“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#1 Nov 17, 2012
DEAR ABBY: My son, "James," is 25 and has been dating his girlfriend for three years. He has brought her over only five times.

This is his first girlfriend, and I think he is getting way too serious and thinking about marriage. While she seems nice, I do not think she's the right girl for my son to marry. James has not talked to me about marrying her just yet, but I think he knows I'm not a fan.

My question is, do I talk to my son about how I feel, or just bite my tongue and let him make his own decision, even though I think he'd be making a big mistake? Or should I say something and risk ruining our relationship?

James isn't the easiest person to talk to, especially when you don't agree with him. I'd hate to see him marry her and wind up divorced, knowing I might have been able to stop it.-- MOTHER KNOWS BEST IN NEW YORK

DEAR M.K.B.: At 25 years old, your son is an adult. A three-year relationship is not a whirlwind courtship. James and his girlfriend may already have an inkling about how you feel about her -- which is why you have seen them only five times in three years.

If you want any relationship at all with your son in the future, do not interfere. Let him work this out for himself. He may be your son, but he's no longer a child, so don't treat him like one.

DEAR ABBY: My wife thinks it's improper for my parents to include their grandson -- our 8-year-old son -- in their Christmas card photo. He's their only grandchild.

I have seen people include pictures of their pets, cars, boats and all sorts of other things in their photo cards. So why not grandchildren? My parents have pointed out that this is the only opportunity for their friends to see their grandchild, but my wife thinks he should be included only in our Christmas card. What do you think?--PULLED IN TWO DIRECTIONS

DEAR PULLED: I think your wife is selfish, judgmental, and should be ashamed of herself for wanting to deprive your parents in this way.

Now I have a question for you: What's her problem? It's obvious that she has one where your folks are concerned.

DEAR ABBY: I had a great friendship that I threw away. "Shane" and I got along really well and, frankly, we ventured beyond friendship multiple times when we lived near each other. I think the "relationship" was good for both of us. Then I lost my temper during a trivial argument, and now he won't talk to me. We live in different states now, so the phone is the only way for us to contact each other.

Abby, I know the falling-out is my fault. He said something that shouldn't have set me off the way it did. How do I fix this? I miss talking to him, and he won't answer my calls anymore.-- REGRETTING MY TEMPER

DEAR REGRETTING: It appears Shane has not only moved away but also has moved on. When you were neighbors, the friends-with-benefits arrangement might have influenced him to forgive you. However, because that "leverage" is gone, you should move on, too. If he is unwilling to talk things out, there really isn't a way to "fix" it.

And now, a life lesson: The next time you're about to say something you might be sorry for later, remember that you can't "unring a bell" and that it cost you a friendship.

Since: Mar 09

Pittsburgh, PA

#2 Nov 17, 2012
LW2 - What, the kid can't be in more than ONE picture? Is it gonna steal his SOUL, or what?

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Wilmington, IL

#3 Nov 17, 2012
1- Oh good heavens

2- Times 2

3- I can't believe there was one time you lost your temper and now he won't speak to you. You were probably no more than just a booty call and he's moved on.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#4 Nov 18, 2012
L1: You should be encouraging him to live independently and making his own decisions not contemplating how you're going to run his life.

L2: I really don't understand her problem.

L3: Write a letter how you feel, mail it and then leave him alone if he doesn't contact you.
boundary painter

San Antonio, TX

#5 Nov 18, 2012
LW1 is giving New York mothers a bad name.(If he hasn't kept other girlfriends hidden from her, her
son is one tragic puppet.)

LW2 has a wife with problems.

LW3 got the best answer from Toj.

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Chicago Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
Barack Obama, our next President (Nov '08) 7 min Barry Choomer Soe... 1,153,321
BARACK OBAMA BIRTH CERTIFICATE: Suit contesting... (Jan '09) 13 min Edmond Pulpo 181,728
Deat Abby 12-16 13 min RACE 67
CHICAGO BEARS ARE SHYT. Boycott them 20 min Sublime1 23
I want to join ILLUMINATI to become rich and fa... 26 min mr fred 1
Amy 12-17 1 hr RACE 6
Amy 12-18 2 hr RACE 4
Chicago Dating
Find my Match
More from around the web

Chicago People Search

Addresses and phone numbers for FREE

Chicago News, Events & Info

Click for news, events and info in Chicago

Personal Finance

Mortgages [ See current mortgage rates ]

NFL Latest News

Updated 8:21 am PST

NBC Sports 8:21AM
PFT Live: Bears talk with John Mullin, Week 16 picks
Bleacher Report 9:00 AM
NFL Playoffs 2014-15: AFC, NFC Postseason Predictions Heading into Week 16
NBC Sports 9:58 AM
Unnamed Bears "confused and uncomfortable" with benching Cutler
ESPN10:10 AM
Vegas reacts to Bears' benching of Cutler
NBC Sports10:10 AM
Is Chicago protecting Cutler's trade value by benching him?