I'm a very ugly woman...
Lady Xykara

Maitland, FL

#1 Mar 12, 2008
I think if any of you saw me in real life, that you would make fun of me, laugh and taunt and probably most of you would feel sorry for me. I am probably too skinny, I'm slightly two-toned, I have long limbs and long torso like a grey alien, and to make matters worse, I am mixed with so much stuff, that I took all the absolute worst attributes from them all. I took the NAPPY hair from my black side, the beak nose from the Native American side and I took the freckles from my white side.
I'm not quite rawboned and knock-kneed, but I am 5'10 and 134 lbs. I had kinda long hair once upon a time, jet black when relaxed and to my shoulder blades. But I cut my hair after I had my baby girl because it was shedding. I went natural. My teeny weeny afro was complementary to my oval face and alien features...but I decided to let it keep growing and stop trimming it since fall of last year. So, now I have 8 inches of nice healthy growth all around that would look so nice if I had a different grade of hair, but oh noes. It looks nice enough that I do get a lot of compliments on it. But tie a scarf on those nap or lay down for a spell, and what do we have? A smashed head of hair that looks like a brillo pad gone wrong.
I also hate the fact that I don't have that sculpted looking face and neck like other women you see on TV and some in real life. I am not overweight at all, but I don't have those creased, contoured face lines that chicks have. My face is very symmetrical, ironically; in a vulcan, mathematical, very to the point way. There is nothing extravagant about me. As long as I tweeze my brows (which are also fucked up, and help make me ugly because they give absolutely no definition to my face because they are so without dramatic arch) I can pass for a plain Jane and not a human/space alien/ape woman hybrid chimera.
My hair makes me very ugly. In fact, I look better with my head covered because a swath of well-wrapped cloth tends to play up my only thing I have going for me, a plain symmetrical face. I wish I could be a Muslim woman, because I would live in that hijab. I probably would convert just for that reason if I didn't disagree with so many of it's core tenents and beliefs...but anyway.
My body is well enough to pass for my husband, I guess. But I have stretch marks from hell from both my kids and it looks even more horrible on a thin woman than a larger woman because the marks have lesser room to expand and blend. So there is a part of my belly that appears to have lost luster and tone. I never had enough "booty" for black men to notice I existed on planet Earth, so I had to marry a white man. One of the only 4 men who ever gave me the time of day. I was mocked, ridiculed and picked on all throughout high school. I never had a boyfriend or sex until I had my first love at 19. I am as a result, an introvert, a recluse, anti-mainstream and very to myself and spiritual, but I have no religion.
I am not looking for your pity. I know I am ugly and I don't need platitudes. I just wanted to get that off my chest because I saw a person today who could pass for my sister, as we shared similar facial featues. But she looked wayyyy better than me. She filled out her body, some may argue she is fat, but she carries it well and it makes her cuter. She has those exotic iced tea coloured eyes that all men go crazy over. She dares to relax her hair and it looks good. I refuse to relax again, so that's just a "what if" pipe dream fantsay for me to imagine on myself. She does the whole "nails and toes" deal, that I never could get into, as I am very private and prefer to groom myself. We shared the same buttermilk complexion, but hers was evened out by a foundation that I am sure costs 60 ounces of platinium to obtain, and is only available on Jupiter, and she copped the last supply of it last week. Who knows? Maybe she didn't even have on foundation. Maybe she really looks that perfect.

“since every1 ignoring me”

Since: Feb 08

I AM GONE!!! BYE TOPIX!!!

#2 Mar 12, 2008
Lady Xykara wrote:
I think if any of you saw me in real life, that you would make fun of me, laugh and taunt and probably most of you would feel sorry for me. I am probably too skinny, I'm slightly two-toned, I have long limbs and long torso like a grey alien, and to make matters worse, I am mixed with so much stuff, that I took all the absolute worst attributes from them all. I took the NAPPY hair from my black side, the beak nose from the Native American side and I took the freckles from my white side.
I'm not quite rawboned and knock-kneed, but I am 5'10 and 134 lbs. I had kinda long hair once upon a time, jet black when relaxed and to my shoulder blades.
I am not sure if you are serious or not but..........
First of all, Native Americans are FAR from ugly; I cant stop staring at their sculptures faces, especially because I see them every once & a while. I say that first because alot of their blood/heritage runs their my family-but we are black. Some of our hair is "kinky" but mine is not.
I bet you are not even ugly; what is ugly.....is your lack of a good self-esteem.
What I do wish, is that more women would learn to work with what they were born with. I bet your sister looks just like you, the only difference is that she WORKED with what she has.
NO ONE is the prettiest thing on earth; and the uglies dont take the time to focus, meditate & realize beauty lie deep within. So when will you let it out, is the real question?
Okay

Dallas, TX

#3 Mar 12, 2008
If you're married...who the hell cares how you look. Stretch marks? Please. In exchange you have the blessing of God in the form of your children. I'm almost certain you have dysmorphic disorder. Plus, this den of mediocrity is the LAST place I would vent anything that personal. That's what you have a husband for.

“Beau jour mon ami”

Since: Mar 08

IN DA METRO

#4 Mar 12, 2008
My heart goes out to you. Hopefully, one day you will be able to live the life you deserve. Please try to do whatever you can to take your mind off of the pain.
Lady Xykara

Maitland, FL

#5 Mar 12, 2008
CocoCabana aka Wifey wrote:
<quoted text>I am not sure if you are serious or not but..........
First of all, Native Americans are FAR from ugly; I cant stop staring at their sculptures faces, especially because I see them every once & a while. I say that first because alot of their blood/heritage runs their my family-but we are black. Some of our hair is "kinky" but mine is not.
Nah. I'm dead serious. I highly doubt many people would go into such detail weaving a BS story. This is all real. I apologize if my sarcasm and bite born out of the humor of my predicament made any of it sound like a joke.

spikewebbe

Since: Oct 07

Boston, MA

#6 Mar 12, 2008
Don't be so hard on yourself; I've seen you and you're not that bad. I've seen worse.
Lady Xykara

Maitland, FL

#7 Mar 12, 2008
spikewebbe wrote:
Don't be so hard on yourself; I've seen you and you're not that bad. I've seen worse.
O'rly? Where have you seen me at??????
missthang

San Jose, CA

#8 Apr 8, 2008
there is beauty in everyone. this post made me so sad.
Tattle Tail

United States

#9 Apr 8, 2008
You sound beautiful to me. Rare beauty.

“angel”

Since: Dec 06

Location hidden

#10 Apr 8, 2008
Lady Xykara wrote:
I think if any of you saw me in real life, that you would make fun of me, laugh and taunt and probably most of you would feel sorry for me.
This post was funny to me. True, we dont know what you look like, but your soul is beautiful. You captured me. I wish we could go shopping or something,(lol) you deserve to have some fun :) and feel good about yourself!
Tattle Tail

United States

#12 Apr 8, 2008
BOSSY wrote:
<quoted text>This post was funny to me. True, we dont know what you look like, but your soul is beautiful. You captured me. I wish we could go shopping or something,(lol) you deserve to have some fun :) and feel good about yourself!
I know!!! I'll bet her husband thinks she's just perfect.

Since: Dec 07

Stockton, CA

#13 Apr 8, 2008
No one is perfect. I am no perfect at all but I don't let my flaws stop me from being the best me that I can be.

You don't sound bad besides being 5"10 and 134lbs I think you could stand to gain 10-15 lbs.

Alo just because YOU or someone else calls you ugly doesn't mean you are. Beauty IS in the eye of the beholder. I know that's a cliche saying but it's a true one.

“"Living life"”

Since: Oct 07

((Material Status))

#14 Apr 8, 2008
Um really lady you need help!!!!!!!!!! If you believe you are ugly then I'm sure everyone else will also think so.

“since every1 ignoring me”

Since: Feb 08

I AM GONE!!! BYE TOPIX!!!

#15 Apr 8, 2008
Lady Xykara wrote:
<quoted text>
Nah. I'm dead serious. I highly doubt many people would go into such detail weaving a BS story. This is all real. I apologize if my sarcasm and bite born out of the humor of my predicament made any of it sound like a joke.
Lol.
Just remember, at lease you are not a conceited b!tch; I think that is the ugliest trait any woman could have.
Its alot different from being confident. Just find that certain something about you; that makes you feel beautiful.
Stop beating yourself up for goodness-sake!!!
white boi

Columbus, OH

#16 May 21, 2008
hell yea.. i mean come on u even think that dat ur ugly.. what i'ma surpose to think.. u a ugly trick ever heard of 1 800 get cute.. hit that number up
theendisnear

Saint Louis, MO

#17 May 11, 2010
Lady, you sound fine to me. I have the same hair issue as you and I am really annoyed with my hair. If i pick it out it becomes this huge ass afro and I hate it because people stare and laugh. So I hide it under wigs and weaves. I just can't take the verbal assault from people anymore. Hell I wish I did look like an alien because I would look way better than I do now. I bet you look great. You better be glad you don't look like my ugly ass. I have a nose that has a bulb on the end of it. I am short with large breasts a short torso and a flat ass. I have brown skin with all these tiny ass dots all over and then i have enlarged pores and hyperpigmentation all over the sides of my face. Plus my gums are black and my teeth are all spaced out. This is not a joke either. This is what I deal with on a daily basis. Hell I wish I looked like rihanna or megan good. instead i look like some ugly ass slave girl who has messed up hair, messed up face, and a messed up body. Yeah. So again you look fine. I bet you aren't even ugly at all. At least you are married. I heard ugly people don't get married or even date, which is why i am single.
Humpty Dumpty

Seminole, FL

#18 May 11, 2010
Lady Xykara wrote:
I also hate the fact that I don't have that sculpted looking face and neck like other women you see on TV and some in real life. I am not overweight at all, but I don't have those creased, contoured face lines that chicks have. My face is very symmetrical, ironically; in a vulcan, mathematical, very to the point way. There is nothing extravagant about me. As long as I tweeze my brows (which are also fucked up, and help make me ugly because they give absolutely no definition to my face because they are so without dramatic arch) I can pass for a plain Jane and not a human/space alien/ape woman hybrid chimera.
My hair makes me very ugly. In fact, I look better with my head covered because a swath of well-wrapped cloth tends to play up my only thing I have going for me, a plain symmetrical face. I wish I could be a Muslim woman, because I would live in that hijab. I probably would convert just for that reason if I didn't disagree with so many of it's core tenents and beliefs...but anyway.
My body is well enough to pass for my husband, I guess. But I have stretch marks from hell from both my kids and it looks even more horrible on a thin woman than a larger woman because the marks have lesser room to expand and blend. So there is a part of my belly that appears to have lost luster and tone. I never had enough "booty" for black men to notice I existed on planet Earth, so I had to marry a white man. One of the only 4 men who ever gave me the time of day. I was mocked, ridiculed and picked on all throughout high school. I never had a boyfriend or sex until I had my first love at 19. I am as a result, an introvert, a recluse, anti-mainstream and very to myself and spiritual, but I have no religion.
I am not looking for your pity. I know I am ugly and I don't need platitudes. I just wanted to get that off my chest because I saw a person today who could pass for my sister, as we shared similar facial featues. But she looked wayyyy better than me. She filled out her body, some may argue she is fat, but she carries it well and it makes her cuter. She has those exotic iced tea coloured eyes that all men go crazy over. She dares to relax her hair and it looks good. I refuse to relax again, so that's just a "what if" pipe dream fantsay for me to imagine on myself. She does the whole "nails and toes" deal, that I never could get into, as I am very private and prefer to groom myself. We shared the same buttermilk complexion, but hers was evened out by a foundation that I am sure costs 60 ounces of platinium to obtain, and is only available on Jupiter, and she copped the last supply of it last week. Who knows? Maybe she didn't even have on foundation. Maybe she really looks that perfect.
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Spikewebbe

AOL

#20 May 11, 2010
im a ugly pecker slurpin slob!
denzel

Columbus, GA

#22 Jul 4, 2010
ever thought about seeing the wizard?

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