Abby 10-31

Posted in the Chicago Forum

Comments

Showing posts 1 - 16 of16

“suffers from formicophilia ”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#1
Oct 31, 2013
 
DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend, "Mark," and I have been together for a year. We met at work, and have dated ever since. Several months ago we were offered a job opportunity in another state. We moved in together and are happy.

My problem is, over the past few months we have been living together, our personal relationship has come to a halt. We still care about each other deeply, but no longer do the things couples do. We don't go out on dates or see the new city we've moved to.

Do you have any advice on how I can get Mark to go out and see the sights without sounding whiny or pushy?-- BALTIMORE AND D.C. BECKON

DEAR BALTIMORE: Tell Mark the two of you appear to have become housebound and you don't think it's healthy -- particularly because Baltimore and Washington, D.C., have many entertainment and cultural opportunities to offer. Then create a "bucket list" and have him choose from the menu of choices that are available. If that doesn't inspire him, ask him to create a list, or start exploring on your own.

If you are successful at getting Mark out of the house, it may liven up your relationship. But if it doesn't, you may have more serious problems to deal with, and a heart-to-heart talk with him about your entire relationship is in order.

DEAR ABBY: My son's birthday was yesterday. I invited him to dinner at a very nice restaurant. When he showed up, he had two other men with him. They didn't offer to pay for their food, so I had to pay for all of us.

My son is 32, and I would like to say something about this to him. Or should I just not invite him to nice dinners out?-- TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF IN SUGARLAND, TEXAS

DEAR TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF: No. Say something to him. And when you do, it should be something like this: "Son, springing unexpected guests on your host is bad manners. You should have asked permission first. I was appalled that your friends didn't offer to share the expense. Please don't do that again because if you do, I'll stop inviting you."

DEAR ABBY: My parents divorced many years ago. Dad started dating and moved in with a woman I'll call Crystal a few months later. They stayed together for several years. I lived with them part-time then, and eventually only occasionally. I don't have a good relationship with my father.

Since then, he and Crystal have broken up and Dad moved away. I never felt particularly close with her, but she calls and emails me incessantly, begging me to spend time together. She even refers to her daughter as my "sister." She never showed much interest in me when we lived together, and I'm confused how to respond.-- BEWILDERED

DEAR BEWILDERED: Crystal may be attempting to maintain a presence in your father's life by continuing a relationship with you. The next time she emails, email her back and point out that your father has moved on with his life, and it is time for her to do the same because you are busy.

A NOTE TO PARENTS OF YOUNG CHILDREN: Tonight is the night when wee witches and goblins collect their loot. Please supervise them so they'll be safe. Happy Halloween, everyone!-- ABBY

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me!

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#2
Oct 31, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1 the thrill is gone, and you are left only with the stark, glum reality that is the rest of your life.

Enjoy!

2 Your son cant bring a date? Obviously your son is gay and poly. He simply brought his husbands to dinner with him on his very special day. You probably ruined it for him.

Dont be surprised if he says thanks for nothing!

3 Ungrateful wench! This woman practically raised you, and thinks of you as her own kin, and abby is telling you to dump her like a sack of manure.

Evil Eye to both of you!

“The two baby belly, please!”

Since: Sep 09

Evanston IL

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3
Oct 31, 2013
 
How about asking others to watch out for the wee goblins? Kids getting hit by cars on Halloween IS a reality, unlike the fiction of tainted candy.

Toj

“Equality”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#4
Oct 31, 2013
 

Judged:

1

L1: Here's an idea -- ask him out. Make a date night. Join something together. The issue here is the woman doesn't know how to communicate with her boyfriend.

L2: He's 32 and you can't talk to him. Hmmm....

L3: Crystal is lonely. You need to tell her to move on. She'll find her own life. Don't let her hijack yours.

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#5
Oct 31, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1. I'm with Toj
2.It sounded like he ca,me with protection either from you or someone else. You are probably right to be scared of him. Send hm gifts in the future .
3. I'm with Toj

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#6
Oct 31, 2013
 
LW1: What Toj says.

LW2: Your son's a jerk adn so are his friends.
pde

Schaumburg, IL

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#7
Oct 31, 2013
 

Judged:

1

LW1: You say "wouldn't it be nice to go to x?" When he agrees, you say "let's buy tickets for x for next Friday evening". You buy tickets for x and go.

If he does not agree, you say, "Well, I would like to go to x" and buy a ticket for x, and go.

Basically, you take the initiative on making some plans.
Blunt Advice

Elizabeth, NJ

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#8
Oct 31, 2013
 
1. You dated a coworker then after a few months moved in with him in another city?? How many other huge mistakes have you made?
2. Next time you invite him out make the dinner reserrvation for a table for 2. Let him know ahead of time. Then if he brings friends they are SOL.
3. She needs to move on. If you don't speak to your father, why would you have contact with his ex gf? She is using you to get back at him.

“This is SPARTA!”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#9
Oct 31, 2013
 

Judged:

1

Stina2 wrote:
LW1: What Toj says.
LW2: Your son's a jerk adn so are his friends.
Why are the friends jerks? I would imagine the son told them dinner was on mom

“This is SPARTA!”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#10
Oct 31, 2013
 

Judged:

1

RACE wrote:
1 the thrill is gone, and you are left only with the stark, glum reality that is the rest of your life.
Enjoy!
2 Your son cant bring a date? Obviously your son is gay and poly. He simply brought his husbands to dinner with him on his very special day. You probably ruined it for him.
Dont be surprised if he says thanks for nothing!
3 Ungrateful wench! This woman practically raised you, and thinks of you as her own kin, and abby is telling you to dump her like a sack of manure.
Evil Eye to both of you!
lw2: that would be hilarious if it was just the son and his bf and mom was just clueless
Kuuipo

Monterey, CA

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#11
Oct 31, 2013
 

Judged:

1

LW1: Team Toj and maybe get some counseling or read some books about communicating effectively.

LW2: What you should have done is tell the waiter to split the check so that you paid for you and your son and the two uninvited guests paid for their own meals. Then you should have told your son that you would appreciate it if he would ask you ahead of time if it is OK to bring other guests. You can still tell him that, but the meal is water under the bridge now.

LW3: You sound kind of cold, but I don't know how your father and Crystal are, so maybe I'm being too judgemental. Is it possible that you resented having your life turned upside down when your parents divorced? Did you act out because of that resentment? Was Crystal your father's mistress and do you blame her for breaking up your parents' marriage?

You could choose to have lunch or dinner with Crystal once and assess her motives. Maybe she genuinely cares about you after all. And what is your "sister" like? You're not obligated to maintain a relationship with her, but she was a parent figure in your life and therefore "family". You didn't say that she was evil or abusive. Right now, she sounds lonely and nostalgic. Your call, but I recommend having one dinner with her to wish her well.

“suffers from formicophilia ”

Since: May 09

Chicago, IL

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#12
Oct 31, 2013
 
PEllen wrote:
2.It sounded like he ca,me with protection either from you or someone else. You are probably right to be scared of him. Send hm gifts in the future .
No, it sounds like he's taking advantage of his mom's generosity. The time to say something was when the check came.

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#13
Oct 31, 2013
 
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Why are the friends jerks? I would imagine the son told them dinner was on mom
Didn't think of that.
But I would probably think it odd, at that age, if someone said their mom was taking him to dinner and that she said to invite some people.
Julie

Skokie, IL

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#14
Oct 31, 2013
 
LW2: Your son obviously doesn't want to spend time alone with you. The question is: Why?

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#15
Oct 31, 2013
 
Julie wrote:
LW2: Your son obviously doesn't want to spend time alone with you. The question is: Why?
Bingo
cheluzal

Plant City, FL

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#16
Oct 31, 2013
 
2: Definittely saying split the cheeck before ordering. So tacky.

3: I wouldn't email her back. She hasn't gotten the message yet, so she's probably thick. Block her.

Tell me when this thread is updated: (Registration is not required)

Add to my Tracker Send me an email

Showing posts 1 - 16 of16
Type in your comments below
Name
(appears on your post)
Comments
Characters left: 4000
Type the numbers you see in the image on the right:

Please note by clicking on "Post Comment" you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

19 Users are viewing the Chicago Forum right now

Search the Chicago Forum:
Topic Updated Last By Comments
BARACK OBAMA BIRTH CERTIFICATE: Suit contesting... (Jan '09) 11 min Justice Dale 167,504
Barack Obama, our next President (Nov '08) 1 hr John Galt 1,033,330
Once slow-moving threat, global warming speeds ... (Dec '08) 2 hr Lord Hater 42,961
Messianic Jews say they are persecuted in Israel (Jun '08) 2 hr JOEL 65,068
Ill. House Approves Legalizing Same-Sex Civil U... (Dec '10) 3 hr Dusty Mangina 47,034
Who Dodged the SHOE Better? 4 hr ThomasA 17
Song Title Game (Dec '11) 4 hr SLY WEST 1,020
Topix Chitown Regulars (Aug '09) 4 hr loose cannon 96,071
•••
•••
•••

Chicago Jobs

•••
•••
•••

Chicago People Search

Addresses and phone numbers for FREE

•••

Personal Finance

Mortgages [ See current mortgage rates ]
•••