Dear Abby 6-27

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Lady Lake, FL

#1 Jun 27, 2010

DEAR ABBY: I am 18, disabled, and work with a service dog. I would like to offer people a few tips on interacting with service dog owners. Perhaps it will lessen some of the daily frustrations all handlers deal with:

1. Not all service dogs are big dogs. I know several Chihuahuas who save their owners' lives every day with their medical alert tasks.

2. Not all disabilities are visible. Please don't ask, "What's wrong with you?" or, "What's your problem?"

3. There are many kinds of service dogs, not just guide dogs. Medical alert dogs help people with everything from epilepsy to diabetes to panic attacks. There are also autism service dogs, mobility dogs and hearing dogs.

4. Please do not pet my dog without asking me first. My dog wears a patch that says, "Do Not Pet." It's there for a reason. Abby, I can't count the number of people who read her patch out loud, then reach out to pet her anyway. Please do not take it personally if we say no.

5. If a dog's handler seems ill, it's OK -- even preferable -- to ask if we are all right. I once had an episode and no less than two dozen people walked right past me while I sat on the floor. Had I been diabetic, I could have died because no one stopped -- including two store managers.-- HOPING TO HELP IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR HOPING TO HELP: Thank you for an important letter. What many people fail to understand is that when an assistance dog is out in public, the animal is working and should not be distracted from its task -- which is ensuring the well-being of its owner.

Your last tip was the most important of all. Folks, I shouldn't have to tell you that if you see someone who appears to be in trouble, it takes only a moment to do the right thing and make sure the person gets the help he or she needs. And that includes calling 911 if it's merited.

DEAR ABBY: I am a widowed grandmother. Two of my son's children, ages 18 and 21, have never had much contact with me or my husband. I have mailed them gifts for their birthdays and holidays, never receiving a thank-you or a card or a call on my birthday. To keep the peace, I have kept sending -- but now I'm tired.

They used to live in Arizona, but now the older granddaughter, "Bethany," lives here in Florida, 40 miles from here. When she came with her parents to stay with me while house-hunting, she asked, "What are you going to give me for my birthday?" I did not respond.

After Bethany became established and settled, I called her on at least four separate occasions, leaving messages, all of which she has ignored. She claims she never received them. My birthday came and went -- no card or call from her. I feel I should do the same for her from now on. I would like your opinion so I can show it to my son.-- UNAPPRECIATED IN FLORIDA

DEAR UNAPPRECIATED: Here it is, and by all means, share it with your son. Bethany is the product of her upbringing. You were not a part of her childhood in Arizona, and she was never taught that good manners mean acknowledging gifts and returning phone calls.

She is no longer a child, and she was presumptuous to ask you what you would be giving her for her birthday.(You should have replied, "Malaria. Do you want it now?") If you choose to stop acting like a vending machine -- which is the way you are being treated -- you'll get no argument from me.

“Where is Tonka?”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#2 Jun 27, 2010
1 Ha! Do not pet! Then they do it. Kinda like the "Wet Paint" sign... Tazer them!

2 Why not ask what she is giving you for your birthday?

“What's it to ya?”

Since: Mar 09

Location hidden

#3 Jun 27, 2010
1: Nice PSA. Yawn...

2: OMFG really? Yawn

edog you working again this morning?

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Lady Lake, FL

#5 Jun 27, 2010
Mimi Seattle wrote:
edog you working again this morning?
No ma'am. Just stayed up past my bedtime as an act of defiance.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Lady Lake, FL

#4 Jun 27, 2010
LW1: Blah!

LW2: She expects gifts out of you by now. Good response by Abby.

Since: Jan 09

Location hidden

#6 Jun 27, 2010
As soon as I saw the headline, I groaned inside.

Let's see how long it takes. 3...2...1...

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#7 Jun 27, 2010
LW2: Your grand daughter puts no value on your relationship other than that of a birthday gravy train. I see no reason to continue.

“Snow days!”

Since: Nov 08

A winter wonderland

#8 Jun 27, 2010
L1- Nice of Abby to print this week's PSA. Do most people not know this?
L2- I like the malaria remark. Send Bethany an invoice.

North Bergen, NJ

#9 Jun 27, 2010
lw2-Bethany is an adult. Treat her like an adult. Send her a card at most. Wonder what Gmom sends her son and dil? I have NO family left. I am/was the one who had to buy presents for his family. Sent cards to friends and family, but as life is, did not get much back. SO, Gmom should do what I did. Cut back the list. My MIL just passed away this year, but we still had to buy her birthday presents.(cake and presents for the grandkids, grandmas, but not the parents). Better yet, get demanding. Demand that Sonny, who hasn't been in the picture for years, have him and his family take her out for her birthday. Maybe then she will at least get a happy birthday out of bethany.

Plant City, FL

#10 Jun 27, 2010
1: Please stop trying to convince me your stupid fluffball in the restaurant is necessary for dealing with your ADD.

2: Why do people need affirmation to treat adults like adults?
Annoyingly, I wonder how many of these morons still choose not to do what's right.

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