Sistas with open dating options

[tommy aka batman]

I wonder when sistas say they have open datin options,or they want to try something new, why does it seem to be just about race?!?

If it's just race for opening your options, you are putting your self in another box,just as if you were just dating black men.

Shouldn't open options also be different formal education level?

What about the job profession? What if he managed burger king,or worked at Macy's,and you are a lawyer?

If you can open yourself to another race, what about a different level of education,or profession?

OUCH!!!!!!!!!!

[jmill82]

tommy aka batman wrote:

I wonder when sistas say they have open datin options,or they want to try something new, why does it seem to be just about race?!?
If it's just race for opening your options, you are putting your self in another box,just as if you were just dating black men.
Shouldn't open options also be different formal education level?
What about the job profession? What if he managed burger king,or worked at Macy's,and you are a lawyer?
If you can open yourself to another race, what about a different level of education,or profession?
OUCH!!!!!!!!!!

Interesting post, I'd like to see what type of responses come back.

[njfashionista]

Well, for myself personally, not everyone I dated was college educated.

But if I work my butt off and have goals for myself, a mate is going to have to have a similar work ethic.

So if he works as a Manager at Burger King..what are his next step? District Manager? Is he taking maybe a couple of hospitality management courses to help him get there? That's ok in my book.

If he's just lazy or unmotivated, that is unattractive.

[Ransgrl]

The man I am marrying has no college degree. I have a PhD. I make almost 3 times his current salary, but he has started a business which hopefully will become successful. I have dated men on my educational "level" and some experiences were better than others. However, my fiance and I share the same core values even though we don't share "status" and I have no qualms about inviting him to my professional functions which require him to interact with my colleagues.

Tommy, why do want to make it seem as if you're reinventing the wheel every time you create a thread? You honestly don't think sisters with college degrees aren't dating blue collar brothers? Oh please! This subject is neither deep nor will it foster introspection into the hearts and minds of the women who need to hear the message.

[tommy]

njfashionista wrote:

Well, for myself personally, not everyone I dated was college educated.
But if I work my butt off and have goals for myself, a mate is going to have to have a similar work ethic.
So if he works as a Manager at Burger King..what are his next step? District Manager? Is he taking maybe a couple of hospitality management courses to help him get there? That's ok in my book.
If he's just lazy or unmotivated, that is unattractive.

typical.

Suppose he is satisfied being a burger king manager,but he is a praying man.

See I knew it. Something new,or being open to date means non black men.

So damn sad.

Open should mean open period. Not just a different race.

[tommy]

Ransgrl wrote:

The man I am marrying has no college degree. I have a PhD. I make almost 3 times his current salary, but he has started a business which hopefully will become successful. I have dated men on my educational "level" and some experiences were better than others. However, my fiance and I share the same core values even though we don't share "status" and I have no qualms about inviting him to my professional functions which require him to interact with my colleagues.
Tommy, why do want to make it seem as if you're reinventing the wheel every time you create a thread? You honestly don't think sisters with college degrees aren't dating blue collar brothers? Oh please! This subject is neither deep nor will it foster introspection into the hearts and minds of the women who need to hear the message.

somebody always on my dyck. Stop hatin.

If this don't apply to you,then it don't apply to you.

[Keek Keek Keek]

Sheapes are disgusting.

[pipinho]

Ransgrl wrote:

I have a PhD.

Pretty much doubt it, whats a person with a PhD doing on Topix?

Stop lying.

[VICVALLIN]

njfashionista wrote:

Well, for myself personally, not everyone I dated was college educated.
But if I work my butt off and have goals for myself, a mate is going to have to have a similar work ethic.
So if he works as a Manager at Burger King..what are his next step? District Manager? Is he taking maybe a couple of hospitality management courses to help him get there? That's ok in my book.
If he's just lazy or unmotivated, that is unattractive.

i sort of disagree with your line of thinking. if someone is comfortable in whatever position they're in and they maintain a comfortable lifestyle where they're not living hand to mouth, i don't see what the problem is. to me, financial status is less important than the way a person lives their life.

[njfashionista]

tommy wrote:

<quoted text>typical.
Suppose he is satisfied being a burger king manager,but he is a praying man.
See I knew it. Something new,or being open to date means non black men.
So damn sad.
Open should mean open period. Not just a different race.

Just because your "open" doesn't mean you don't have standards. Laziness and lack of motivation is not a trait I want in a man. My father wasn't, I'm not, so why would I want a man like that?? It's a clash of values..I was raised to work hard and not settle for just being "average". My parents wouldn't accept a C on my report card.

Like I have said, I've dated black men with and without college degrees. But the ones that didn't were ambitious--working to maintain a stable life.

The Bible teaches us to work hard, and if he were a man of God, he would want to work up to his full potential with the talents God gave him.

"If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever."- 1 Timothy 5:8

You can't provide for a family on 30K a year managing a Burger King.

[njfashionista]

VICVALLIN wrote:

<quoted text>
i sort of disagree with your line of thinking. if someone is comfortable in whatever position they're in and they maintain a comfortable lifestyle where they're not living hand to mouth, i don't see what the problem is. to me, financial status is less important than the way a person lives their life.

Yes, the way a person lives their life is important. But--you can't raise a family on minimum wadge. And if you have a family and can't provide a stable home for them because you are unwilling to and "comfortable", that shows a lack of character on your part.

If you want to stay comfortable at 30K a year, that's fine, but you shouldn't have kids.

[njfashionista]

sorry..."wage" not "wadge"..lol.

[njfashionista]

And before the argument comes up to if I make enough money to support the family...

Nothing in life is guaranteed. God forbid I become disabled or unemployed and it's up to my hubby to support our family. I'm sorry but working as a manager at Burger King is not going to foot the bill for a family of 5...and all because he's comfortable?

No, I need to know that push come to shove, he's got a trade or degree so that he can support the family. Or that he will be willing to work 3 jobs to keep the lights on.

[freeradical]

Ransgrl wrote:

The man I am marrying has no college degree. I have a PhD. I make almost 3 times his current salary, but he has started a business which hopefully will become successful. I have dated men on my educational "level" and some experiences were better than others. However, my fiance and I share the same core values even though we don't share "status" and I have no qualms about inviting him to my professional functions which require him to interact with my colleagues.
Tommy, why do want to make it seem as if you're reinventing the wheel every time you create a thread? You honestly don't think sisters with college degrees aren't dating blue collar brothers? Oh please! This subject is neither deep nor will it foster introspection into the hearts and minds of the women who need to hear the message.

Good for you, too much importance is given to accreditation. A good man/ woman is hard to find.Someone who isnt well off financially can add to the relationship in many other ways.

[Wellwisher]

pipinho wrote:

<quoted text>
Pretty much doubt it, whats a person with a PhD doing on Topix?
Stop lying.

*Dead*

[tommy aka batman]

njfashionista wrote:

<quoted text>
Yes, the way a person lives their life is important. But--you can't raise a family on minimum wadge. And if you have a family and can't provide a stable home for them because you are unwilling to and "comfortable", that shows a lack of character on your part.
If you want to stay comfortable at 30K a year, that's fine, but you shouldn't have kids.

you shouldn't have kids?!? WOW!! So if the man makes 30,000 a year,and the woman makes 30,000 a year, they shouldn't have kids?!?

See people misuse that word lazy. Most Americans aren't in shape. Obesity is at an all time high. Is that laziness?!? Not going to the gym,or not doing cardio?

Suppose your man don't pray a damn lick,or go to church. Is that lazy?!?

Or is it just in terms of job elevation? Is it the only thing that deals with motivation?

[tommy aka batman]

njfashionista wrote:

And before the argument comes up to if I make enough money to support the family...
Nothing in life is guaranteed. God forbid I become disabled or unemployed and it's up to my hubby to support our family. I'm sorry but working as a manager at Burger King is not going to foot the bill for a family of 5...and all because he's comfortable?
No, I need to know that push come to shove, he's got a trade or degree so that he can support the family. Or that he will be willing to work 3 jobs to keep the lights on.

I feel that. But see if the right don't get ya, the left will.
Many American men can provide finacially for the family. Yet for some strange reason they ain't happy.

Where is God in your equation?!? Or is he in there?

So many women put God as the last thing in a mate.

Yall say,"As long as he makes a salary to provide for a family, that's all that matters. Oh,and he is a decent human being".

Like lauren hill says, "the road to hell is paved with good intentions".

[Logical Butterfly]

tommy wrote:

<quoted text>somebody always on my dyck. Stop hatin.
If this don't apply to you,then it don't apply to you.

man, you are prejudice to look so good.

[Ransgrl]

pipinho wrote:

<quoted text>
Pretty much doubt it, whats a person with a PhD doing on Topix?
Stop lying.

Educated people don't have free time? Look at my comment count, it's pretty paltry compared to most posters who have been on Topix for the same amount of time. I run my own business and work only 3 days a week. Don't be jealous. There are plenty of bright and educated people on this forum so try again troll.

[Wellwisher]

Ransgrl wrote:

<quoted text>
Educated people don't have free time? Look at my comment count, it's pretty paltry compared to most posters who have been on Topix for the same amount of time. I run my own business and work only 3 days a week. Don't be jealous. There are plenty of bright and educated people on this forum so try again troll.

I think 'plenty' is a slight reach.....LMAO

What type of business do you run?