Comments
1 - 17 of 17 Comments Last updated Oct 15, 2012

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

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#1
Oct 15, 2012
 
DEAR ABBY: I work in a professional office where nearly all my co-workers are married and live rather uneventful lifestyles. I was divorced a few years ago and have not remarried.

I have dated a lot of women, and it has become an issue with my co-workers. They insist on hearing about the dates I go on and ask for the details of what took place, and I usually oblige them.

Lately, there has been more and more gossip about my so-called "wild lifestyle," and I have become the talk of the office. Some co-workers have called me names like "skank" because I refuse to settle down with one girl. I'm looking for the right one, and it may take many wrong ones to get there.

I think my co-workers are jealous. I'm living my life to the fullest and having fun and because they can't do what I do, they resort to gossip and name-calling. It really frustrates me. How can I make this stop without causing unnecessary tensions in my workplace?-- MAN IN MOTION IN INDIANA

DEAR MAN IN MOTION: You are not a "skank." You are a bachelor. I hope you realize that you started this by regaling your co-workers with the intimate details of your "adventures." None of it was appropriate workplace conversation. If you want this to stop, you'll have to draw an iron curtain between your work life and your social life. Start today.

DEAR ABBY: I am engaged and have been for a while. From the beginning I knew my fiance and I would have to pay for our own wedding. During a recent discussion with my father (who is divorced from my mother), he offered to chip in a reasonable amount and asked me to see if my mother would match it. My mother thought it was a great idea and agreed. A week or so later she wrote me a check for the amount and I deposited it into my savings account.

At the time, I had a high-paying job and a "roundabout" wedding date set. I have since left my job and the wedding has been postponed indefinitely. My mother has now requested that I return the money because she's behind on bills.

Frankly, I think it is inappropriate for her to ask me to return "her" money when it was a gift that I did not request at the time. Am I wrong, or should she leave the money be?-- ENGAGED IN VIRGINIA

DEAR ENGAGED: When your mother gave you the money toward your wedding, both of your financial situations were different than they are today. This isn't a question of etiquette. Because you won't be needing it in the near future, return the money to your mother so she can pay her bills. It's not as if she'll be using it for a Caribbean cruise. She needs the money!

DEAR ABBY: My daughter and her husband have a wonderful little boy, "Matthew," who is 3. They say they don't plan on having any more children. I am upset that they won't be giving my grandson a sibling. They claim the reason is to be earth-friendly, but I think it is selfish. I know my urging won't change the situation, but it weighs heavily on my mind and makes me sad for Matthew.

My daughter has a brother she is close to. Her husband has two siblings. I think the main reason they don't want any more children is my son-in-law is 17 years older than my daughter. Is there any good way for me to tell her how upset this makes me?-- DISAPPOINTED IN OREGON

DEAR DISAPPOINTED: No, there isn't. There may be reasons that go beyond your son-in-law's age for their decision to limit the size of their family to one child. And they are none of your business.

Since: Jan 10

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#2
Oct 15, 2012
 
L1: People called a guy a "skank"?

L2: Shame on you! You voluntarily left a high paying job an dnow your life is in limbo. You KNOW your mom gave you that money to go toward the wedding. RETURN IT YOU EFFING LOSER.

L3: selfish? Why don't you shrivel up already? Grow up, you idiot. I can't believe how idiotic you are for being this upset.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#3
Oct 15, 2012
 

Judged:

1

LW1: "How can I make this stop without causing unnecessary tensions in my workplace?"
Keep your yap shut about your dating life, dumb ass.

LW2: "asked me to see if my mother would match it. My mother thought it was a great idea and agreed."

"Frankly, I think it is inappropriate for her to ask me to return "her" money when it was a gift that I did not request"

WTF? Did not request? She gave you money THAT YOU ASKED FOR as a giftto help pay for your wedding. If this wedding is not going to happen, geive her her damn money back.

LW3: "I am upset that they won't be giving my grandson a sibling."
"I think it is selfish."
"Is there any good way for me to tell her how upset this makes me?"

Tell me again who's being selfish? Crusty old hag.

Since: Mar 09

United States

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#4
Oct 15, 2012
 
L1: Stop oversharing at work.

L2: You quit your job and your wedding is on hold indefinitely? Sounds like you tried to scam money from your parents, and it worked initially. But you're busted.

L3: Ahhhh! Stop! Nunya!

“Fort Kickass”

Since: Sep 09

Bloomington, IL

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#5
Oct 15, 2012
 
L1: Grow a pair and stop oversharing, hussy.

L2: What everyone else said.

L3: I kind of want to hurt you.

“Licensed to Ill”

Since: Aug 08

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#6
Oct 15, 2012
 
LW1: Donít tell folks at work about your private life anymore.

LW2: What a con. Return the money.

LW3: MYOB.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#7
Oct 15, 2012
 

Judged:

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L1: I'm with Red. Who calls guys skanks? I wonder if this letter is written by a woman and wrote in as a guy. Anyways, shut just your trap on your personal life.

L2: You are a brat and self-centered. Bet this chick spent part of the money. Give your mother any interest that it earned as well.

L3: Your daughter isn't your own personal breeder of grandchildren. Unbelievable.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

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#8
Oct 15, 2012
 

Judged:

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Toj wrote:
L2: You are a brat and self-centered. Bet this chick spent part of the money. Give your mother any interest that it earned as well.
Does anyone really earn any significant amount of interest thru regular bank accounts?
pde

Schaumburg, IL

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#9
Oct 15, 2012
 
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Does anyone really earn any significant amount of interest thru regular bank accounts?
In the past few years, even CDs have been barely paying anything interest-wise.

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

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#10
Oct 15, 2012
 
I love monday morning softball questions!

LW1: Stop sharing.

LW2: Return the money.

LW3: Shut up.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

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#11
Oct 15, 2012
 
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Does anyone really earn any significant amount of interest thru regular bank accounts?
Not that I know of. I don't like her attitude so even if it's 20 cents she needs to give it to her.
Sam I Am

Huntingdon, TN

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#12
Oct 15, 2012
 

Judged:

1

1. You have a big mouth and you're paying for it. did you really think that your boring, married co-workers would just listen to your adventures and move on? Shut up once in awhile.

2. Wow. You SUCK.

3. I want you to get a disease that itches and oozes constantly and makes it difficult for you to control your bowels.

Since: Nov 10

Brooklyn, NY

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#13
Oct 15, 2012
 
L3- Be happy you got a grandchild. Don't be greedy.

Since: Dec 07

DuPage County

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#14
Oct 15, 2012
 
L1: You created this mess ya' idjit. Stop reacting to the stuff at work and it'll stop.

L2: The LW needs a good throat punch.

L3: Grandma, go get a job at McDonald's or someewhere to give you something else to obsess unnecessarily about.

“It made sense at the time....”

Since: May 09

Schaumburg, IL

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#15
Oct 15, 2012
 
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Does anyone really earn any significant amount of interest thru regular bank accounts?
my 92YO gramma is whining about how little itnerest she's earning on a savings acount that will outlast her, even with the high monthly cost of a nursing home and other end of life care that she's facing.

Depression Era mentality, i guess, or antoehr sign that makes me not entirely sure that she really gets that she's terminally ill...

i call my savings account hte FDIC Backed Mattress.

“It made sense at the time....”

Since: May 09

Schaumburg, IL

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#16
Oct 15, 2012
 
LW3 - shut up.. nothing good will come of THAT conversation with the daughter & SIL.

and who knows, maybe they reluctantly had one kid to get you to leave them alone about when they were going to ahve ANY kid at all...
Stina

Saint Petersburg, FL

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#17
Oct 15, 2012
 
LW1 - Name calling is a bit much, but if you don't want people to give you a hard time about stuff then don't talk about it. Heck I work in an environment where we know EVERYTHING about each other - I even know when some co-workers got vasectomies. Of course we made fun of them for it....

LW2: Wow - this LW is a selfish twit. She DID ask for the money. She left a good job and postponed her wedding, which is what the money was for! Give the cash back and if your mother wants to help when you finally move forward, then great.

LW3: You have no right to say what they should do. While I agree that it would be better for the kid to have a sibling, it is EXPENSIVE to have a kid! Have you ever thought of that???

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