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21 - 40 of 49 Comments Last updated Nov 5, 2012

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#21
Nov 2, 2012
 

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edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>
Not true. It's illegal for two fifteen year olds to have sex. It doesn't just become illegal if one turns 16. And teenagers aren't ending up on sex offender registries for having sex. Bet you can't name one case of this happening.
Actually, you're right. It just isn't enforced.

Since: Feb 08

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#22
Nov 2, 2012
 

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Mister Tonka wrote:
This dude sounds like another Sandusky. Dirtbag for life.
I can never equate any rapist of adults with rapists of children.
It may be only a slight difference, but it's a huge one to me. Even in you're in a position of power over adults and take advantage, it still is not as heinous as raping a child.
The guy in the letter raped/coerced ADULT inmates, not children.

Since: Jan 10

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#23
Nov 2, 2012
 
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>
Not true. It's illegal for two fifteen year olds to have sex.
that's not true. WHy do you keep saying things that are so wrong, when people here have posted links to prove what the law is? Many states have graduated ages of consent. Like, a 14yo can have sex with a 15yo. Then a 15yo can have sex with a 14yo, 15yo, 16yo, or 17yo.

Just because it's illegal for a 15yo to have sex with a 20yo doesn't mean it's illegal to have sex with another 15yo.

Since: Jan 10

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#24
Nov 2, 2012
 

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of_consent_...

After this,I don't want to see any more "It's illegal for minors to have sex" or "It's illegal for a 15yo to have sex" crap.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#25
Nov 2, 2012
 

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RedheadwGlasses wrote:
<quoted text>
that's not true. WHy do you keep saying things that are so wrong, when people here have posted links to prove what the law is? Many states have graduated ages of consent. Like, a 14yo can have sex with a 15yo. Then a 15yo can have sex with a 14yo, 15yo, 16yo, or 17yo.
Just because it's illegal for a 15yo to have sex with a 20yo doesn't mean it's illegal to have sex with another 15yo.
Pssst. It is true, Angela. I was surprised. They just don't enforce it.:(

Since: Jan 10

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#26
Nov 2, 2012
 
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
Pssst. It is true, Angela. I was surprised. They just don't enforce it.:(
NO, IT IS NOT. IT varies by state. Many states have graduated ages of consent, as I posted above and linked to.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#28
Nov 2, 2012
 
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>
Not true. It's illegal for two fifteen year olds to have sex. It doesn't just become illegal if one turns 16. And teenagers aren't ending up on sex offender registries for having sex. Bet you can't name one case of this happening.
I just dropped a link for you, but Topix gave me the naughty word warning so I don't know if it posted.

Here's a short link to the same story.

http://alturl.com/nkqxt

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Chicago, IL

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#29
Nov 2, 2012
 
Whatever the age of consent is, if you're below it, it's illegal to have sex at all. I can't understand why you don't get this.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#30
Nov 2, 2012
 
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
<quoted text>
NO, IT IS NOT. IT varies by state. Many states have graduated ages of consent, as I posted above and linked to.
That was the ages of consent. Meaning at 16 (in some places) or whatever you can give consent and are of legal age to say "yay" or "nay" to sex. Technically, it is against the law for a 15 year old to have sex. They just don't charge a 15 year olds for having sex with other 15 year olds.

I'll find the link. I understand totally what you are saying about age of consent.

Believe me, I was shocked when I read it. Maybe when I find it again we'll see it's a bad site or whatever. Right now I'm going on a mini-break. Warning: I will be back.

Since: Jan 10

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#31
Nov 2, 2012
 
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
That was the ages of consent. Meaning at 16 (in some places) or whatever you can give consent and are of legal age to say "yay" or "nay" to sex. Technically, it is against the law for a 15 year old to have sex. They just don't charge a 15 year olds for having sex with other 15 year olds.
I'll find the link. I understand totally what you are saying about age of consent.
Believe me, I was shocked when I read it. Maybe when I find it again we'll see it's a bad site or whatever. Right now I'm going on a mini-break. Warning: I will be back.
Sigh. No. Yes, in some states they just don't prosecute the 15yos. but in other states, it is PERFECTLY LEGAL for 15 year olds to have sex with one another.

Since: Jan 10

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#32
Nov 2, 2012
 

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edogxxx wrote:
Whatever the age of consent is, if you're below it, it's illegal to have sex at all. I can't understand why you don't get this.
Because YOU. ARE. WRONG. "AGe of consent" means people of that age can have sex wtih anyone their age or older. In most states, that's 16. A 16yo can have sex with an 80yo (so long as that person isn't in a position of authority) and it's legal. But in some states, it is specifically allowed *by state statute* for younger teens, 14 or 15, to have sex with other kids their same age or within a set number of years in age difference.

I can understand why you don't get this, because you have no brain activity.
PEllen

Chicago, IL

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#33
Nov 2, 2012
 

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Sam I Am wrote:
1. It might be more productive to start with looking at how you failed as parents to raise a child so devoid of self-esteem and perspective.
.
How would that be productive? The damage is done unless they have younger children at home.Would it help any for LW to berat herself for what has happened to her daughter. Too attenuated for my taste.

The grown daughter is not litening to them now. If they suddenly went through a course of psychotherapy and asked her how she felt about all that, the woman would be assured her parents went off the deep end

Since: Jan 10

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#34
Nov 2, 2012
 

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ARksansas: It is *legal* for teens age 14 to have sex with teens age 14 to 17. And by "legal," I mean, the state statute spells out that this is legal and cannot be prosecuted as a crime.

California: Two minors age 14-17 can have sex if they are the same age.

Colorado: Age of consent is 17, but 15yos and 16yos may have sex with someone their own age or up to 10 years older than them.

Connecticut: A 13-year-old can consent to any 15-year-old.
A 15-year-old can consent to any 17-year-old.
A 15-year-old born on 1 January can consent to a 18-year-old born on 1 February. This is just under a 3-year age difference.

Delaware: The age of consent in Delaware is 18, but it is legal for teenagers aged 16 and 17 to engage in sexual intercourse as long as the older partner is younger than 30.

ET CETERA. Sheesh. Read and comprehend people.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#35
Nov 2, 2012
 
Toj wrote:
Technically, it is against the law for a 15 year old to have sex.
This whole conversation began as a question about "sex offenders".

Is it illegal to have sex with a 15 year old? Sure. But are all convicted of this crime sentenced to be registered sex offenders? No. Look at Angela's link. Georgia, for instance, makes it a misdemeanor if you are within 4 years of the minor's age. Anything higher, THEN you are a sex offender.

So back the the original question, is a "sex offender" a pariah for life? It all depends on what his crime is. Someone in Georgia would not get labelled a sex offendeer, but another locale may not have that 4 year window and would label the 18 year old banging his 16 year old girlfriend as a sex offender.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#36
Nov 2, 2012
 

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"In the United States? It depends on how old each one is, and what state they are in. Each U.S. state has its own age of consent laws.

Also note that this question only asks whether it is legal for two underage people to have sex, NOT whether prosecution is likely. Courts will often "look the other way" and decline to prosecute when the two lovers are both underage and are the same age, or only a couple of years apart. This answer does not address the likelihood of prosecution, only the legality of the sexual contact.

If they are both the same age (for example, two 15-year-olds), then yes, it would be legal in most states. There are only a few states -- such as California, South Dakota, Oregon and Wisconsin -- where ANY two minors who are of the same age can be prosecuted for having sex with each other, either because 1) the law specifically says so, or 2) the law makes it a crime for "anyone" or "any person" to have sex with an underage person, with no specification on how old the "perpetrator" must be.

Other states, however, have similar laws that are not so all-encompassing. For example, Indiana has a similar law, but it only applies to persons 13 or younger.

New York has a law that makes sex with a "victim" under 17 a misdemeanor if the "perpetrator" is at least 16. So, by this law, two 16-year-olds could be prosecuted for having sex with each other.

And in South Carolina, a person older than 14 who commits (or attempts to commit) a "lewd act" with a person under 16 can be charged with "committing a lewd act upon a child under 16." So, for example, a 15-year-old girl could be prosecuted for giving her 15-year-old boyfriend a hand job.

If both are underage, but they are not the same age, then it becomes more complicated. In some states, the "perpetrator" must be a certain number of years older than the "victim," in order for sexual contact to be a crime.

Many states also have "close in age exemptions" that allow two underage people to have sex, or allow an overage person to have sex with an underage person, as long as the difference in their ages is only a few years.

Additionally, many states that don't have close in age exemptions DO have lesser charges (a misdemeanor instead of a felony) when the age difference is only a few years.

For a more useful and definitive answer, you will have to ask another question, this time specifying 1) the exact age of the two people involved, and 2) what state or country they are in. "

For now, Wiki: http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Is_it_legal_for_two...

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#37
Nov 2, 2012
 
Here's another link: http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f6-sex-puberty...

There is a difference of legality of having sex and statutory rape.

Before the age of consent, generally, it is illegal to have sex. If both are under the age of consent, it is not statutory rape but it is illegal, only no one is going to prosecute that.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#38
Nov 2, 2012
 

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Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>This whole conversation began as a question about "sex offenders".
Is it illegal to have sex with a 15 year old? Sure. But are all convicted of this crime sentenced to be registered sex offenders? No. Look at Angela's link. Georgia, for instance, makes it a misdemeanor if you are within 4 years of the minor's age. Anything higher, THEN you are a sex offender.
So back the the original question, is a "sex offender" a pariah for life? It all depends on what his crime is. Someone in Georgia would not get labelled a sex offendeer, but another locale may not have that 4 year window and would label the 18 year old banging his 16 year old girlfriend as a sex offender.
No I get it. I agree with you it can be misleading. The thing Edog said that I agreed with had to do with the legality of having sex period. I was told I was wrong -- I wasn't. I was surprised at the answer myself as a matter of fact (and surprised Edog was right on that point).
Kuuipo

Monterey, CA

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#39
Nov 2, 2012
 
LW1: If the facts that her husband was fired and charged with second-degree sexual assault weren't enough to persuade your daughter to end her marriage, I think your chances of getting through to her are slim. Your best bet would be to see if she will go to counseling. An objective professional might be able to help her see the light.
Sam I Am

Huntingdon, TN

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#40
Nov 2, 2012
 
PEllen wrote:
<quoted text>
How would that be productive? The damage is done unless they have younger children at home.Would it help any for LW to berat herself for what has happened to her daughter. Too attenuated for my taste.
The grown daughter is not litening to them now. If they suddenly went through a course of psychotherapy and asked her how she felt about all that, the woman would be assured her parents went off the deep end
It's quite simple. Band-aid versus cure. Trying to drive a wedge between the daughter and her husband is a band-aid. She will still be left with the same problems and will likely make the same mistakes again. It is far better to find a cure, and to do that you have to understand the cause, the motivation, the foundation for the behavior. If you understand the cause/motivation (which the parents clearly had a hand in), then they can approach the daughter in a much more productive fashion. Women don't stay with sex offenders and physically abusive men unless then have some esteem, etc. issues, and typically if they are rid of one loser they find/are prey to someone very similar.

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

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#41
Nov 2, 2012
 

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PEllen wrote:
<quoted text>
How would that be productive? The damage is done unless they have younger children at home.Would it help any for LW to berat herself for what has happened to her daughter. Too attenuated for my taste.
The grown daughter is not litening to them now. If they suddenly went through a course of psychotherapy and asked her how she felt about all that, the woman would be assured her parents went off the deep end
I actually think that it would help me a great deal to have my mother apologize for making me eat my veg when I was younger.

She takes absolutely no blame for how I turned out and the problems I have with food. I would like to hear, just once, in a calm, thoughtful manner that yes indeed, some of this is on her.

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