL takes away from the holidays eventually. We're going to do the same tonight.

“What's it to ya?”

Since: Mar 09

Location hidden

#77639 Dec 24, 2012
j_m_w wrote:
I know some people will skim by this War And Peace-length post and I understand, but I also know that some will read it and I appreciate that more than I can say.
Merry Christmas, for real.
:)
I know I haven't really said anything, but I've been following along. I think you're doing the right thing here. You need to do what's best for you...not like you haven't had your OWN emotional turmoil this year...and rather recently as well.

It's good that you said your piece (ahem...it is p-i-e-c-e in this context, just fyi :))and I think that you should reiterate to her that you are here for her if (when) she needs you, but tell her that you just can't listen to all the drama when she isn't going to make significant change is just more than you can do anymore. Then if she stays with the douche, remind her periodically that you're still there when she finally smartens up (needs you, runs from him in the night and needs shelter, calls crying because he *whatever*...)

I do think that making yourself peripheral to all of this is the best thing you can do for you. Maybe for her too. She may just realize that she has to actually do something concrete in order to get the support she needs because people aren't going to coddle her through this incredibly bad bad bad relationship. Maybe not. Hasn't worked for my sister, at all, but then maybe your friend is smarter.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

#77640 Dec 24, 2012
PEllen wrote:
<quoted text>
So what do you ( the group in general, not just you in particular) think of the suggestion that one of the Newtown mom's should post an Emmett Till type picture of crime scene photos so people (Wayne Lapeierre in particular is mentioned) can see what carnage actually looks like as a means to spark more outrage?
Knowing about what happened is bad enough, no need to post photos. And actually desiring to spark more outrage is detestable and counter-productive.

“Where is Tonka?”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#77641 Dec 24, 2012
Thanks, occasionally I get one right.
Matilda77 wrote:
<quoted text>
Raaaace, that's like the sweetest thing ever.
I will say that all the drama with the in-laws makes me appreciate my own family and my upbringing more. Even with my mom's illness/death, we were able to have decent holidays those years. After all they shyte yesterday, we ordered a big azz takeout meal from Olive Garden and played table games and ate cookies all night. I hope that these are the memories my SIL takes away from the holidays eventually. We're going to do the same tonight.

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

#77642 Dec 24, 2012
Matilda77 wrote:
<quoted text>
Raaaace, that's like the sweetest thing ever.
Ditto.
:)

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

#77643 Dec 24, 2012
Mimi Seattle wrote:
<quoted text>
I know I haven't really said anything, but I've been following along. I think you're doing the right thing here. You need to do what's best for you...not like you haven't had your OWN emotional turmoil this year...and rather recently as well.
It's good that you said your piece (ahem...it is p-i-e-c-e in this context, just fyi :))and I think that you should reiterate to her that you are here for her if (when) she needs you, but tell her that you just can't listen to all the drama when she isn't going to make significant change is just more than you can do anymore. Then if she stays with the douche, remind her periodically that you're still there when she finally smartens up (needs you, runs from him in the night and needs shelter, calls crying because he *whatever*...)
I do think that making yourself peripheral to all of this is the best thing you can do for you. Maybe for her too. She may just realize that she has to actually do something concrete in order to get the support she needs because people aren't going to coddle her through this incredibly bad bad bad relationship. Maybe not. Hasn't worked for my sister, at all, but then maybe your friend is smarter.
Thanks, and thanks for "piece." That is completely obvious to me now that I've had a few hours.:)

And thank you everyone for the validation. A couple of RL friends have said the same thing - that I need to do what's best for me, and now isn't a good time to take a stand or whatever.

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

#77644 Dec 24, 2012
I bought myself an iPhone 5 and went to a lovely Christmas Eve service at church. I feel a lot better. And Jasper is coming down to have lunch & hang out for awhile tomorrow (friend stuff... I can do this).
:)

“What's it to ya?”

Since: Mar 09

Location hidden

#77645 Dec 24, 2012
j_m_w wrote:
I bought myself an iPhone 5 and went to a lovely Christmas Eve service at church. I feel a lot better. And Jasper is coming down to have lunch & hang out for awhile tomorrow (friend stuff... I can do this).
:)
A friend brought some Christmas goodies by last night...AND showed off her new iphone 5. I think it was really just to show off the phone. <shrug> It's pretty sweet, but I have T-Mobile and apparently they are never going to embrace the iphone, so I'm good.

I did however spend some time at the apple store the other day, and I think I'm getting the mac book air...maybe.

I caught myself feeling like going to church tonight. I really enjoy the ritual and the...what?...fellowship I guess...on the holidays, but I talked myself out of it after a couple of minutes.
Sam I Am

Chicago, IL

#77646 Dec 24, 2012
RACE wrote:
Nice way to make it ALL the other guys (read me) fault.
I am fine with listening to any good ideas, but you have presented none, so what am I supposed to do? Come up with the ideas for you? All that I read WAS about limiting my rights, sure talking about it does not take my rights away, but all's your talking about is taking away my rights! Well, sorry but I dont want to discuss that.
Come up with an idea that does not step on my rights and I will be happy to discuss it.
<quoted text>
So once again it's back to whatever Race wants is all that matters. No room for discussion of a compromise, no room for consideration that another, different viewpoint might have some degree of merit. If Race is being asked to accept anything less than what Race wants, then it's a horrible, rights-violating idea. The embodiment of the American and Christmas spirits, you are.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#77647 Dec 25, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
Happy Festivus, bitches.
Carry on with your airing of greviances.
Tonka! Merry Christmas. You were missed.

“Where is Tonka?”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#77648 Dec 25, 2012
Merry Christmas all!
Hope everyone has a wonderful day! I have cigars, beer, wine, and Prime rib....Yeah, I gonna have a great day!

Took the mutt for a walk, and had set to percolator on really low, came back after 70 minutes, thought the coffee would be 1/2 gone, but no! and it was pitch black! This stuff is way, way good! I'm only 1/4 done and can feel the caffeine cranking me up!

Whoot!

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

#77649 Dec 25, 2012
Merry Christmas, all!

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#77650 Dec 25, 2012
RACE wrote:
Merry Christmas all!
Hope everyone has a wonderful day! I have cigars, beer, wine, and Prime rib....Yeah, I gonna have a great day!
Took the mutt for a walk, and had set to percolator on really low, came back after 70 minutes, thought the coffee would be 1/2 gone, but no! and it was pitch black! This stuff is way, way good! I'm only 1/4 done and can feel the caffeine cranking me up!
Whoot!
For just a moment I wondered why you were taking edog for a walk
Percolator? I got one of those for a wedding gift in 1970 and I don't think I have used it since the Bicentennial.

Get Mimi to get you some of that $40 /lb Starbucks they are only selling in Seattle and a French press then come back and talk coffee.

Menu for 13
appetizers- Maryland daughter doing baked brie
marinated mushrooms and artichokes and TJ frozen appetizers
butternut squash soup
honey baked ham
roasted duck with lingonberry sauce
wild rice/brown rice mix
roasted brussels sprouts
broccolini with lemon butter and almonds
homemade cranberry orange relish
mashed potatoes

Husband made pumpkin pies
SIL bringing chocolate chip cookie cake
I am assembling teh black forest cherry cake

Fresh fruit
Coffee

Lots of wine, hard and plain cider

Would have been 14 but SF daughters flights gone delayed and tehy couldn't have gotten her here until late Saturday and she has to leave Tuesday night to be at work on Wednesday.

Maybe Les Mis or Hobbit tonight instead of dishes.

Happy holidays all.

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#77651 Dec 25, 2012
Sigh. My computer is about to bite the dust. The upgrade for Firefox needs 41 MB and I only have 15 in available space

“Where is Tonka?”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#77652 Dec 25, 2012
Sounds Good PEllen,
My dinner guest is bringing corn, broccoli, and pumkin pie for dessert with whipped cream. I just had to go there and ask what the whipped cream was for...

Since: Jul 10

Location hidden

#77653 Dec 25, 2012
RACE wrote:
Sounds Good PEllen,
My dinner guest is bringing corn, broccoli, and pumkin pie for dessert with whipped cream. I just had to go there and ask what the whipped cream was for...
corn, broccoli and pumpkin in a pie? Sounds kind of gross...
;-)

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#77654 Dec 25, 2012
PEllen wrote:
<quoted text>Show up. Be there. Make sure he understands she has friends that won't let her be isolated.Smile at him a lot. Make him nervous. Ask detailed questions about his friends and family in Peru and how different teh culture is between the 2 countries. Ask for his mother's address because you heard there were some gorgeous Peruvian woven wool somethings or teh recipe for making Peruvian roast chicken or something and you would love her input. Smile at him when you press that you don't want to bother him, its a (you know)ladies-not girl, ladies- thing.
ITA.

Kill him with kindness. That way, he has no room to complaint about you to A.

“Where is Tonka?”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#77655 Dec 25, 2012
Ha! When you put it that way....But isnt that how it all ends up anyway?
Sgt__Smith wrote:
<quoted text>
corn, broccoli and pumpkin in a pie? Sounds kind of gross...
;-)

“What's it to ya?”

Since: Mar 09

Location hidden

#77656 Dec 25, 2012
Merry Christmas everyone!

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