A-Rod's slam lifts Yankees
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#1 May 15, 2010
A-Roid only hit the grand slam because he took his One A Day HGH STEROID Vitamin. He doesn't deserve a World Series ring because he's a total disgrace to Major League Baseball. Lets look at his shortcomings: 1) He's on the roids; even John Cena has said A-bum should be in PRISON. 2) The illegal Texas Hold 'Em games with his Mob buddies Johnny Roast Beef and Jimmy Bag Of Donuts, betcha Bud Selig had a major seizure when he got wind of A-Bum's nocturnal high stakes card games where bookmakers are abound. 3) Knocking the ball out of Bronson Arroyo's glove in the 2004 ALCS with his Hamburger Helper mitts then taking hush money from the Mob afterwards. 4) Yelling HA! in Toronto, he's lucky Toronto native Neve Campbell didn't throw a martini in his face afterwards 5) The incident in Oakland where he violated Dallas Braden's pitcher mound and then called Braden "a nobody". Some "nobody" Braden pitched a perfect game on Mother's Day vs the Tampa Bay Rays!!!! 6) Robbing the owners of the Texas Rangers w/o a gun when he signed that obscene contract in 2000. and 7) He left his wife for some third rate call girl and then left her for that overrated Kate Hudson. Thank goodness the Mets DIDN'T sign A-Bum after the 2000 season because he would of destroyed that franchise w/ his bare hands and they probably would of moved to Vancouver or San Antonio. I rather cheer for David Wright, sure he strikes out too much but he's a role model for all of New York City because he RESPECTS the game (something A-Bum doesn't do whatsoever), lives a clean life and does a ton of charity work.
#2 May 15, 2010
Cheer up Mets fans !
I'm working on a deal with Omar Minaya to be a pinch running specialist and light a fire under the a-sses of these Mets.
It's also my understanding that Vince Coleman will conduct a fireworks show in front of the Mets dugout to help me out.
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