abby 3-2

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“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

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#1
Mar 2, 2013
 
DEAR ABBY: I am a 14-year-old female from the West Coast. I am home-schooled and don't have many friends because I score high in tests, meaning I retain more information than the average person.

On the rare occasion that I mingle with children my own age, they call me unpleasant names, play pranks on me and otherwise torture me. I had to change my emergency cellphone number and start using my sister's because there have been so many immature and insulting prank calls.

I hate it. I can't help that I am smart, and I refuse to degrade myself by dumbing down my actions and speech because they can't handle their insecurities.-- HIGH IQ

DEAR HIGH IQ: Being "different" isn't easy, and clearly you are very intelligent. But you and your parents should understand that crank calls are not "pranks" -- they are a form of bullying and should have been reported when they happened.

Most parents who home-school also network with other home-schooling parents so their children can socialize with peers. If your parents haven't done this, I recommend you discuss it with them. You might also meet more intellectually advanced young people if you joined special-interest groups for older students.

Your high IQ might be less threatening to the students who have given you trouble if you volunteer to tutor some of them who need help with their schoolwork.(Just don't fall into the trap of doing it for them.)

DEAR ABBY: I have been with my boyfriend, "Dan," for almost five years. He's wonderful and we have a great relationship. We have talked about spending our lives together, but had mutually agreed in the beginning that marriage wasn't a priority for either of us. He has said for years that he never wanted to marry -- which is fine with me.

I now suspect that he's planning to propose to me on our fifth anniversary.(He has never been great at hiding surprises.)

I'm thrilled that he wants to make that kind of commitment, and I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with him, but the thought of marriage scares me. I don't know if it's nerves about the pending proposal or that I have never planned on marriage and now I have to think about all the stress and strife that comes with planning a wedding.

I want to say yes, but I love the way things are right now, and I know that marriage will change things. What, if anything, do I say to him?-- COLD FEET? IN SALT LAKE CITY

DEAR COLD FEET?: I wish you had mentioned why you think being married to Dan would "change things." If you've been happy together for five years, it's unlikely that making a formal commitment would damage the special relationship you have together.

Perhaps this is "old school," but I feel that if couples plan to bring children into the world, they should be married. Because you want nothing more than to spend the rest of your life with Dan, and are concerned about the stress of planning a wedding, when he pops the question, I suggest you say, "Yes -- why don't we elope

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

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#2
Mar 2, 2013
 

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LW1 Your parents have done you a serious disservice. You may have brains but you lack social skills and without those your brains won't have opportunity to be used. Your letter is snooty and condescending and it is pretty clear you av little awareness of how you are perceived. I don't condone bullying and teasing, but I am sympathetic to the impulses of teh kids you have gone after you.

You need to be with other people your age.

LW2 I understand. If there is no formal commitment, each of you is free to leave when you want to, and by extension, if your partner is with you, it is because he wants to be there, not because he has to be there.

After 5 years you should have a good handle on this insecurity, because that is what it most likely is. Keep telling yourself he is the one asking so he is teh one who wants this. Don't loe a good man because of your cold fet.

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

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#3
Mar 2, 2013
 

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L1: This is NOT about being smart. You can be smart and still be funny, friendly, and act your age. Abby's advice about the homework sucks; my advice is to get down off your high horse - make sure you don't break an ankle, you're way up there - and stop being condescending to your peers. They ARE your peers, even if you have a higher IQ than them.

L2: First of all, you could be worrying about nothing. Dan might not propose. Since you're psyching yourself up for it, how are you going to feel if you guessed wrong? That might tell you a lot in and of itself. Anyway, if he DOES, and you do have hesitations, DISCUSS them with him.

Since: Mar 09

Pittsburgh, PA

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#4
Mar 2, 2013
 

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I see Sheldon Cooper is now a 14 year old female.

“suffers from formicophilia ”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

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#5
Mar 2, 2013
 

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1- You are NOT that smart, you whiny, better-than-everyone, my-shit-don't-stink, holier than thou, spoiled little BRAT! It's just something your liberal, hippie parents tell you while they're out in the garage smoking a bong.

2- Abby, where did she mention anything about plans to bring children into this world?
not a ghost

San Antonio, TX

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#6
Mar 2, 2013
 
These both look fake. The second one is better written, but i don't think either one is real.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#7
Mar 2, 2013
 

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VAdame -- hilarious!!!

L1: Exactly what everyone else has said so far. Sorry they're not smart enough for you. Throughout life you will meet people of all different intelligence and each one can teach you something. Right now they can teach you how to be a human being instead of just a brain.

L2: Yes, I don't see the kid thing either in the letter. It sounds as if the LW is afraid of the ceremony and not the actual marriage thing. That's just stupid (I'm not trying to sound like L1). You don't have to have a ceremony -- you could get marriage at city hall, in your backyard or wherever.
Kuuipo

Salinas, CA

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#8
Mar 2, 2013
 

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LW1: I'm going to give LW the benefit of the doubt. Someone, probably one of her parents, has told her not to dumb herself down to fit in with others her age. I remember a particular guy from my junior high school who was ridiculed mercilessly because of his intelligence and vocabulary. He's probably CEO of some giant corporation now and fabulously wealthy with a trophy wife. We all agree that her lack of social skills is a problem and will almost certainly hold her back. She desperately needs to learn how to fit in with a group. She should try something completely out of her comfort zone, like sports, dance, art, or music. That will give her some humility and a creative outlet as well.

LW2: He's wonderful and you have a great relationship? You don't have a problem! You can have a casual, fun ceremony at the beach, the park, or a small hall.

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