First Prev
of 4
Next Last

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#61 Oct 9, 2012
dahgts wrote:
<quoted text>
Long time ago my brother and SIL got divorced. My brother was in the wrong and a totally irresponsible person. Up until my mother died two years ago SIL every year sent flowers on her birthday and always kept in touch, cards, visits, etc.. She was there to help me clean out my mom's place and we're still in touch. She is a very nice person. My brother resented it and never understood how his actions affected his family.
After my divorce in 1980 there wasn't any contact with his family, which was fine with me, several of them were nuts. But recently through my son I've been around former SIL and we get along. The rest have died.
I guess it just depends on the family dynamics and how not dysfunctional people are. Not sure of the right word there.
Your SIL was more like family than the actual family. I do believe once someone marries into the family (or has a very close, commitment, long relationship with a member of the family), then that changes things because both are part of the family. It totally depends on the family dynamics at that point.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#62 Oct 9, 2012
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
Like JMW, I really think there's a different between dating someone for a bit and being married and becoming part of the family. I suppose I should have went into more detail. Once you're part of the family and entrenched, then things are different. But if you're dating someone, break up with them and then your family stays friends with them -- that's weird.
What if you've been dating for years and are not LEGALLY part of the family, but you are for all intents and purposes?

Since: Mar 09

Miami, FL

#63 Oct 9, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>What if you've been dating for years and are not LEGALLY part of the family, but you are for all intents and purposes?
In this context, I don't see this as being different from married.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#64 Oct 9, 2012
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>What if you've been dating for years and are not LEGALLY part of the family, but you are for all intents and purposes?
Addressed that in another response. I would say they're family. Some people may not but I would.
Kuuipo

Marina, CA

#65 Oct 9, 2012
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
Like JMW, I really think there's a different between dating someone for a bit and being married and becoming part of the family. I suppose I should have went into more detail. Once you're part of the family and entrenched, then things are different. But if you're dating someone, break up with them and then your family stays friends with them -- that's weird.
I'm friends with the family of the guy I once dated. Actually, I am still friends with him, too. It IS weird, but they are all really nice people and I love all of them. He has a big family and I only have some cousins that I rarely see. The guy that I was dating - let's just say we work better as friends. He recently had a medical emergency. His sister called me and I went to visit him in the hospital. There is no drama and we all get along great.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#66 Oct 9, 2012
Kuuipo wrote:
<quoted text>
I'm friends with the family of the guy I once dated. Actually, I am still friends with him, too. It IS weird, but they are all really nice people and I love all of them. He has a big family and I only have some cousins that I rarely see. The guy that I was dating - let's just say we work better as friends. He recently had a medical emergency. His sister called me and I went to visit him in the hospital. There is no drama and we all get along great.
Well, you broke up and remained friends. I can totally see that. It's when you have a bad break-up with a guy or don't remain friends with the BF but your family does (after just dating the guy) that I think is so unloyal to the family member.

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker
First Prev
of 4
Next Last

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Chicago Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
News Barack Obama, our next President (Nov '08) 1 min RoxLo 1,522,037
News BARACK OBAMA BIRTH CERTIFICATE: Suit contesting... (Jan '09) 1 hr Buster Steinbeizer 240,358
News Chicago Restaurants Rally Against Trump Immigra... 3 hr Truth 8
I think she is pissed. From a few years ago. 4 hr SENIORS READ-THIS 6
Topix Chitown Regulars (Aug '09) 4 hr RACE 105,131
Look at Minn. Maine & Michigan. 4 hr OUTLAW-HALAL-FOODS 13
{keep A word drop A word} (Oct '11) 4 hr RACE 10,582

Chicago Jobs

More from around the web

Personal Finance

Chicago Mortgages