This Is All About Jobs: Congressman Boehner Applauds Vote to Fully Repeal Health Care LawWASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)Today Speaker of the House John Boehner issued the following letter to the American people:
Dear American People,
Yesterday, your hardworking House Republicans tried, once again, and failed, once again, to repeal Obamacare. And I really thought we had a good chance this time.
Thats because we were all united in our hatred for this infernal and takes-too-long-to-read law. Every last one of us cast his vote to strike it down, from crazy little Paul Ryan to that arrogant bastard Eric Cantor.
And I wish you could have seen the faces of those freshman Republicans as they voted to repeal Obamacareso innocent, so full of hope and wonder. As I told them yesterday,Youll never forget your first time.
Its important for you to know that even as scandals swirl about the cesspool known as the White House, some folks in Washington are still working hard for the American people.
It was a gruelling week for me, what with popping up in front of the TV cameras every five minutes saying,Whos going to jail?, plus trying to rid our land of Obamacare. But I dont want your thanks. Save that for the dedicated House Republicans who have now voted thirty-seven times to repeal. You cant put a price tag on that kind of performance. Well, actually, you can: its cost the taxpayers over fifty million dollars.
And worth every million, damn it.
One last thing. I know some of you are probably thinking that after suffering this latest defeat, we House Republicans are just going to take our bat and ball and go home. Well, theres an old saying where I come from: the thirty-eighth times the charm.
Congressman John Boehner (R-West Chester) released the following statement after the House passed H.R. 45, legislation fully repealing and defunding the presidents health care law:
This is all about jobs. The presidents health care law is already undermining our economy -- employers are cutting workers and cutting hours, costs are going up, and even Democrats are worried the whole thing is headed for a train wreck. There are also serious concerns about whether the IRS should be involved in our health care at all, let alone as the laws chief enforcer. Fully repealing ObamaCare will help us build a stronger, healthier economy, and will clear the way for patient-centered reforms that lower health care costs and protect jobs. This is a good, common-sense bill, and I thank Congresswoman Bachmann for her leadership in bringing it to a vote today.