Kuuipo

Monterey, CA

#25 Apr 9, 2014
LW1: I have a gay friend who was raised Jehovah's Witness, and I can almost guarantee LW that he will not be surrounded by nothing but luuuuuve and support when he comes out. My friend and his mom will always have a challenging relationship because Mother does not approve and has never accepted his orientation. She still wants him to date women.(eyeroll) LW, your best bet is to graduate, get a job in San Francisco, New Orleans, or New York, and make some new friends after relocating.

LW2: Those terrorist kids are dealbreakers, IMHO. Break it off now. The temporary pain will subside.

LW3: I love my scented lotion! I just put some on to cyber-annoy LW.

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

#26 Apr 9, 2014
_Annabella_ wrote:
<quoted text>
Or that they actually take the time to do so. Guess having no real life explains it.
:)
I was thinking the same exact thing. And I don't care what happened 6 years ago. Everyone was just having fun and killing time. If things happened elsewhere, who cares? And who can be bothered looking up ancient posts.

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

#27 Apr 9, 2014
ScarletandOlive wrote:
LW1- Toj for the win!
LW2- this guy only sees his teenagers twice a week. His girlfriend, who does not live there, says that she tries to make herself scarce when they are over. Um, why is she intruding on his time with his kids to begin with? It's one thing to see them occasionally or for special events, but I would bet that they grew resentful of her trying to get between them and their father when she had just started dating him. By now, they want nothing to do with her.
Yes, the father should set some ground rules, including that his children be civil and respectful to his girlfriend and any of his friends. Still, I would bet that she made a bunch of missteps at the beginning of her relationship with their father that are going to be hard to overcome.
Excellent point on LW2!

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

#28 Apr 9, 2014
ScarletandOlive wrote:
LW2- this guy only sees his teenagers twice a week. His girlfriend, who does not live there, says that she tries to make herself scarce when they are over. Um, why is she intruding on his time with his kids to begin with?
Well, God forbid she makes her presence known to his children and get involved and get to know them.
ScarletandOlive wrote:
It's one thing to see them occasionally or for special events, but I would bet that they grew resentful of her trying to get between them and their father when she had just started dating
Now you're just speculating (not that there's anything wrong with that, that's what we do here) but they've been dating for a year. Maybe she was scarce at first but after a year? Come on.

I think the real issue the kids feel she is the reason for the divorce (and I think their mother had a lot to do with that...) No matter how she behaved, she had some whopping strikes against her from the very beginning.
boundary painter

San Antonio, TX

#30 Apr 9, 2014
Glance into the future on LW2:

During the summer:

(a) Those teen agers told her why they don't like or trust her.
(b) She criticized the teens to their father and he began to spend less time with her.
(c) The man reconciled with his wife and let LW2 go.
or
(d) other

“An Apple a day”

Since: Jun 08

nil carborundum illegitemi

#31 Apr 9, 2014
Stina2 wrote:
<quoted text>
I was thinking the same exact thing. And I don't care what happened 6 years ago. Everyone was just having fun and killing time. If things happened elsewhere, who cares? And who can be bothered looking up ancient posts.
Evidently there are those who care a great deal. LOL

Perhaps having fun is not a concept with which they are familiar. Oh well, each to their own.

:)
cheluzal

Plant City, FL

#32 Apr 9, 2014
Toj wrote:
L2: The problem isn't the teenage children, it's the guy who doesn't insist that the children respect you. It's been a year and a half. It's probably never going to happen. I'd move on.
Exactly.
I broke up with the only guy I dated who had an ex-wife because he would never stand up to her! His kids were awesome and we got along fine, but the ex is bat-crap psycho crazy and lied about me and manipulated the kids and he always took her side.
Sorry, buddy---not happening.
His oldest apologized to me later and cut his mom off.
Ex remarried some girl after me and is already wrapping up divorce #2. Fool.

“ouch!”

Since: Mar 14

Australia

#33 Apr 9, 2014
Stina2 wrote:
<quoted text>
I was thinking the same exact thing. And I don't care what happened 6 years ago. Everyone was just having fun and killing time. If things happened elsewhere, who cares? And who can be bothered looking up ancient posts.
Wow! This sounds interesting!
Have you got a link to where all this excitement is going on?
Thank you for whetting my appetite.
Julie

Chicago, IL

#34 Apr 9, 2014
LW1: You don't have to worry about coming out, cuz your "friend" Renee is going to out you.

LW2: There is nothing good about this relationship. End it.

“Checks and Balances”

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#35 Apr 9, 2014
edogxxx wrote:
<quoted text>Well, God forbid she makes her presence known to his children and get involved and get to know them.

ScarletandOlive wrote, "
It's one thing to see them occasionally or for special events, but I would bet that they grew resentful of her trying to get between them and their father when she had just started dating "

Now you're just speculating (not that there's anything wrong with that, that's what we do here) but they've been dating for a year. Maybe she was scarce at first but after a year? Come on.

I think the real issue the kids feel she is the reason for the divorce (and I think their mother had a lot to do with that...) No matter how she behaved, she had some whopping strikes against her from the very beginning.
Total speculation, based on the way she phrased some things. Also some bias on my side from seeing this happen several times in my family (yes, Dad is a dbag for trying to force his new girlfriend on the kids, but I think that the girlfriends share the responsibility of acting like adults and remembering that this is a lot for the kids to take in).

I'll also admit to personal bias that in most cases I don't think people should be moving in with someone who has kids. If you want to make a commitment, that's one thing, but you don't get to do the "let's see if this works out" thing when there are minors who will come to depend on you. Their foundation has already been shaken enough.
edog

Wilmington, IL

#37 Apr 9, 2014
ScarletandOlive wrote:
(yes, Dad is a dbag for trying to force his new girlfriend on the kids.
Who said THAT ever happened?
ScarletandOlive wrote:
I'll also admit to personal bias that in most cases I don't think people should be moving in with someone who has kids.
She's not. She has her own place

Do you mean ever? So if I'm dating a divorced woman who happens to have kids, we could never move in together?
ScarletandOlive wrote:
If you want to make a commitment, that's one thing, but you don't get to do the "let's see if this works out" thing when there are minors who will come to depend on you. Their foundation has already been shaken enough.
In this case, the "minors" want nothing to do with her. Should the relationship end because of what his kids want, or because of what his love wants?

Not an easy question but at what point do you stop following your heart and follow the wants of your teenage children?

“Checks and Balances”

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#38 Apr 9, 2014
edog wrote:
<quoted text>

Not an easy question but at what point do you stop following your heart and follow the wants of your teenage children?
I'll answer this one, because it is easy. When you have minor kids, you make decisions that are in their best interest. That doesn't mean that they get to call the shots. It means that you don't get to make decisions without considering how they will impact the children that you chose to bring into this world while they are still dependent on you.

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#39 Apr 9, 2014
Oh Stina....
You and your glorious whip have summond the trolls from alabaster.
Why?
Why, when you could have used your powers for good, did you use them for evil?
Oh woe is the day...
pde

Bothell, WA

#42 Apr 9, 2014
Hmm. If you have a real account around here, is there a way to kill messages from people without real accounts?

If so, I'm getting to the point where actually remembering to sign in is starting to sound really good.

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

#43 Apr 10, 2014
The Blog Fodder wrote:
<quoted text>You two know each other?
What? Who? I have no idea what you mean.

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

#44 Apr 10, 2014
ScarletandOlive wrote:
<quoted text>
I'll also admit to personal bias that in most cases I don't think people should be moving in with someone who has kids. If you want to make a commitment, that's one thing, but you don't get to do the "let's see if this works out" thing when there are minors who will come to depend on you. Their foundation has already been shaken enough.
I agree with you totally on this.

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

#45 Apr 10, 2014
RACE wrote:
Oh Stina....
You and your glorious whip have summond the trolls from alabaster.
Why?
Why, when you could have used your powers for good, did you use them for evil?
Oh woe is the day...
Darn... now I have to smack MYSELF withthe whip!

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#46 Apr 10, 2014
Me first! Smack me first!
Stina2 wrote:
<quoted text>
Darn... now I have to smack MYSELF withthe whip!

Since: Jun 09

Saint Petersburg, FL

#47 Apr 10, 2014
RACE wrote:
Me first! Smack me first!
<quoted text>
Too busy taking your beer, remember?

“A Programmer is not in IT!”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#48 Apr 10, 2014
Well, here. Let me hold them for you!
Stina2 wrote:
<quoted text>
Too busy taking your beer, remember?

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