Amy 10-6

[edogxxx]

DEAR AMY: I live in a community that has one gentlemen's club. This club is an upscale, classy strip club with award-winning food.

This business really takes care of the local residents and members of the community -- from contributing to schools to supporting food pantries. It is the only strip club that has been allowed to remain in our community, and that's because it's not your "normal" kind of club. It's really a cut above, and that's why we allow it to be here.

For instance, every year they offer free flu shots to seniors, accompanied by a free buffet (their menu is not cheap).

My husband and I would like to bring them something this year to show thanks, but we don't know what would be appropriate to convey to all employees how much we appreciate them.

They contribute so much! Any thoughts?-- Grateful Residents

DEAR GRATEFUL: I'm going to leap right over any suggestion of tips slipped into G-strings and suggest that the "classiest" thing to do is to write a letter to the management, asking them to share it with their staff. In this letter you will thank them for hours of high-class enjoyment, award-winning food and contributions to the community.

This will prove to the establishment that they have successfully paid off the community and will encourage them to continue -- which will in turn guarantee that they will continue to corner the market share of high-class entertainment in your town.

I know -- I'm such a cynic.

DEAR AMY: My parents are both in their late 70s. Their health is getting bad. There is a dark secret in the household. At least once a week my father gets falling-down intoxicated. This upsets my mother. Everyone thinks they are a very happy couple.

I worry that if something happens to mother and he is needed he cannot help her. I think they should separate and let him continue to keep his dirty little secret.-- Upset Child

DEAR UPSET: If you are worried that your mother won't have anyone to help in case of an emergency, then encouraging your parents to separate doesn't seem a wise choice -- unless she could live with a responsible family member.

You are obviously very upset -- for good reason. The way to channel your concern is to lift this secret out of the dark and do your best to shed light on the problem in a way that is constructive.

You (and siblings, if you have them) should acknowledge this to one another and to your father. Tell him you are worried about his alcohol use. He might be able to modulate this somewhat on his own, or he might need professional help.

You should look into getting a "medical alert" panic button your mother can use if she or your father has an emergency. This could be a lifesaver.

DEAR AMY: I agree with "Upset Reader" that you owe an apology to "Shocked," who asked a question about two women who wore white to a wedding. I shared the letter and your response with several people, and we all felt that she was merely asking a question and that the only thing that was "rude and unkind" was your response.

Why do you suppose so many people felt that way and yet you only defended your response? We all think you totally read something into her question that was not there and answered very unkindly.-- Still Wondering

DEAR STILL: What I responded to was a tone -- but also a judgment by "Shocked" that two guests wearing white to a wedding constituted a crime so wrong as to be labeled "shocking" and "horrifying" and worthy of tableside gossip at the reception.

"Shocked" didn't really have a question. She wanted me to agree that this fashion choice was wrong and possibly a deliberate attempt by these guests to upstage the bride. It seems to me that weddings should represent a peaceful and joyful merging of different points of view, but so often these events are preceded by discord and followed by gossip.

[edogxxx]

1- Best way to show support of a business is to patron them. You and hubby should go for a lap dance every week. Love how Amy is appalled.

2- Life alert is always a good idea. Let the man have his fun, you can't drink when you're dead.

[PEllen]

Its on my mind because of the kittens, but the strip club is doing a Hester Prynne/ Scarlet Letter. Sexual profligacy redeemed in the community's eyes by charity and good works. Hey, it worked for 18th century Massachusetts

[j_m_w]

edogxxx wrote:

1- Best way to show support of a business is to patron them. You and hubby should go for a lap dance every week. Love how Amy is appalled.

HAHA! And yeah, clearly Amy's pulling duty this weekend instead of handing it off to an intern.

[Cass]

LW1 - Still trying to wrap my mind around the oxymoron "classy strip club"...Award-winning food? Yeah, people go to strip clubs for the food. And they subscribe to the Playboy for the articles.

By the way, does Zagat review strip clubs?

LW2 - Assisted living time.

[cheluzal]

1: I was thinking the same thing: "classy strip club" is an oxymoron and who cares about food?
Honestly, the establishment's history had NOTHING to do with the question.
There is a local business we want to thank. How do we? It's like they want to brag about it....what a nutterball in a weird town. Our school would never let a strip club be listed on programs as a contributor, rightfully so. That's just tacky.

2: Life alert. This must suck but sometimes you have to let adults fall on their own. Your dad sounds like one of those people.

[edogxxx]

Come on, now. Some strip clubs are more classy than others... Or so I've heard.

[PEllen]

edogxxx wrote:

Come on, now. Some strip clubs are more classy than others... Or so I've heard.

Right. Like teh one down by you that doesn't have a liquor license, makes patrons BYO and then dumps teh drunk guys in their cars to freeze or drive drunk.

That was all over the news a couple years ago

[Kuuipo]

Cass wrote:

LW1 - Still trying to wrap my mind around the oxymoron "classy strip club"...Award-winning food? Yeah, people go to strip clubs for the food. And they subscribe to the Playboy for the articles.
By the way, does Zagat review strip clubs?

Maybe it's like that movie "Gypsy" where the stripper only takes off one long white glove.

[Toj]

L1: This is weird. I would have any type of strip joint, classy or otherwise, be involved in the schools. The should stick to adult themes. The seniors, yes. Hey, you don't disappear once you hit 70! The letter thing is a good idea. And yes, Amy seems upset over it. She needs to grow up.

L2: They're in their 70s -- leave them alone. They can decide if they want to separate. If you're worried about mom, then contact the local services to get her into programs where they can help. It's not the LW's place to decide whether or not her parents should stay together -- unless the husband is abusing her.

L3: Bet the LW is planning her wedding, is a bridezilla and is polling her bridesmaids.

[Mister Tonka]

Cass wrote:

LW1 - Still trying to wrap my mind around the oxymoron "classy strip club"

I ain't been to a strip club since the last bacelor party i went to, but there's definitley a difference between the seedy dive bar and the "high class" gentleman's club.

Cass wrote:

...Award-winning food? Yeah, people go to strip clubs for the food.

I doubt anyone goes FOR the food. But I have read about places that stepped up thei food game to equal 5 star sreak places. Never been, but I know there is a place with several Florida locations called Rachel's Steakhouse.

[Mister Tonka]

http://www.esquire.com/blogs/food-for-men/str...

http://i.gadling.com/2010/11/30/top-five-stri...

[Toj]

Mister Tonka wrote:

http://www.esquire.com/blogs/f ood-for-men/strip-club-food-09 0710
http://i.gadling.com/2010/11/30/top-five-stri...

I can only imagine when you combine sex with great food -- you've GOT to bring in more men. AND it's a good excuse for the men to bring their wives and gfs. Some people like to bring their significant others. I can't imagine that would be the norm, though. Then again, I wouldn't really know. Whatever floats your boat, though (2 consenting adults and all that). Perhaps the LW from Abby today should go with her husband to a classy strip club. Might spark something!

[RACE]

1 Written by a former pole dancer who married a patron.

[Pixx]

LW1: I went to my first strip club last weekend. It was quite an experience.

LW2: "At least once a week my father gets falling-down intoxicated." This happens to me at least twice a week. I'm glad I'm not married to your mother. Then again, I'm a grad student, so this is expected of me.

[edogxxx]

Mister Tonka wrote:

there's definitley a difference between the seedy dive bar and the "high class" gentleman's club.

$5.00 lap dance = seedy dive bar

$20.00 lap dance = high class gentleman's club.

Or so I've heard...

[j_m_w]

I've only ever been to strip clubs with guys (friends or boyfriend)... never been to a chippendales show or anything where the guys strip.

[j_m_w]

edogxxx wrote:

<quoted text>
$5.00 lap dance = seedy dive bar
$20.00 lap dance = high class gentleman's club.
Or so I've heard...

I guess I've been to middle-of-the-road strip clubs:$10/lap dance.
:)

[Mister Tonka]

Toj wrote:

I can only imagine when you combine sex with great food -- you've GOT to bring in more men.

Sex? Despite what you may have heard, there is no sex in the champagne room.

https://www.youtube.com/watch...

[Toj]

Mister Tonka wrote:

<quoted text>Sex? Despite what you may have heard, there is no sex in the champagne room.
https://www.youtube.com/watch...

Sex without the act. Sex is more than the actual act.

I've heard there are rooms in some places that for a price you can get a bj. That leads me to believe for a bigger price you can go home with the prize -- but I'm sure it's not said it's sanctioned by the establishment.

It's just what I hear. I would actually know. So, perhaps Tonka you need to step out of the champagne room and go to the -- what? coke room or whatever? Must be the dive places. Ha!

(I realize probably know I have no idea but it sounds good.)