DATE SCENE FOR Conscience BLACK PEOPLE

DATE SCENE FOR Conscience BLACK PEOPLE

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Since: May 09

NYC

#1 May 23, 2009
How is it? Many of us mention stability, players etc. Well, what is your experience if you're Conscience, Pro Black etc.? Do you have a rough time finding the "one"? You can be Black and conscience and be a professional. It does not signify dreads, dashikis and a balled up fist. Many of us get into relationships and NEVER talk about the issues facing us. We just turn on Go and it leads right into a brick wall.

We are not them. We are different. How do you know where your mates head is at. A brotha told me he was with a fine sista for a year and one day asked her" what doi you think can help our community?" and she had nothing to say. He left her. Don't you wanna know wherer your mates head is at before dating wining and dining.
Many of us would rather have a date that never questions a thing. Just go along and shop, go out and have a superficial, shallow Black relationship.

Do you find Conscience Black people the minority? Just share your thoughts.

Thanks

Since: May 09

NYC

#2 May 23, 2009
Is the bm or bw you date sleeping behind the wheel? Come on yall. Lets hear it.

Since: May 09

NYC

#3 May 23, 2009
I will bump the hell out of this 1000 times yall.

Mack the Great

Since: May 07

Fort Washington, MD

#4 May 23, 2009
Interesting topic bro. It's rare to find a good brotha or sista or conscious brotha and sista for that matter that cares about the black community. I tried to discuss black issues with a few sistas at my job but they were giving me answers I didn't want to hear and strawmanning my arguments.That, and they don't seem to be the kinds of women that care about the issues in the black community and that's a deal breaker and turn off to me; not being able to talk about black issues in our community.

“A diamond in the rough...”

Since: Dec 08

Location hidden

#5 May 23, 2009
Slim pickings...I haven't actually dated in a while,for personal reasons,but "conscience" black people in general are minimal. Even the people you would expect to be "conscience"such as black professionals,educated,or the educated professionals who came from poorer backgrounds,etc...
I mean, I can bring up a certain issue dealing with the black community with my closest family or associates and they either say nothing or something oblivious or like many blacks,pretend its not an issue.

“R U Still Down?”

Level 1

Since: Feb 09

Boynton Beach, FL

#6 May 23, 2009
an enlightened black woman is the best there is

Since: May 09

NYC

#7 May 23, 2009
Mack the Great wrote:
Interesting topic bro. It's rare to find a good brotha or sista or conscious brotha and sista for that matter that cares about the black community. I tried to discuss black issues with a few sistas at my job but they were giving me answers I didn't want to hear and strawmanning my arguments.That, and they don't seem to be the kinds of women that care about the issues in the black community and that's a deal breaker and turn off to me; not being able to talk about black issues in our community.
I'm telling you! Many sistas just turn me off when they turn out to be hallow heads. Esp the pretty ones. They bought the white mans lies about being too good to be into their culture or too good for Black men. Show me a fine sista and normally she is not conscious. A DEAL BREAKER!
Notice that every complaint about BM they NEVER mention the root of all Black peoples problems. "IS HE CONSCIOUS?" And when you are they find it threatening. They want a Black/white man. They don't want you to be honest. When you are honest about your thoughts they can't take it. They want you to kiss a$$ and be like the other brothas. Just sweat me. Just because you're Black does not mean i gotta go along with that sleep state. It's the brothas fault to. They just tag along to get some. Naw man, Find out what's up with her or him.

Since: May 09

NYC

#8 May 23, 2009
LilBlackGirl wrote:
Slim pickings...I haven't actually dated in a while,for personal reasons,but "conscience" black people in general are minimal. Even the people you would expect to be "conscience"such as black professionals,educated,or the educated professionals who came from poorer backgrounds,etc...
I mean, I can bring up a certain issue dealing with the black community with my closest family or associates and they either say nothing or something oblivious or like many blacks,pretend its not an issue.
Very true. I normally don't carry my thoughts beliefs on my sleeve but if i'm attracted to a BW i through feelers out there to see where she's at. If it;s a dud i normally lose interest. We are not going anywhere unless we deal with issues. I'm fortunate to have found a sista who has deep discussions about many things and issues. Of course we go out and dance watch cheesy movies and joke around too.

Before her i met loads of Chicken heads, professional and nonprofessional. Very stuck up, low tolerance for brothas that have a way of thinking that is outside the norm. BM and BW are normally not into intellect. I rarely see Black couples sitting in starbucks reading together or discussing something serious.

Since: May 09

NYC

#9 May 23, 2009
Brand Nubian88 wrote:
an enlightened black woman is the best there is
You got that right.

Mack the Great

Since: May 07

Fort Washington, MD

#10 May 23, 2009
TecHouse wrote:
<quoted text>
I'm telling you! Many sistas just turn me off when they turn out to be hallow heads. Esp the pretty ones. They bought the white mans lies about being too good to be into their culture or too good for Black men. Show me a fine sista and normally she is not conscious. A DEAL BREAKER!
Notice that every complaint about BM they NEVER mention the root of all Black peoples problems. "IS HE CONSCIOUS?" And when you are they find it threatening. They want a Black/white man. They don't want you to be honest. When you are honest about your thoughts they can't take it. They want you to kiss a$$ and be like the other brothas. Just sweat me. Just because you're Black does not mean i gotta go along with that sleep state. It's the brothas fault to. They just tag along to get some. Naw man, Find out what's up with her or him.
I agree.It's that or they must somehow see conscious brothas as boring and too mature minded for their tastes.That, and since these women you are dealing with are the stereotypical black women that are responsible for most of the problems in the black community.I'm not gonna hop on the band wagon of being interested in sistas for their good looks and live the life of a rapper while continue to be ignorant.
LMAO

AOL

#11 May 23, 2009
Mack the Great wrote:
<quoted text>
I agree.It's that or they must somehow see conscious brothas as boring and too mature minded for their tastes.That, and since these women you are dealing with are the stereotypical black women that are responsible for most of the problems in the black community.I'm not gonna hop on the band wagon of being interested in sistas for their good looks and live the life of a rapper while continue to be ignorant.
Brother?

Brother you aint no real brother.


You way too light not to be part white.

Barracks kids are darker than you and we know they part white.

LMAOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Since: May 09

NYC

#12 May 24, 2009
Mack the Great wrote:
<quoted text>
I agree.It's that or they must somehow see conscious brothas as boring and too mature minded for their tastes.That, and since these women you are dealing with are the stereotypical black women that are responsible for most of the problems in the black community.I'm not gonna hop on the band wagon of being interested in sistas for their good looks and live the life of a rapper while continue to be ignorant.
C/S! I'm not at all interested in those kinds of Blk woman. They are the types that end up with mad kids burnt out bitter and single.

Mack the Great

Since: May 07

Fort Washington, MD

#13 May 24, 2009
TecHouse wrote:
<quoted text>
C/S! I'm not at all interested in those kinds of Blk woman. They are the types that end up with mad kids burnt out bitter and single.
LOL True.I wish there were more sistas out there that are conscious and full of substance rather than ghetto hoochies with no style, substance or character.

Since: May 09

NYC

#14 May 25, 2009
Mack the Great wrote:
<quoted text>
LOL True.I wish there were more sistas out there that are conscious and full of substance rather than ghetto hoochies with no style, substance or character.
I know man. In other cultures you find that most of the woman have Culture, grace, and substance. In our Culture it's so rare. By the time you find her you had to stick your hand in alot of s%^T just to get it. That's why i normally go downtown to socialize because when i go around our people you have to dumb down or act like you're borderline ignorant. I cannot understand why we still want to be like that.I guess whites don't have to keep us in place any more. Sisters won't date you unless you play the N&^er role.
We swallowed the idea that refinement, substance and character is for Whites only.
Kenyatta

Woodbridge, VA

#15 Jun 20, 2013
I know this thread is probably closed. I am dealing with this exact issue now and have for a number of years. Which lead me to find this thread. I am so eager to have a real conversation with a conscious brother. Eager may be an understatement. I am starving and at times the only way to describe it is my need for water. I currently live in Va. I dont think I will have any luck here. Can someone give advice on what steps I should begin to take. This community is not very large and nearly non existent where I live.

“ News”

Level 6

Since: Aug 11

Location hidden

#16 Jun 20, 2013
TecHouse wrote:
<quoted text>
I'm telling you! Many sistas just turn me off when they turn out to be hallow heads. Esp the pretty ones. They bought the white mans lies about being too good to be into their culture or too good for Black men. Show me a fine sista and normally she is not conscious. A DEAL BREAKER!
Notice that every complaint about BM they NEVER mention the root of all Black peoples problems. "IS HE CONSCIOUS?" And when you are they find it threatening. They want a Black/white man. They don't want you to be honest. When you are honest about your thoughts they can't take it. They want you to kiss a$$ and be like the other brothas. Just sweat me. Just because you're Black does not mean i gotta go along with that sleep state. It's the brothas fault to. They just tag along to get some. Naw man, Find out what's up with her or him.
What you said in this post seems to hold a lot of truth. It does seem like a lot of black women take forever to let you know how conscious they are of the black community. The ones who find that Black/white man they were looking for, tend to get disappointed when they find out he wants a white women, or he wants a black woman above her class. It's almost like a endless cycle.

A lot of time when I first start dating a sister, discussing black issues sometimes feel like I'm opening some pandora box or something, and it shouldn't feel that way, and it's usually with the fine sisters. It often feels like I'm playing a game of cards, where I'm showing my hand first, but they won't show theirs. It would be months before you find out if she grew up with the poor, middle, or upper class of blacks. Although a lot of them put on this front, I find most of them come from the poor to middle class blacks, just like most black people. So what's the big deal? I used to think they were ashamed of telling me if they ever lived around poor blacks, and sometimes that may the the case. But I'm starting to find it more true that they just want to have an upperhand, since I already told them the blacks I grew up around, who weren't exactly upper class by the way.

I thinks it's important to know the kind of blacks my date grew up around, so when I do speak on black issues, I won't sound like I'm offending her. For all I know, she could be from the projects. But, it shouldn't be a taboo discussing anything that blacks can relate to. I came up in an era when almost all blacks were either born in the projects, or in a poor part of the south.

I may have went of base a little here, but it seems like to a lot of sisters, if you start showing that your a conscious brother, they almost look at you like your practically still in the hood, and you will never succeed in the white mans world. And by them not being very conscious on black issues, some how puts them on a higher level. I may be wrong, but it sure seems that way sometimes. I guess instead of conscious black men worrying about turning them off, perhaps they should be more concerned whether they are being turned off.
Rahsaan

Newport News, VA

#17 Jun 21, 2014
Kenyatta wrote:
I know this thread is probably closed. I am dealing with this exact issue now and have for a number of years. Which lead me to find this thread. I am so eager to have a real conversation with a conscious brother. Eager may be an understatement. I am starving and at times the only way to describe it is my need for water. I currently live in Va. I dont think I will have any luck here. Can someone give advice on what steps I should begin to take. This community is not very large and nearly non existent where I live.
I wish I had been here over a year earlier I would help big time, I overstand.
Cha

United States

#18 Jun 21, 2014
TecHouse wrote:
How is it? Many of us mention stability, players etc. Well, what is your experience if you're Conscience, Pro Black etc.? Do you have a rough time finding the "one"? You can be Black and conscience and be a professional. It does not signify dreads, dashikis and a balled up fist. Many of us get into relationships and NEVER talk about the issues facing us. We just turn on Go and it leads right into a brick wall.
We are not them. We are different. How do you know where your mates head is at. A brotha told me he was with a fine sista for a year and one day asked her" what doi you think can help our community?" and she had nothing to say. He left her. Don't you wanna know wherer your mates head is at before dating wining and dining.
Many of us would rather have a date that never questions a thing. Just go along and shop, go out and have a superficial, shallow Black relationship.
Do you find Conscience Black people the minority? Just share your thoughts.
Thanks
Sista's / blackwomen, be careful DON'T fall nor flip or go 'head over heels' for this. Compare to ALL women YOU have to be MORE careful and ALERT more so than other women.
Sista's STAY focus and DO NOT become to trusting towards EVERYONE nor in reference to EVERYTHING you hear.

“ News”

Level 6

Since: Aug 11

Location hidden

#19 Jun 21, 2014
KPITRL wrote:
<quoted text>
What you said in this post seems to hold a lot of truth. It does seem like a lot of black women take forever to let you know how conscious they are of the black community. The ones who find that Black/white man they were looking for, tend to get disappointed when they find out he wants a white women, or he wants a black woman above her class. It's almost like a endless cycle.
A lot of time when I first start dating a sister, discussing black issues sometimes feel like I'm opening some pandora box or something, and it shouldn't feel that way, and it's usually with the fine sisters. It often feels like I'm playing a game of cards, where I'm showing my hand first, but they won't show theirs. It would be months before you find out if she grew up with the poor, middle, or upper class of blacks. Although a lot of them put on this front, I find most of them come from the poor to middle class blacks, just like most black people. So what's the big deal? I used to think they were ashamed of telling me if they ever lived around poor blacks, and sometimes that may the the case. But I'm starting to find it more true that they just want to have an upperhand, since I already told them the blacks I grew up around, who weren't exactly upper class by the way.
I thinks it's important to know the kind of blacks my date grew up around, so when I do speak on black issues, I won't sound like I'm offending her. For all I know, she could be from the projects. But, it shouldn't be a taboo discussing anything that blacks can relate to. I came up in an era when almost all blacks were either born in the projects, or in a poor part of the south.
I may have went of base a little here, but it seems like to a lot of sisters, if you start showing that your a conscious brother, they almost look at you like your practically still in the hood, and you will never succeed in the white mans world. And by them not being very conscious on black issues, some how puts them on a higher level. I may be wrong, but it sure seems that way sometimes. I guess instead of conscious black men worrying about turning them off, perhaps they should be more concerned whether they are being turned off.
Wow, it's been a few days past a year since I responded with the post above. What I wrote was an issue before, while, and after I wrote that response. However there was something I was holding back in my subconscious, and I just didn't want to say it then. But now, since this love affair many black women have with the show, "Scandal", along with an experience I had not long before I wrote that response, I'm going to just come out and say it, since so many don't mind coming out and saying they like that show, even for the fantasy love affair with the white man.

But it seems that the reason many black woman don't reveal their consciousness of the black community while in a relationship with a conscious brother, is because they don't want it to rub off on them if they break up. This may damage their ability to revert back to go along to get along with the white mans establishment, especially if they wound up with a white man. Some have already been with one, which explains it even more.

I'm sorry, but after having a couple of relationships with the so-called classy Huxtable girl type, along with the ones who had the becky whine, which used to also turn me on as long as they could mix some soul with it, my mind has kinda changed a little after I woke up and realized a lot of them picked up that way from dating a white man or men. This makes me find the Thelma from Good Times type more appealing. I always did like her type, but it seems like her type faded away in the 80's, like most of the other conscious black women. Now it seems like it's either the fake Huxtable girl type, or the low end style of Pam from the Martin show, if not Sha nay nay. Although there are still some out there, it can seem to be flooded with the types I just mentioned.

“ News”

Level 6

Since: Aug 11

Location hidden

#21 Jun 22, 2014
KPITRL wrote:
<quoted text>
Wow, it's been a few days past a year since I responded with the post above. What I wrote was an issue before, while, and after I wrote that response. However there was something I was holding back in my subconscious, and I just didn't want to say it then. But now, since this love affair many black women have with the show, "Scandal", along with an experience I had not long before I wrote that response, I'm going to just come out and say it, since so many don't mind coming out and saying they like that show, even for the fantasy love affair with the white man.
But it seems that the reason many black woman don't reveal their consciousness of the black community while in a relationship with a conscious brother, is because they don't want it to rub off on them if they break up. This may damage their ability to revert back to go along to get along with the white mans establishment, especially if they wound up with a white man. Some have already been with one, which explains it even more.
I'm sorry, but after having a couple of relationships with the so-called classy Huxtable girl type, along with the ones who had the becky whine, which used to also turn me on as long as they could mix some soul with it, my mind has kinda changed a little after I woke up and realized a lot of them picked up that way from dating a white man or men. This makes me find the Thelma from Good Times type more appealing. I always did like her type, but it seems like her type faded away in the 80's, like most of the other conscious black women. Now it seems like it's either the fake Huxtable girl type, or the low end style of Pam from the Martin show, if not Sha nay nay. Although there are still some out there, it can seem to be flooded with the types I just mentioned.
I wanted to add this in the post above, but I ran out of space. Although I still think it's more black women with this, a lot of black men have this similar mentality when it comes to going along to get along, therefore not being too vocal when it comes to the issue of black consciousness. It seems like career black women have started seeking out his type more so, who equates to that black/white man I was speaking about in post #16. Then she gets disappointed when she finds out a white woman already had her spot, or may get her spot. Either that or he feels she's some how beneath him. But down inside, one way or the other, and although she may think she have more security, she knows she doesn't have a real man.

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