"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline." 2 Timothy 1:7<quoted text> First & foremost, didn't the Bible say,"I did not create the spirit of fear?" Why would the controller of all things good & pure want his followers to be scared of him? That sounds like the words of a king, not the God of free will! That's not the experience I've had personally with God. As a youth I was horrible. I fought everyday. I beat bullies, fought my mom, & beat the innocent into submission. Every night I went to bed, I dreamt of the devil. My mother told me,"you keep it up, the devil gonna get you!" But I was hard headed, wanting to blaze my own path. Till 1 night these dreams became more than a dream. I was actually feeling things touching me in my sleep, talking to me. Saying things like,"you belong to me now." It was then I decided to change. I got an overwhelming feeling I had better make a change for the better, & I did. My life changed because of that overwhelming feeling. A force of purity & piety guided me in the right direction, not a sense of fear. Fear is not free will. Its a form of enslavement!
"Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love." 1 John 4:18
Children with loving parents are still punished if they misbehave. The fear of making them angry and displeasing them is often what keeps them from acting out bad behavior.
It's not an unhealthy fear. It's fear of displeasing someone you love. Same with fearing the Lord.