Nah, in that case it was his presentation that he had bought it "for them", but then was trying to dictate her usage. If he'd said flat out he'd bought it for himself, it'd be different in my book.<quoted text>What is this, kindergarten. Either I can see who sent it or not. If the answer is "not", then we have a bigger problem. If the answer is that I "can", then the "when" is when I come across it. There is nothing gained by waiting.
I don't know if YOU commented on this other letter, so when I say "you", its generic, but I find it interesting that you peeps had a problem with the husband who did not want to let a wife drive HIS special car. Thought he was a dick and that she should have full access to his shit without needing to ask permission, but a dude who comes home and finds a flower delivery for his wife is a dick for looking at the note without asking permission.
On the kindergarten thing - to me, it's a boundary issue, and some people need to have that kind of control over their own stuff. I'm okay with that. If I got flowers, my husband would call and tell me I'd gotten flowers and when I asked him who they were from he'd tell me he hadn't read the card and I'd tell him to go ahead and read the card and he'd tell me I have to wait until I get home, just to make me suffer, and then i'd ask him to do me a favor and toss himself out the window and he'd laugh and smirk (you can hear it in his voice, trust me...). But whether he opened the card or not would depend on his mood that day.
If this situation were reversed, I'd tell him I was looking at the card but wasn't going to tell him who it was and he'd have to wait until he got home...
I should mention that we wrote our own vows and the minister said it was the first time he'd ever seen vows that included the word "chopbusting".