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“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

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#1
Mar 9, 2013
 
DEAR ABBY: I have a problem. Basically, I don't like me. I am self-conscious about my weight, my face, my personality. I'm not pretty. I have heard so many times I should "just be myself" that I am sick of it! I don't want to be myself because I don't like myself.

All of my friends are either beautiful, witty, kind or whatever. And I am not, I guess. Please tell me what to do about it.-- COMING UP SHORT IN OREGON

DEAR COMING UP SHORT: I do have a few suggestions, and the first is to stop being your own worst enemy. The more you dwell on what you think you lack, the more you will amplify those things. Find one thing you like about yourself and build from there.

Because you're self-conscious about your weight, do something about it by adopting a healthy eating and exercise plan. While you may not be a cover girl, you can be well-groomed. More important than being "witty" is to be a good listener. Remember that, and people will think you are a great conversationalist.

The more you brood about yourself, the lonelier you will become. The more you think about helping others, the less time you will have to think about yourself.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I are in our mid-40s and have four beautiful daughters. A boy who dated one of them has become a family friend over the past few years.

"Brett" is a nice young man and has always been helpful with our family. The problem is, Brett texts and calls my wife on a daily basis. The conversation is benign, but I can tell he has a crush on her.

I have asked my wife to stop communicating with him so often, but she insists it's "just a friendship" and nothing is going on. My point is that there is something going on -- from his side -- even though she may not realize it.

We have gone round and round about this to the point of exhaustion. Should I let this go or continue to insist that their relationship be redefined?-- UNEASY IN FLORIDA

DEAR UNEASY: Looking from the outside in, I suspect that your wife is enjoying all the attention she's receiving from this young man. She's in her mid-40s and it has to be flattering. This is not to imply that the communications will lead to anything more. So step back, find your sense of humor and try to be less heavy-handed until this blows over. Because it will.

DEAR ABBY: My stepfather died recently. I found out when I saw his obituary in the newspaper. It described him as a "loving husband and father," and while I know that's a fairly generic epitaph, nothing about it is true. He was an alcoholic who had several affairs while married to my mother. He also abused me and my stepsiblings physically and sexually.

It's bad enough that he died without having to face the consequences of his actions, but it kills me to know that "loving husband and father" is how our community and history will remember him now that he's gone. Is there anything I can do to get some form of the truth out there?-- ANGRY IN TENNESSEE

DEAR ANGRY: Yes, there is. Just keep talking and the word will get around.

DEAR READERS: To those of you living where daylight saving time is observed, I'm offering this gentle reminder: Turn your clocks forward one hour at bedtime tonight. Daylight saving time begins at 2 a.m. tomorrow, and you know what that means -- spring is on the way!

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

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#2
Mar 9, 2013
 

Judged:

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1- Drown your sorrows in drugs, promiscuity, and alcohol.

2- I disagree with Abby. While this may not lead to anything, a married 40-something constantly flirting with a young boy is inappropriate at best. Dude needs to lay his foot down, tell his wife to knock it off, and have a little word with this boy.

3- I suppose you'd rather have the paper describe him as a sexually abusive alcoholic, huh? The man is dead, he's got his just deserts. Move on, it's ill forum to smear a dead man's name.

4- I hate this transition. Just when I like the sun coming up as I'm leaving for work, it's gonna be dark in the mornings again.

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

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#3
Mar 9, 2013
 

Judged:

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L1: If you don't like yourself, change yourself.

L2: I agree with edog. This might be harmless now, but it's a slippery slope. She needs to put a stop to it now before it becomes a real problem.

L3: Again, agree with edog. Is Abby really suggesting going around telling people all this private stuff about a dead man who's not around to defend himself? Even assuming that what the LW says is true, it's still going to make the LW look bad to yap about it now.

L4: Three for three, dog. Getting up with the sunshine is such a tease!

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

United States

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#4
Mar 9, 2013
 

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j_m_w wrote:
L2: I agree with edog. This might be harmless now, but it's a slippery slope. She needs to put a stop to it now before it becomes a real problem.
And I doubt her answer would be the same if the genders were reversed. If a woman wrote in about her husband getting texts and calls everyday from their daughter's female friend, think Abby would tell her to laugh it off?

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

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#5
Mar 9, 2013
 

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IF LW and his wife are in their mid 40's, odds are their daughters bf's are under 18. If it was the dad texting a girl that age, he'd be at risk for charges. Same to the mom. Cougars are cute on TV, not real life.

Mimi- what was the name of the teacher in Seattle who got pregnant by her 13 year old student a few years back--and married him after she got out of jail.Was that MaryKay LeTourneau?

So when someone tells LW3 that they are sorry for her loss, she can say He was a drunk and a pedo and he is better off dead, thank you. And how is your day going?

(Hey Dog- your mood is up- must be the Sat OT, huh?)

“What's it to ya?”

Since: Mar 09

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#6
Mar 9, 2013
 
1: See a shrink.

2: Mommy's gettin' her some young stuff on the side.

3: Really, why do we still need to do this time change twice a year every freaking year. Can't we just pick a time and stay with it? The rest of the world doesn't do this. We are not a nation of farmers anymore. It is not necessary.

/rant

“What's it to ya?”

Since: Mar 09

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#7
Mar 9, 2013
 
PEllen wrote:
IF LW and his wife are in their mid 40's, odds are their daughters bf's are under 18. If it was the dad texting a girl that age, he'd be at risk for charges. Same to the mom. Cougars are cute on TV, not real life.
Mimi- what was the name of the teacher in Seattle who got pregnant by her 13 year old student a few years back--and married him after she got out of jail.Was that MaryKay LeTourneau?
Yeah that was her. You know they are married right?

“What's it to ya?”

Since: Mar 09

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#8
Mar 9, 2013
 
Ack! 3 was supposed to be 4.

For 3 I'm on team PEllen.

“What's it to ya?”

Since: Mar 09

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#9
Mar 9, 2013
 
OMG I need better reading comprehension today.

http://www.komonews.com/news/local/45731497.h...

Since: Jan 10

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#10
Mar 9, 2013
 

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L1: You sound incredibly self-absorbed and you probabyl are very tiring, boring, and annoying to be around, constantly needing affirmation and compliments. I have no advice for you other than to freaking knock it off.

L2: I think some couples should be willing to consider giving each other a "one veto" power thing. You get to veto one superficial "relationship." (Dude, if you had real reason to worry, there'd be more than one text a day.)

L3: You're giving WAY too much power to the words in that obit. They are cookie cutter. And people who knew him knew he was a dkhead alcoholic and they probably couldn't stand him either.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

United States

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#11
Mar 9, 2013
 
PEllen wrote:
(Hey Dog- your mood is up- must be the Sat OT, huh?)
I saw the sun for the first time in weeks yesterday. Hooked up a date for tonight. With some overtime and a decent tax return coming, my financial woes have been lifted for a while. Warm weather is right around the corner.... I'm feeling pretty good today.
:)

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me!

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#12
Mar 9, 2013
 

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1 I find it amazing that you even have friends, but since you do, you must have some redeeming qualities, start there.

2 Deal lamy I text my sons female friend daily, nothing sexual, just friendly banter. My wife thinks that I need to knock it off, but I keep telling her that this will blow over. Lamy, how do I convince my wife that the crush this nubile little chicken has on me is nothing for her to be concerned about?

3 He's dead, history is not going to remember him or you, so find another way to deal with your pain.

Since: Jan 10

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#13
Mar 9, 2013
 

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edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>
I saw the sun for the first time in weeks yesterday. Hooked up a date for tonight. With some overtime and a decent tax return coming, my financial woes have been lifted for a while. Warm weather is right around the corner.... I'm feeling pretty good today.
:)
I'll even wish yhou a hangover-free Sunday.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#14
Mar 9, 2013
 
L1: Volunteer. Change your diet. Cut your hair. Get a facial. Do something. Don't just sit there and complain.

L2: Eh, she's suppose to be the adult and I'm not so sure the wife is all that innocent. Teach the kid that it's inappropriate. The hubby needs to be firmer with wifey. Young boys for many reasons go after older females -- be it experience, them feeling older, not worried about making babies, etc. MILF didn't come about b/c it's so innocent.

L3: Abby, you left your smart pill untouched today. Why would you tell anyone that it's okay to bad mouth a dead person? She needs therapy not a bullhorn.

Daylight savings time -- I love it b/c when I get home from work I feel like a have some of the day left still. In the morning, I'm going to work so who cares if it's light or dark.

“Not a real reg”

Since: Jan 13

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#15
Mar 9, 2013
 
Mimi Seattle wrote:
1: See a shrink.
2: Mommy's gettin' her some young stuff on the side.
3: Really, why do we still need to do this time change twice a year every freaking year. Can't we just pick a time and stay with it? The rest of the world doesn't do this. We are not a nation of farmers anymore. It is not necessary.
/rant
3: Absolutely right. When I moved to AZ I liked not having to change clocks. However, the whole country has to go along. At work it was a pain to keep in mind the time changes I had to deal with with the plants in different states. And if you watched a cable program at 7 then it would be on at 8 or 6, can't remember which way. Then back on 7 at the next change.

Since: Jan 10

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#16
Mar 9, 2013
 
Mimi, ITA. And it's not really a farmer thing; it's more about energy conservation. Wiki has a really good entry on it.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

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#17
Mar 9, 2013
 
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
Mimi, ITA. And it's not really a farmer thing; it's more about energy conservation. Wiki has a really good entry on it.
And it actually causes a slight increase in energy consumption in certain areas. The overall savings it DOES create, are so miniscule (0.03%) that it's hardly worth it. I would support doing away with the whole thing.

http://www.csmonitor.com/Environment/Energy-V...

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

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#18
Mar 9, 2013
 
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
<quoted text>
I'll even wish yhou a hangover-free Sunday.
Thanks! Though not likely!

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#19
Mar 9, 2013
 
edogxxx wrote:
2- I disagree with Abby. While this may not lead to anything, a married 40-something constantly flirting with a young boy is inappropriate at best.
She's going to convince him to kill her husband and make it seem like his idea.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#20
Mar 9, 2013
 
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
(Dude, if you had real reason to worry, there'd be more than one text a day.)
How do you know there isn't?

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