“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Braidwood, IL

#1 Aug 11, 2014
DEAR ABBY: It disturbs me greatly that we keep reading about parents leaving their children in cars, whether it be absentmindedness, stress or downright intentional. It needs to stop.

I'm hoping car manufacturers can come up with an idea -- maybe a sensor that once the doors are closed and locked, should there be motion or a sound in the vehicle, the windows would automatically open, giving a passer-by a chance to see inside and maybe save a precious life.-- FRUSTRATED BY "PREMATURE" ANGELS

DEAR FRUSTRATED: You are not the only one who is disturbed by these recent tragedies. They are on the minds of a lot of people lately. Today's mail brought a suggestion from another reader who is hoping to put an end to the loss of these fragile young lives. A mother in Westland, Michigan, offered this:

DEAR ABBY: I have a suggestion for parents. Talk to your children when they are in the car with you. I always carried on a conversation, sang or counted to my kids, even newborns, and continued through the years they were rear-facing and forward-facing. It helped them to learn their ABCs, count, and even know where streets were. It was also a running reminder that someone very special was with me. I never listened to the radio, unless it was nursery rhymes on DVD or toddler songs. It not only helped me teach my children, but it also made driving fun and safe for the tiny passengers in my car.-- D.W.K.

READERS: A nonprofit group called KidsAndCars suggests that parents "place something they will need (when exiting the vehicle), such as a cellphone, handbag or briefcase, near the child in the back seat. Or keep a large stuffed animal in the child's car seat when it's not occupied. When the child is in the car seat, place the stuffed animal in the front passenger seat as a reminder that the child is in the back.

"And tell the child's day care center or baby sitter that they will always be called if your child isn't coming in as scheduled. If the child is absent without an explanation, the day care center or baby sitter is expected to contact a parent or another designated caregiver."

I would not recommend an automatic device because it could fail.

DEAR ABBY: I am friends with a couple who have been married for three years. I have worked with the wife since before their wedding. The wife is overtly sexual toward me and has cheated on her husband with many men during the last year.

I'll be changing jobs soon and think the husband should know what his wife has been doing. Should I send him an anonymous letter? Tell him in person? Or let him find out for himself in the future?-- TROUBLED FRIEND IN DETROIT

DEAR TROUBLED: Because the woman is "overtly" sexual with you, it's likely the husband already has an inkling. Whether you decide to tell him his wife is cheating with multiple men depends on whether you would want to be told. But this I can tell you emphatically: This information should not be conveyed in an unsigned letter from a "friend."

“...,to wit”

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#2 Aug 11, 2014
1.Some idiots do forget their kid is in the car, but many more find it inconvenient to unbuckle a sleeping child while they just go into the grocery store for a few items, like milk and peanut butter.
I don't have a solution. Because ours was a 2 parent family there was always an option of my husband watching the kids while I went to teh store.

Our girls were in day care. There were a couple of times when he and I thought the other was picking them up and they were "forgotten". Its still mortifying to remember, but at least not mortifying in a literal death sense. But we were lucky..

2. If LW has definite knowledge, he should tell the husband. That means he saw the wife and a guy pull into the NoTell Motel or if she propositioned him directly. Acting slutty is just acting slutty. Not nice but not adultery.

“reign in blood”

Since: May 09

Detroit, MI

#3 Aug 11, 2014
1- oh big deal, my mother left us in the car frequently

2- MYOB

“Where is Tonka?”

Since: Feb 09

Neda, stay with me! Charlie

#4 Aug 11, 2014
1 PSA Boring

2 Got any pictures of your wife naked? Want some?
not a ghost

San Antonio, TX

#5 Aug 11, 2014
Or: is that husband hoping LW2 will relieve him of that "wife"?

:)

“I looked, and behold,”

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#6 Aug 11, 2014
LW1: Think of the children! Of course, we should all be forced to pay $1000 more per car because of a few idiots who donít know when it is safe to leave a kid or pet in the car. The public hysteria over this phenomenon is getting old.

LW2: I have a suggestion too. Donít breed if you are so stupid that you could forget you have a kid in the car, regardless of whether it is hot outside or not.

LW3: MYOB. I also donít think it has anything to do with whether you would want to be told.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#7 Aug 11, 2014
L1 and L2: I really can't understand how you "forget" you have your child with you.

L3: I think Pellen is right.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#8 Aug 11, 2014
Toj wrote:
L1 and L2: I really can't understand how you "forget" you have your child with you.
L3: I think Pellen is right.
Not excusing it, but I can certainly understand how someone could forget. If your spouse takes the kid to daycare every day and this one day, you neef to do it? You get in your car. Baby's sleeping. You start to drive. Routine takes over.

I've had days where I needed to pick my son up. Not my normal routine. Not my normal route. Leave work. Start driving. Just like a normal day, you mentally go into autopilot. Then realize, sh!+. I needed to take the other way cause I gota go pick up lil tonka.

“I looked, and behold,”

Since: Aug 08

Location hidden

#9 Aug 11, 2014
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>
Not excusing it, but I can certainly understand how someone could forget. If your spouse takes the kid to daycare every day and this one day, you neef to do it? You get in your car. Baby's sleeping. You start to drive. Routine takes over.
I've had days where I needed to pick my son up. Not my normal routine. Not my normal route. Leave work. Start driving. Just like a normal day, you mentally go into autopilot. Then realize, sh!+. I needed to take the other way cause I gota go pick up lil tonka.
You remembered, tho. If I can remember I left my cup of coffee in the car, I better damn remember I left my kid in the car.

Toj

“Where is Everyone?”

Since: Jul 12

Location hidden

#10 Aug 11, 2014
Mister Tonka wrote:
<quoted text>
Not excusing it, but I can certainly understand how someone could forget. If your spouse takes the kid to daycare every day and this one day, you neef to do it? You get in your car. Baby's sleeping. You start to drive. Routine takes over.
I've had days where I needed to pick my son up. Not my normal routine. Not my normal route. Leave work. Start driving. Just like a normal day, you mentally go into autopilot. Then realize, sh!+. I needed to take the other way cause I gota go pick up lil tonka.
But to forget the kid YOU put in the car? I find that amazing. I can understand if you're suppose to pick up and then going on autopilot. You don't have the child yet to remind you.

Then again, I didn't have a quiet kid. No way I was going to forget.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#11 Aug 11, 2014
Sublime1 wrote:
<quoted text>
You remembered, tho. If I can remember I left my cup of coffee in the car, I better damn remember I left my kid in the car.
Sure. But its not hard to see how you might forget when you get lost in your normal routine. Like I said, I'm not saying its excusable.

“I Am Mine”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#12 Aug 11, 2014
Toj wrote:
<quoted text>
But to forget the kid YOU put in the car? I find that amazing. I can understand if you're suppose to pick up and then going on autopilot. You don't have the child yet to remind you.
Then again, I didn't have a quiet kid. No way I was going to forget.
Of course its more difficult to forget if the kid is making noise. But asleep?

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