Abby 8-23-14

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#1 Aug 23, 2014
DEAR ABBY: I am a 12-year-old girl, and my grandpa is 75. I love him very much, but I have noticed lately that he stares at women's breasts when they are jogging, and he smiles when a gust of wind blows a girl's skirt up. This embarrasses me, and I am embarrassed for him. He must have realized it by now.

Is my grandpa a creepy, dirty old man? I hope it's not true. Please answer this in the newspaper because I don't want my family to see it.-- CARRIE IN CLEVELAND

DEAR CARRIE: I'm sorry, but the fact that your grandfather would be so unsubtle as to act this way when you're with him is creepy, and I'm sure it is embarrassing. Tell your parents about it so your mother or father can tell him to tone down his "enthusiasm." And if it doesn't happen, spend less time with Grandpa.

DEAR ABBY: My fiancee, "Caitlyn," and I are in our 40s and have been living together for a year. My family has invited us to go on a cruise for New Year's, all expenses paid. Because Caitlyn can't get time off from her job at the hospital, she doesn't want me to go, either.

Also, in the fall I will be traveling to Europe with my dad to visit relatives.(He's 80.) These trips don't happen all the time; it's an unusual year.

Should I refuse the cruise and miss out on being with my extended family to stay home with her while she works? I think Caitlyn's being selfish to expect me to. We spend all our free time together. We have been to Las Vegas and on a cruise recently. Please advise.-- HELD BACK IN OHIO

DEAR HELD BACK: You and Caitlyn are adults in your 40s. At that age, Caitlyn should be independent enough to tell you to go and have a good time with your family. And you should be mature enough to discuss this with her without involving me.

DEAR ABBY: My sister loaned me her car when she went out of town so I could drop her at the airport and pick her up.(I don't have a car of my own, but share one with my husband.) While I was driving her car, one of the tires blew. She says I should pay for the replacement tire because I was driving the car on an errand that was unrelated to picking her up when the tire blew. I disagree. Who is right?-- JENNIFER IN FLORIDA

DEAR JENNIFER: If the agreement between you and your sister was that her car was to be used only to take her to the airport and pick her up, then you owe her a new tire. However, if her tires were so worn that they could cause an accident, then she should replace her own tire -- and the other three as well.
Cass

Rancho Cucamonga, CA

#2 Aug 23, 2014
LW2 - Are you sure you are in your 40s? You act like you are 14.

LW3 - Your sister is. You were driving the car. The tire blew. You replace the tire.
Pippa

Hancock, NY

#3 Aug 23, 2014
1: Grandpa IS creepy. Go ahead and tell him your self how his behavior bothers you. I can see this would be difficult for you; so tell your mom or dad and ask them to talk to him. In the meanwhile, spend less time alone with Grandpa. Definitely tell your parents too if he behaves or says anything inappropriate to you. You should not have to feel uncomfortable in your grandpa's presence. Perhaps he's becoming senile and needs medical help. Telling your parents might encourage them to seek help for Grandpa. When my f-i-l was in his 80s, he developed a brain tumor and behaved in some really bizarre ways which were not really his fault and not really HIM.

2: Yes, grow up already. As long as you have no intention to get involved with or even flirt with other women while on these vacations with your family, there shouldn't be a problem. Your lady friend does not own you any more than you own her. Even spouses are allowed out on their own to visit family now and then.

3: And just how long and how many personal miles did you use the car? I am not counting the trips to the airport. I've never heard of a tire simply blowing out if it was in good condition. It would likely have blown out on the way to or back from the airport to pick up your sister if you hadn't used the car in the meantime. Seems your sister is taking advantage of you. Check the tread wear on the tire. If it is really worn, that will tell the story. If it was a new tire, perhaps there was a manufacturer defect. In any case, tires wear out and I don't think that's your responsibility. She'd have had to replace the tire very soon anyway.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

#4 Aug 23, 2014
Cass wrote:
LW3 - Your sister is. You were driving the car. The tire blew. You replace the tire.
No. Her car, her responsibility. I would never expect anyone else to do maintenance on my car simply because they happen to be driving it. Hey, you surpassed the three thousand mile mark too, pay for my oil change

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

#5 Aug 23, 2014
Quite the b*tchass response to l2

l1- your grandpa is my hero
Pippa

Hancock, NY

#6 Aug 23, 2014
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>
No. Her car, her responsibility. I would never expect anyone else to do maintenance on my car simply because they happen to be driving it. Hey, you surpassed the three thousand mile mark too, pay for my oil change
While I would not expect the lw to pay for an oil change if her personal miles were under say 100-200 miles. I would expect anyone borrowing my car to keep it in good condition and pay for any damage they do to it or that occurs while in their keeping. I'd let them know that ahead of time so there'd be no misunderstanding. I don't think a blown tire falls into that category. Am I right in assuming those only happen when the tires are worn or does it happen regardless of tire wear? If it can happen simply due to the way someone is driving or because they drove into some kind of obstacle, then yes, I think I might expect them to pay for that as long as the tire had otherwise been in good condition.
Julie

Chicago, IL

#7 Aug 23, 2014
[QUOTE ]DEAR ABBY: I am a 12-year-old girl...[/QUOTE]
LW1: Of *course* you are <roflmao>
Only a naive idiot with absolutely no life outside of Topix would believe this <facepalm>
Pull the other one!

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#8 Aug 23, 2014
Cass wrote:
LW3 - Your sister is. You were driving the car. The tire blew. You replace the tire.
Bullshit. Unless she ran up on the curb and popped the tire, she does not owe her sister jack. Sister puts 40,000 miles on the tire and thinks she should get a new tire cause it blew during the 300 or so miles her sister put on it at the end of its life? What f#<kery is this?

What if the radiator sprung a leak? Or the battery died? Or the AC stopped working? If I house sit while you're out of town and the roof starts to leak or a tree falls on the roof, do I fix that too cause I was using the house?

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#9 Aug 23, 2014
Pippa wrote:
Am I right in assuming those only happen when the tires are worn or does it happen regardless of tire wear? If it can happen simply due to the way someone is driving or because they drove into some kind of obstacle, then yes, I think I might expect them to pay for that as long as the tire had otherwise been in good condition.
Sure, but there you go again assuming the worst of the LW. If she drove into something that directly cause the tire to blow, then its her responsibility.

But going at face value, that's not what she describes. Tires DO just blow. Sometimes do to over wear, Sometimes due to manufacturer defect. Hell, some years back, there was a huge recall on the Firestone tires used on the Ford Explorer because they were blowing left and right and putting drivers in extreme danger. Firestone recalled MILLIONS of tires.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Firestone_and_Fo...
Kuuipo

Salinas, CA

#10 Aug 23, 2014
LW1: Men, regardless of age, look at women. It's in their DNA. However, I agree w/Abby that your grandfather should employ subtlety when doing so in your presence.

LW2: You should be able to go on the cruise and to Europe without Caitlyn if she cannot arrange time off work and she should not expect you to stay home. However, maybe you could stay home for New Year's and go on the family vacation to Europe to appease her. Your call.

LW3: I've had my share of flat tires. Never had one blow for no reason. Once, it was due to wear. Most other times it was due to punctures, which normally can be plugged for $10 or so. Once, I had a piece of metal puncture my sidewall and had to replace the whole tire, but that was a very unusual occurrence. So my answer is, depends on the circumstances. If the tire was worn, it was your sister that put the majority of the miles on that blown tire. If the tire was punctured, you should have it plugged and pay for it. If the tire blew due to an unusual puncture, you should pay for it. If the tire blew due to a manufacturer defect, your sister should pay for it and get reimbursed for all or part of the cost. Now I'll just say this. Maybe your relationship with your sister is worth more than the cost of the tire regardless of who "should" pay.

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