What does it mean to you, to be a goo...

What does it mean to you, to be a good parent?

Posted in the African-American Forum

David

Panama City, FL

#1 Jun 7, 2007
I will soon be a parent again and ask this question to those who have constructive idea's on this subject.
Yuhguy

Minneapolis, MN

#2 Jun 7, 2007
Is it true that:
If a woman tells (most don't) that she has slept with x guys in her lifetime, it is reasonable to assume the true number is 10x.
If a guy says that they have slept with y women so far in their lifetime, the true number is y/10.

“Ra'Saan Kadafi Kanati”

Since: Mar 07

CHICAGO,IL

#3 Jun 7, 2007
David wrote:
I will soon be a parent again and ask this question to those who have constructive idea's on this subject.
First off Congratulations on your expectancy.What makes a good parent is not being dead beat and lazy!!.Teach,show,direct,disci pline,talk,explain,never keep anything from your kids stay real with them about EVERYTHING!!!SPEND:time & money!!basically have fun raising your kids.If it's not in death never leave them!! your duty as a parent is to guide them.Recollect some of your experiences you had growing up and share it with them as learning lessons so that when they cross paths with certain times in life they can use them as references!!LOVE your kids!!!,.. like you love yourself!!!
David

Panama City, FL

#4 Jun 7, 2007
Kadafi Kanati wrote:
<quoted text>First off Congratulations on your expectancy.What makes a good parent is not being dead beat and lazy!!.Teach,show,direct,disci pline,talk,explain,never keep anything from your kids stay real with them about EVERYTHING!!!SPEND:time & money!!basically have fun raising your kids.If it's not in death never leave them!! your duty as a parent is to guide them.Recollect some of your experiences you had growing up and share it with them as learning lessons so that when they cross paths with certain times in life they can use them as references!!LOVE your kids!!!,.. like you love yourself!!!
I will definitely do my best to take all of your advice on this subject. I thank you for your kind comments and wish you all good that life can offer.
crystalglass

United States

#5 Jun 7, 2007
I'm going to get us back on the original subject. What does it mean to you, to be a good parent?

Parenting is one of the hardest jobs I've ever had to do. Speaking with my own parents, they feel it wasn't as hard to raise kids when I was a kid as it is now.

For me parenting is a lot of self-sacrificing for the greater good. When I first became a parent, I really didn't know that so much was expected of me. It has turned out to be a lot of hard work and I try to give it my all. Being an African American mom, having an African American child, while living in the U.S., there is so much more to do. So much more to teach. So much more to make our children aware of.

We can't leave the education of our AA children up to the schools, we have to upgrade the diet from what was given to many of us when we were children (and to some this can become pretty expensive if done correctly), we have to teach our AA children basic knowledge of the laws and the way laws are set up (which requires a few trips to the Law Library), and so much more.

When you make the decision to become a parent, you really have to be a parent and you can't whine about the midnight feedings, helping with homework, volunteering at their schools, teaching proper values, spending time at play, and listening all of the time.

All of these things I mentioned, you have to set the example, because our children are watching us.

Parenting is a lot of hard work, if you want to do it right!

“Dreams are the touchstones of ”

Since: Feb 07

Our characters

#6 Jun 7, 2007
Being a good parent to me is always loving my child and putting her needs before my own or anyone else's and to always be there for her(my daughter). To never be selfish and give her a hug and tell her how much I love her every chance I get. Congrats to you!

“Ra'Saan Kadafi Kanati”

Since: Mar 07

CHICAGO,IL

#7 Jun 7, 2007
David wrote:
<quoted text>
I will definitely do my best to take all of your advice on this subject. I thank you for your kind comments and wish you all good that life can offer.
Thank you.
David

Panama City, FL

#8 Jun 7, 2007
crystalglass wrote:
I'm going to get us back on the original subject. What does it mean to you, to be a good parent?
Parenting is one of the hardest jobs I've ever had to do. Speaking with my own parents, they feel it wasn't as hard to raise kids when I was a kid as it is now.
For me parenting is a lot of self-sacrificing for the greater good. When I first became a parent, I really didn't know that so much was expected of me. It has turned out to be a lot of hard work and I try to give it my all. Being an African American mom, having an African American child, while living in the U.S., there is so much more to do. So much more to teach. So much more to make our children aware of.
We can't leave the education of our AA children up to the schools, we have to upgrade the diet from what was given to many of us when we were children (and to some this can become pretty expensive if done correctly), we have to teach our AA children basic knowledge of the laws and the way laws are set up (which requires a few trips to the Law Library), and so much more.
When you make the decision to become a parent, you really have to be a parent and you can't whine about the midnight feedings, helping with homework, volunteering at their schools, teaching proper values, spending time at play, and listening all of the time.
All of these things I mentioned, you have to set the example, because our children are watching us.
Parenting is a lot of hard work, if you want to do it right!
Thank you so much for your insightful comments.
crystalglass

United States

#9 Jun 7, 2007
Thank you for starting such a positive forum.
David wrote:
<quoted text>
Thank you so much for your insightful comments.

Level 1

Since: Jun 07

Location hidden

#10 Jun 8, 2007
crystalglass wrote:
I'm going to get us back on the original subject. What does it mean to you, to be a good parent?
Parenting is one of the hardest jobs I've ever had to do. Speaking with my own parents, they feel it wasn't as hard to raise kids when I was a kid as it is now.
For me parenting is a lot of self-sacrificing for the greater good. When I first became a parent, I really didn't know that so much was expected of me. It has turned out to be a lot of hard work and I try to give it my all. Being an African American mom, having an African American child, while living in the U.S., there is so much more to do. So much more to teach. So much more to make our children aware of.
We can't leave the education of our AA children up to the schools, we have to upgrade the diet from what was given to many of us when we were children (and to some this can become pretty expensive if done correctly), we have to teach our AA children basic knowledge of the laws and the way laws are set up (which requires a few trips to the Law Library), and so much more.
When you make the decision to become a parent, you really have to be a parent and you can't whine about the midnight feedings, helping with homework, volunteering at their schools, teaching proper values, spending time at play, and listening all of the time.
All of these things I mentioned, you have to set the example, because our children are watching us.
Parenting is a lot of hard work, if you want to do it right!
Thank you for redirecting the discussion to the original subject. I agree that being a parent often times came be very challenging. To me, a good parent (from a biological aspect) is a mother or father who meets the needs of her/his child on a daily basis. Those needs can be physical, social, emotional, cognitive, or spiritual (for those of faith).

Abraham Maslow's theory depicted that human needs would be met in a certain order, in which he described as Hierarchy of Needs.

Personally, I take great pride in my role as a father and will not relinquish it for any reason. I believe that my most paramount responsibilities to my children are to protect, to provide, and to prepare them for adulthood. I often remind them that I have the first 18 years of their lives to do my parental duties. Then they have the rest of their lives to demonstrate to me how well I fulfilled my responsibilities as a father.

I honestly believe parents can give themselves a letter grade (whether it be an A or an F) based on their expectations for the children if the expectations are truly consistent with the example that they have set for the children. When this happens, the parent can consider himself/herself to be a good parent.

In my humble opinion, this is a really deep question. I commend the author for putting it on out on a thread for discussion. Again, I thank you for informing me that this thread was out there.
crystalglass

San Diego, CA

#11 Jun 9, 2007
Hi Gundee123:

I glad you could make it over here. Yeaaaaaa!!!

Before I became a mother, I read in a magazine an article titled "Roots and Wings." The article stated that this is an old Chinese Proverb which means:

We lay the root foundation for our children by teaching them what they need to know in order to become a happy and healthy adult. When they become old enough to leave us and go out on their own, we give them their wings to fly and hope what we instilled in them, gives them the knowledged to live their lives wisely.

I read this article back in the 90s. I guess some things in our lives we will hold forever.
gundee123 wrote:
<quoted text>
Thank you for redirecting the discussion to the original subject. I agree that being a parent often times came be very challenging. To me, a good parent (from a biological aspect) is a mother or father who meets the needs of her/his child on a daily basis. Those needs can be physical, social, emotional, cognitive, or spiritual (for those of faith).
Abraham Maslow's theory depicted that human needs would be met in a certain order, in which he described as Hierarchy of Needs.
Personally, I take great pride in my role as a father and will not relinquish it for any reason. I believe that my most paramount responsibilities to my children are to protect, to provide, and to prepare them for adulthood. I often remind them that I have the first 18 years of their lives to do my parental duties. Then they have the rest of their lives to demonstrate to me how well I fulfilled my responsibilities as a father.
I honestly believe parents can give themselves a letter grade (whether it be an A or an F) based on their expectations for the children if the expectations are truly consistent with the example that they have set for the children. When this happens, the parent can consider himself/herself to be a good parent.
In my humble opinion, this is a really deep question. I commend the author for putting it on out on a thread for discussion. Again, I thank you for informing me that this thread was out there.
crystalglass

San Diego, CA

#12 Jun 10, 2007
Another thing Black people need to do seriously is protect our children. This is a very disturbing story and since I use to be in the Navy, I know the mother did not have to leave her children. One of the parents was already in Iraq and the military as a rule, does not leave children deserted. Unless the rules have changed.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/18884363/

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