Chicago Improv Festival Set to Warm Up Chicago With LOL Comedy
Laughter is the best medicine, which means the 17th annual Chicago Improv Festival from March 31 to April 6, 2014, promises to remedy Chicagos winter blues.
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#1 Mar 19, 2014
1: You and your husband may be adults but you don't seem to be entirely acting that way. Here's a clue. If you or your husband were single and moved back home to live with mom and dad, you'd be subject to their house rules. Their house, their rules. That's just the way it works. Even though you're married with kids, the same applies. You may be paying rent and for your food, but you are still under their roof sharing their living space. You are not living in separate quarters. That said, your m-i-l sounds as though she's being unreasonable - at least from your perspective. She may see a lazy woman whose kids are rude, disobedient, or even completely out of control. Did you ask your husband if she is expecting the same thing from her grandchildren as she expected from him? If so, you shouldn't be surprised. This is how she expects kids to behave.
I knew a woman whose son and his family lived in the upstairs apartment in her house. She said the kids were very badly behaved. I knew them and had to agree. She said they learned proper behavior when they came downstairs to visit her. They learned to behave one way, with respect, in her home but behaved in their usual way in their parents' home. I told her I'd found the same situation with kids in school; they learned that certain behavior and language for example might be ok with their parents but was inappropriate in school. Most usually learned to adapt to a second set of rules. Maybe your m-i-l is actually doing you a favor by insisting your kids behave. We don't really know what the specific things are that you are complaining about. You may be entirely in the right about what's going on. The lack of specific examples make me suspicious. My advice? Get at least a part time job when your husband is home to supervise the kids. I don't see you being happy about grandma babysitting them. Save up enough money for the first month rent and security and move out of your in-law's house. Be polite to your in-laws. They didn't have to let you move in with them and to have you there for a close to a year is very patient and kind on their parts.
Oh yes, in regard to your b-i-l: Is he supposed to be taking medication for his condition? Is he taking it? You might talk to your in-laws in a calm, non-confrontational manner about this. I assume the b-i-l is an adult. His parents may not have the control over his medication that they'd like to have. Consider that his condition is already stressful for these people. Having your family living there can only add to that stress. Perhaps family counseling would help all of you learn how to cope with his illness. My husband and I took our adult son for family counseling to help him learn how to cope with situations that always caused him frustration which would lead to his acting out in inappropriate ways. My husband and I learned some ways to help him cope with those issues and how we ourselves could help. Believe me, life is so much better now. Perhaps this kind of thing could work for your family. I suggest you, your husband, in-laws and b-i-l seek counseling regarding the b-i-l's condition. It would help him as well as the rest of you. I've heard that when one member of a family has a mental illness, the whole family has an illness since the relative's illness affects them all.
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