Since: Jun 09

Madison, WI

#21 Aug 20, 2012
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
Just have another baby, cycle. ;)
I wouldn't mind another one, but my wife is 46. Chances are getting slimmer and slimmer, especially with a 42 lb c*ckblock at home.

Since: Jun 09

Madison, WI

#22 Aug 20, 2012
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
Every bedtime ritual you create becomes something the kid NEEDS in order to sleep. My friends -- and Nick -- who refused to do any bedtime rituals have kids who go to bed easy peasy. The ones who add reading, songs, etc., have a lot more trouble getting the kids to sleep.
OH, and I know that a large part of the problem is our own making. With a kid like mine, it takes A LOT of focused energy and consistency to get her sleeping habits in order.

It's getting better. She sleeps by herself most nights, and my wife tries not to fall asleep in there. We still have to send her back to her room many times. She came downstairs twice last night, acting sweet and cute and loving (Oh, she's a master manipulator. She knows that acting like the thing she needs most is a hug from her daddy will get her some sympathy. She never acts out when she comes down past bedtime. She's always this sweet, loving girl that is lonely and just needs someone to hold her. <sigh>). My wife also had to threaten to lock her out of our BR is she came in one more time. She ended up sleeping along, though.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#23 Aug 20, 2012
cycle003 wrote:
My wife also had to threaten to lock her out of our BR is she came in one more time. She ended up sleeping along, though.
Why threaten? Why not just do it? My wife routinely locks the door when she's taking a nap so they can't get in and bother her. After a few futile attempts to enter your room, maybe she'll give up.

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#24 Aug 20, 2012
I have friends who would walk their baby/toddler around in their arms, and would spend literally 20 minutes saying goodnight to various inanimate objects around the house. One friend would whip out her boob (regular nursing long over) so her 3yo could be comforted while going to sleep.

Even if I were a parent, I think I'd think "knock that shit off."

Since: Jan 10

Location hidden

#25 Aug 20, 2012
cycle, I don't mean to make a mountain out of a molehill, but I wonder whether family therapy or parenting classes, with focused advice on your specific situation, might help. Take her "I don't want to be lonely" and put that in high school or college, and she could make some very poor choices, just to not be "lonely." I think that's the bigger issue here -- learning to entertain and enjoy being by herself (as all kids need to learn). Her temperament may make that a much tougher thing to learn and understand than it does for other kids. You obviously have tried various things. Maybe it's time for a professional to make specific recommendations based on experience with kids like her.

Just my two cents.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#26 Aug 20, 2012
Put a tv in her room and let her fall asleep to a disney movie.

Since: Jun 09

Madison, WI

#27 Aug 20, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
Put a tv in her room and let her fall asleep to a disney movie.
That's what *I* want to do. My wife doesn't like TV and doesn't want to give her more time watching TV. I think this would fix the sleeping issue.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#28 Aug 20, 2012
cycle003 wrote:
<quoted text>
That's what *I* want to do. My wife doesn't like TV and doesn't want to give her more time watching TV. I think this would fix the sleeping issue.
It might also create a bigger monster but your wife doesn't like it so it's out anyways.

How about a radio or her favorite CD (could be a disney movie on CD) on low volume?

Don't they have books where you get the book and CD/mp3 where she could following along? Save those for when she goes to bed and have her read/listen by herself.

Since: Jun 09

Madison, WI

#29 Aug 20, 2012
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
cycle, I don't mean to make a mountain out of a molehill, but I wonder whether family therapy or parenting classes, with focused advice on your specific situation, might help. Take her "I don't want to be lonely" and put that in high school or college, and she could make some very poor choices, just to not be "lonely." I think that's the bigger issue here -- learning to entertain and enjoy being by herself (as all kids need to learn). Her temperament may make that a much tougher thing to learn and understand than it does for other kids. You obviously have tried various things. Maybe it's time for a professional to make specific recommendations based on experience with kids like her.
Just my two cents.
While I'll admit that I worry about the post-pubescent version of my kid, I don't believe for one minute that any parenting class or therapist is going to be able to change a child who prefers not to play or be alone. The only part that I think needs to be changed is her sleeping alone and at the prescribed time.

Since: Jun 09

Madison, WI

#30 Aug 20, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>Why threaten? Why not just do it? My wife routinely locks the door when she's taking a nap so they can't get in and bother her. After a few futile attempts to enter your room, maybe she'll give up.
Oh, we have. It creates more drama than results. The *threat* of having it locked works better than actually locking it.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#31 Aug 20, 2012
cycle003 wrote:
<quoted text>
That's what *I* want to do. My wife doesn't like TV and doesn't want to give her more time watching TV. I think this would fix the sleeping issue.
Introduce your wife to the back of your hand!

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#32 Aug 20, 2012
I dont recall having too much trouble. I always patted her back as she lay in her crib (it turned into a day bed as she got older) and she never got up so much (we always had the monitor going so we would hear when she woke up. Amazing how you train yourself to wake up from a dead sleep like that)

I think the patting was probably very similar to what I did when I held her as a baby (and of course that patting often resulted in a belch or belch/vomit)
Julie

Chicago, IL

#33 Aug 20, 2012
RedheadwGlasses wrote:
L2: Considering that you had unprotected sex wtih four different men in a short amount of time, I wouldn't want your child exposed to YOU. Give it up for adoption. You're not ready to be a parent.
This. And I'll add: Hey LW2, you wanna see a picture of yourself? Go to the dictionary and look up Stupid Slut. Get your tubes tied, you f'ing moron.

Since: Feb 08

Location hidden

#34 Aug 20, 2012
cycle003 wrote:
<quoted text>
That's what *I* want to do. My wife doesn't like TV and doesn't want to give her more time watching TV. I think this would fix the sleeping issue.
There are audio books for kids. No light, no picture, but a soothing voice telling a story might help. You could even make your own audio files of you or your wife reading stories for her and have those playing in her room.
But I'm with (red?) who said that she needs to be able to be alone sometimes, being that needy later on is only a gateway to problems.
Stina

Saint Petersburg, FL

#35 Aug 21, 2012
NWmoon wrote:
<quoted text> There are audio books for kids. No light, no picture, but a soothing voice telling a story might help. You could even make your own audio files of you or your wife reading stories for her and have those playing in her room.
But I'm with (red?) who said that she needs to be able to be alone sometimes, being that needy later on is only a gateway to problems.
I used to put on "Saying the Rosary with Mother Angelica" on the Catholic channel. We aren't catholic, but it wasn't entertaining enough for her to actually watch and the steady, quiet rhythm of the chanting put her to sleep within minutes. It was like a magic potion.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#36 Aug 21, 2012
Yeah, but now she has been subliminally brainwashed by them. Dont be surprised when she becomse a nun.
Stina wrote:
<quoted text>
I used to put on "Saying the Rosary with Mother Angelica" on the Catholic channel. We aren't catholic, but it wasn't entertaining enough for her to actually watch and the steady, quiet rhythm of the chanting put her to sleep within minutes. It was like a magic potion.
Stina

Saint Petersburg, FL

#37 Aug 21, 2012
RACE wrote:
Yeah, but now she has been subliminally brainwashed by them. Dont be surprised when she becomse a nun.
<quoted text>
Somehow I don't think that will be much if a cincern!
Kuuipo

Monterey, CA

#38 Aug 21, 2012
Stina wrote:
LW2: Holy cow!!! Please, please, ploease, please find a nice family to adopt this child. You sleep around like a common street walker (well, maybe not - I imagine a common streetwalker actually uses protection) and now you have to play a game of "Wheel of Father". You can't even handle your own life - how are you going to raise a child???
Exactly! Please give the child to a nice stable couple who wants a family.
RACE wrote:
2 Listen little whoore, you aint no prize for a mommy either. Oh, and how nice to say the guy need to cough up the coin, but no mention of his rights to be involved in the kids life. Daddies are just money trees.
Daddies are 50% responsible for making children, so they should be 50% responsible for supporting any children they make. And YES, they should be involved in their child's life and setting a good example as the child matures. That goes for mommies, too. Which brings me back to Stina's post. Neither mommy nor daddy 1, 2 or 3 are ready to be parents. Adoption is a good option.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#39 Aug 21, 2012
Kuuipo wrote:
Daddies are 50% responsible for making children, so they should be 50% responsible for supporting any children they make.
And they are 0% responsible for the final decision on whether or not a child will be born. Let's not gloss over that.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#40 Aug 21, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>And they are 0% responsible for the final decision on whether or not a child will be born. Let's not gloss over that.
When men carry the baby nine months and give birth to it, then they can have the final decision.

Men have their fair share of say in adoption.

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