Barack Obama, our next President

[THE DEBIL]

LOOK, SISTER, HERE'S HOW IT IS: RIGHT NOW DEBIL TOLERATIN' YOU. BUT IF YOU WANT TO GET DOWN AN' ROLL THEN LES DO IT. DEBIL WRESTLE IN THE REAL WORLD AN' HE WRESTLE IN THIS ONE - STANDS TO REASON. SO MAKE YOU MIND UP, YOU GON' PLAY STOOPID GIRL-GAMES WITH DEBIL? CAUSE THAT NOT GON' WORK OUT REAL WELL FO' YOU. OR WOULD YOU RATHER ARM WRESTLE HIM? THAT NOT WORK OUT SO WELL EITHER. ONCE AGAIN, YOU MAKE THE FUNDAMENTAL MISTAKE OF ASSUMIN' THAT THERE ARE ABSOLUTES; AT LEAST IN THIS INSTANCE, HONEY, YOU FREE WILL GONNA COST YOU SOME SKIN.

DEBIL ENCOUNTER LOTS OF (PSYCHOTIC) WOMEN ONLINE AN' HE MAKE THE SAME OFFER TO ALL OF THEM: DEBIL A MAGNIFICENT MAN WITH A LOVING HEART AN' A VIVID IMAGINATION WHO CAN TAKE YOU TO HEIGHTS OF ECSTASY YOU NEVER KNEW EXISTED. BUT HE ALSO A PRICK. WHICH DEBIL YOU WANT, SISTER? CAUSE DEBIL TIRE OF THIS STOOPID GAME. DEBIL TAKE HIS ANSWER OFF THE AIR WHILE HE EAT CAROL'S NASTY OL' ASS...

[THE DEBIL]

Sister Kathryn Lust wrote:

<quoted text>Mostly because I don't 'believe' in the devil, any more than I 'believe' in his opponent.
My beliefs are inclusive, not divisive.
Next?

THEN WHY YOU SAY DEBIL "OF THE DEBIL?" CAUSE YOU NOT BELIEVE IN YOUSELF? WHAT HAPPEN TO THOSE "TRUE" WORDS?

[THE DEBIL]

OH, WAIT... THAT WUZ ANOTHER DUMB BITCH. DEBIL HAVE TROUBLE KEEPIN' YOU ALL STRAIGHT.

[THE DEBIL]

DEBIL A MAN, YOU A WOMAN - AT LEAST TACITLY. THAT NOT GOOD ENOUGH FO' YOU YOU GOT TO LOOK UP SOME OF THESE REPUBLICAN MAN/WOMAN COMBINATIONS ON HERE... OHHHH! IS THAT WHAT YOU MEANT WHEN YOU CALL YOUSELF AN "INDEPENDENT?"

[THE DEBIL]

Sister Kathryn Lust wrote:

<quoted text>Fortunately for me, that particular decision is not yours to make, son.

YOU ARE SO... SO... SO... VERY WRONG IN THIS ASSUMPTION, MOM. DEBIL CAN FCUK YOU SILLY ANY TIME HE WANT. IT CAN BE INCLUSIVE OR DIVISIVE AN' FROM NOW ON, DEBIL NOT GON' GIVE YOU A CHOICE IN THE MATTER. THE UNIVERSE JUS' VISIT YOU WITH A NEW AXIOM AN' YOU CHOICE OF DRESS, OR EVEN YOU SEX, NOT MAKE ONE IOTA OF DIFFERENCE. NOW DEBIL GON' GIVE YOU THE SAME CHANCE HE GIVE EVERYBODY: RUN. DO IT NOW.

[Sister Kathryn Lust]

THE DEBIL wrote:

LOOK, SISTER, HERE'S HOW IT IS: RIGHT NOW DEBIL TOLERATIN' YOU. BUT IF YOU WANT TO GET DOWN AN' ROLL THEN LES DO IT. DEBIL WRESTLE IN THE REAL WORLD AN' HE WRESTLE IN THIS ONE - STANDS TO REASON. SO MAKE YOU MIND UP, YOU GON' PLAY STOOPID GIRL-GAMES WITH DEBIL? CAUSE THAT NOT GON' WORK OUT REAL WELL FO' YOU. OR WOULD YOU RATHER ARM WRESTLE HIM? THAT NOT WORK OUT SO WELL EITHER. ONCE AGAIN, YOU MAKE THE FUNDAMENTAL MISTAKE OF ASSUMIN' THAT THERE ARE ABSOLUTES; AT LEAST IN THIS INSTANCE, HONEY, YOU FREE WILL GONNA COST YOU SOME SKIN.
DEBIL ENCOUNTER LOTS OF (PSYCHOTIC) WOMEN ONLINE AN' HE MAKE THE SAME OFFER TO ALL OF THEM: DEBIL A MAGNIFICENT MAN WITH A LOVING HEART AN' A VIVID IMAGINATION WHO CAN TAKE YOU TO HEIGHTS OF ECSTASY YOU NEVER KNEW EXISTED. BUT HE ALSO A PRICK. WHICH DEBIL YOU WANT, SISTER? CAUSE DEBIL TIRE OF THIS STOOPID GAME. DEBIL TAKE HIS ANSWER OFF THE AIR WHILE HE EAT CAROL'S NASTY OL' ASS...

Deb, dear, I stopped watching wrestling when WWE became WWF.

Next.

[Sister Kathryn Lust]

THE DEBIL wrote:

<quoted text>
THEN WHY YOU SAY DEBIL "OF THE DEBIL?"

Jes tryin' t'keep ya on ya toesies.

Working so far?

[THE DEBIL]

NOW YOU LAY DOWN AN' LIFT YOU CASSOCK. YOU GOT NO SAY IN THE MATTER ANYMO'.

[THE DEBIL]

THE PRIEST SAT IN THE DIM BLUE LIGHT AND TYPED LIKE A WOMAN AS BEST HE COULD. HE WAS IN THE CONTEST OF HIS LIFE AND HE WAS SCARED, GENUINELY SCARED. HE'D NEVER ENCOUNTERED ANYTHING LIKE THIS AND HE CLUTCHED HIS TATTERED BATHROBE AROUND HIM LIKE A FEATHERY CUIRASS BOTH TO WARM HIM FROM THE CHILL WIND THAT BLEW THROUGH THE RECTORY AT WILL AND FROM THE OBVIOUS EVIL IN FRONT OF HIS WATERY BLUE EYES.

[Nathan Bedford Forrest]

http://www.youtube.com/watch...

Obama's first cabinet meeting after the election....

[THE DEBIL]

"HOW WOULD A WOMAN SAY THAT?" HE THOUGHT AND TYPED A FEW WORDS WHICH SOUNDED WEAK AND INEFFECTUAL EVEN TO HIM, AND EVEN AS THE WORDS APPEARED ON THE SCREEN HE KNEW THE... DEMON WOULD BE ABLE TO SEE THIS WAS NO WOMAN. HE WRUNG HIS HANDS - WHICH HURT BADLY - AND HIS LINED FACE REFLECTED HIS TORMENT... "WHAT WOULD JESUS DO? WHAT WOULD HE DO? DID JESUS KNOW THERE WOULD BE AN INTERNET?" DID HE REALIZE THE PERSONAL HELL IT HAD CAUSED THE PRIEST? WHAT SHOULD HE SAY? WHAT SHOULD HE DO? HE OPTED FOR FLIPPANCY BUT HE KNEW AS HE DID SO THAT THE DEMON WOULD SEE IT AS SUPERFICIAL, DEFENSIVE... OH GOD, HE WISHED HE KNEW HOW A REAL WOMAN SOUNDED... A SUPERIOR WOMAN WITH FINE, HIGH BREASTS, GOOD MORAL INSTINCTS AND MORE WITH THAN HE'D EVER POSSESSED. HE WAS AWARE THAT THE WOMAN HE WAS TRYING TO BE EXCITED HIM ON SOME LEVEL. HE WANTED HER HERE WITH HIM NOW TO HOLD HIM, TO COMFORT HIM, TO WHISPER THE RIGHT WORDS IN HIS EAR SO HE WOULDN'T FEEL SO HELPLESS... BUT HE WAS ALONE. THIS WAS HIS CROSS TO BEAR AND SOMEHOW HE MUST BEAR IT.

[THE DEBIL]

Sister Kathryn Lust wrote:

<quoted text>Jes tryin' t'keep ya on ya toesies.
Working so far?

UM... NOPE.

[Sister Kathryn Lust]

THE DEBIL wrote:

NOW YOU LAY DOWN AN' LIFT YOU CASSOCK. YOU GOT NO SAY IN THE MATTER ANYMO'.

Nuns don't wear the cassock, bitch.

Molesters do.

Thanks for the heads-up......as if I needed one.

[THE DEBIL]

THE DEBIL WATCHED THE MAN TYPE CAREFULLY AND COULD SENSE HIS FEAR. BUT AFTER SO MANY LONG, LONG YEARS HE DIDN'T GLOAT, DIDN'T ALLOW HIMSELF TO ENJOY THE OTHER MAN'S DISCOMFORT. IT WAS ABOUT NUMBERS, ABOUT SOULS AND HE SENSED THIS ONE WAS FALLING SEAMLESSLY INTO HIS HANDS.

TO WATCH HIM ONE WOULDN'T KNOW IT WAS EVEN A CONTEST OF WILLS. HE WOULD WAIT... AND WATCH... AND THEN RESPOND.. AND WAIT... AND WATCH... AND YET EVEN THE CASUAL ONLOOKER WOULD RECOGNIZE THE PREDATORY, DISPASSIONATE GAZE OF THE KILLER OBSERVING HIS PREY... EVEN THE CASUAL OBSERVER COULD SEE THAT A KILL WAS NEAR.

[THE DEBIL]

Sister Kathryn Lust wrote:

<quoted text>Nuns don't wear the cassock, bitch.
Molesters do.
Thanks for the heads-up......as if I needed one.

AWWWW... NOW WE'RE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE? WHO CARES WHAT NUNS WEAR? WHEN IT'S TORN OFF AND SHREDDED ON THE FLOOR OF THE CELL IT'S JUST SO MUCH CARPET.

[THE DEBIL]

SO, UM, "MOLESTERS" WEAR CASSOCKS? YOU MEAN PRIESTS? AND HOW DO WE KNOW THIS, SISTER? WHICH CHURCH IS IT YOU ATTEND? DO THEY LET YOU WATCH?

[THE DEBIL]

GOOD TO SEE YOUR LUST HASN'T BLINDED YOU TO YOUR OUTRAGE... I'M CURIOUS, SISTER. WHAT SORT OF WOMAN USES THE WORD "BITCH" TO DESCRIBE A MALE ENTITY?

[THE DEBIL]

OH, UM, "SISTER?" HEAD'S UP.

[THE DEBIL]

OH DEAR! THE UNPLEASANT SMELL OF CHAT ROOM ASS-RAPE! COULD ONE OF YOU PEOPLE HAND ME SOME FABREEZE? DO IT!!! DO IT NOW!!!!

[Sister Kathryn Lust]

THE DEBIL wrote:

<quoted text>
AWWWW... NOW WE'RE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE? WHO CARES WHAT NUNS WEAR? WHEN IT'S TORN OFF AND SHREDDED ON THE FLOOR OF THE CELL IT'S JUST SO MUCH CARPET.

One post from me indicating some tepid approval means we're "friends" to you?

Suck it.

Yes, Mr. Flex, I mean 'yourself'.

Next?