“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#1 Dec 2, 2013
DEAR ABBY: My little girl was born with a heart defect. She made it through the first heart surgery, but passed away a week later right in front of me while the doctors and nurses tried to save her.

As the date of her death gets closer, I am becoming more and more depressed. How can I remember her and share my memories in a good way when all I want to do is stay in bed and cry?-- HEARTBROKEN MOMMY IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR MOMMY: I am so sorry for your loss. A way to remember your little girl and share those memories would be to contact a group called The Compassionate Friends. It's a national self-help support organization for families grieving the death of a child and was started to help families cope with the loss of children of any age and from any cause.

It sponsors a worldwide candle lighting on the second Sunday of December each year. The event is held at 7 p.m. local time and lasts for one hour. Services are also held throughout the day in hundreds of locations in all 50 states and Washington, D.C., as well as in other countries around the world. You can post a memorial message for your daughter in the online memorial book.

To locate a service near you and learn more about the work this organization does and what it offers, visit www[dot]compassionatefriends[d ot]org, or call toll-free 877-969- 0010. This is a valuable resource for anyone who has lost a child.

DEAR ABBY: I recently went on a business trip that required me to share meals with my co-workers. I became the target of criticism from them over my eating habits because I like to eat my dessert first. It doesn't keep me from eating the rest of the meal; I just do it in a different order than most people.

When the subject came up, I tried to explain that because I wasn't allowed to do it as a child, I swore that when I was an adult, I'd eat my food in any order I wanted. But lately, it has failed to diffuse the tension.

I don't think I'm being rude. I do this only at restaurants where it's possible to order dessert at the same time as the meal. I'd never do it when I'm a guest in someone's home.

Do you think I'm being rude? Should I eat in a more conventional way to avoid flak from people I'm dining with?-- SWEET TOOTH IN COLORADO

DEAR SWEET TOOTH: I'm not your mother, so I'll refrain from lecturing you about the empty calories you consume, which reduce your appetite for the healthy food you "should" be eating at mealtime. And yes, I do think what you're doing is rude because it is obviously making your eating companions uncomfortable, or you wouldn't be getting flak along with your dessert.

DEAR ABBY: After 31 years of marriage, my wife and I have split up. We love each other, but after the kids moved out we realized we have little in common.

What is an appropriate Christmas gift for an ex-wife? We are on friendly terms and will probably spend the holidays together with our children. I don't want to give a gift that will offend or encourage her.-- FREE MAN IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR FREE MAN: How about a gift card from her favorite store, or a lovely scarf or colorful shawl, or if she has a hobby, something to do with it? None of them would send the wrong message.

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#2 Dec 2, 2013
LW 2. me me me me me. I get to do just what I want to do me me me

Nutrition aside, fragrance is a large part of food. I don't want to smell your spaghetti sauce and garlic bread and Italian salad dressing when I am eating my chocolate cake.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me!

#3 Dec 2, 2013
1 PSA, but the holiday's are a crappy time if you have lost someone recently.

2 G*d damn right you can eat your dinner in any damn order you want! Screw them! Tell them when they are buying, you will eat in the order they would like. Oh, and lookey! Theirs an empty table over there if they dont like it.

3 Maybe if you had put this much thought into buying her gifts during the time you were married, you still would be.

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

#4 Dec 2, 2013
LW1: Stay in bed and cry all day. Then call the number.

LW2: Oh, grow up already! Of course you can eat your dessert first, but then don't whine about getting flak for it.

LW3: Yawn.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#5 Dec 2, 2013
Lw2: lw is probably making more of a big deal outta this than the others. I don't see why anyone else would give a rat's ass other than to good naturedly bust your balls. And abby, fu. He's being rude cause his food choices allegedly make others uncomfortable. So if my dining companions are vegans, i'm rude for enjoying a steak? If there's one vegan at the table, he's rude for eating ruffage only. You're an idiot.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Chicago, IL

#6 Dec 2, 2013
2- Expect flak if you're gonna eat like an idiot in public!

"I do it now because as a kid I wasn't allowed to.."

PUKE! Grow up! Does this mean that now you're a wh0 re because as kid you weren't allowed to have sex?

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#7 Dec 2, 2013
I knew someone who was not allowed to have mayo growing up. Left home and began having mayo sandwiches every now and then. White bread and mayo...just because she could.
Kuuipo

Monterey, CA

#8 Dec 2, 2013
LW1: I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a child is just awful, regardless of age or circumstances. I hope you do call the number.

LW2: Team RACE. Who cares what anyone else eats? They are the rude ones. When I was a kid, I used to eat one thing at a time and I didn't like my food mixed up. My parents, particularly my dad, used to tease me about that. I grew out of that phase. I would not appreciate being teased about my food choices today.

LW3: Team RACE again. Maybe you should have worked on creating "things in common." Or just appreciated each other for who you are. I know a woman whose husband loves to play golf. She hates golf. Once in a while, she'll go to a golf party with him, but otherwise she does what she loves to do - dance hula. They have a great marriage despite their different interests.
boundary painter

San Antonio, TX

#9 Dec 2, 2013
Compassionate Friends is exactly what LW1 needs.

Agree with RACE's answers on LW2 and LW3.

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#10 Dec 2, 2013
LW1: Maybe therapy would be helpful.

LW2: You still act like a child. You are also too dopey to realize that when you are at a business function there is certain etiquette that you should follow, lest folks judge you adversely and it affect your career. Id say being an odd ball nut, who absolutely must eat dessert before his dinner, because like every other child in the world he wasnt able to do this as a child, makes you look foolish and odd in the eyes of your co-workers.

LW3: Black rose? ;p

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

#11 Dec 2, 2013
Sublime1 wrote:
LW1: Maybe therapy would be helpful.
LW2: You still act like a child. You are also too dopey to realize that when you are at a business function there is certain etiquette that you should follow, lest folks judge you adversely and it affect your career. Id say being an odd ball nut, who absolutely must eat dessert before his dinner, because like every other child in the world he wasnt able to do this as a child, makes you look foolish and odd in the eyes of your co-workers.
LW3: Black rose? ;p
I'm all for doing what you want eating-wise (I sometimes have tuna subs for breakfast), but I have to agree that you have to adjust for certain situations. I wouldn't eat a tuna sub at a business breakfast. Though I do eat it at my desk...
tiredofit

Los Angeles, CA

#12 Dec 2, 2013
L2:

As a child from a large family, I said I was going to make a pan of brownies and eat it all myself when I grew up. Did I do it as an adult, NO.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me!

#13 Dec 2, 2013
Gee.... Thats tough! Why not?
First thing I did when I bought my house was hold the door open and "air conditioned the whole damn neighborhood!"
tiredofit wrote:
L2:
As a child from a large family, I said I was going to make a pan of brownies and eat it all myself when I grew up. Did I do it as an adult, NO.

Since: Mar 09

West Palm Beach, FL

#14 Dec 2, 2013
I've eaten pints of ice cream for dinner before... by myself, in front of the TV.

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

#15 Dec 2, 2013
When I was a depressed teenager, on the weekends I spent with my dad I would mix up a batch of brownies and then eat the batter all weekend (refridgerated over night of course).

I'm much better now.

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

#16 Dec 2, 2013
j_m_w wrote:
I've eaten pints of ice cream for dinner before... by myself, in front of the TV.
When I was pregnant with Lulu, Dickie was often away at rehearsals or at the studio, so I was on my own for dinner a lot. He'd come home and ask what I had for dinner, and I would have to confess that dinner consisted of a pint of ice cream. He would sigh and remind me that ice cream is not dinner.

Now I have to share the ice cream!

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