Women make it hard for men to approach

Women make it hard for men to approach

Posted in the African-American Forum

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Wise - Son

United States

#1 Mar 8, 2010
What I have found is that men don't approach women because women make it hard....Agree or disagree...Your thoughts....

Level 4

Since: Sep 09

Oured,Osea

#2 Mar 8, 2010
I kinda agree in the sense that women usually don't give clear visuals signs of interest in us men to warrant an approach, or some of them look standoffish and hostile which dissuades some men from wanting to approach. Women make the assumption that we men are supposed to be mind readers and know what they want from us when we really don't know. Since we men are visual creatures, it would greatly help if women threw us some flirtatious signs of interests that we can see, rather than expect for us men to be able to read their minds.

AKJ

“akj”

Level 1

Since: May 08

I love my lil son..:)

#3 Mar 8, 2010
Nerdtician wrote:
I kinda agree in the sense that women usually don't give clear visuals signs of interest in us men to warrant an approach, or some of them look standoffish and hostile which dissuades some men from wanting to approach. Women make the assumption that we men are supposed to be mind readers and know what they want from us when we really don't know. Since we men are visual creatures, it would greatly help if women threw us some flirtatious signs of interests that we can see, rather than expect for us men to be able to read their minds.
Hi Mack!! How have you been? My baby is 6mths. today!

“From the mind of a...”

Since: Jan 10

"STRONG Black sista!"

#4 Mar 8, 2010
As a woman, I definitely agree... I, myself, am guilty of what I am about to describe... Many times we don't smile, we avoid direct eyecontact and have a tendency to have a "prove yourself to me" attitude when a man finally DOES approach us... I think we should be more open and warm so that men can feel comfortable approaching us... Now, I am NOT saying that we need to ACCEPT every advance, but just that we should be more approachable... especially sistas...
REAL_not just in ga

Chicago, IL

#5 Mar 8, 2010
^^only for the good brothas not fo the bad nukkas
Black Women

United States

#6 Mar 8, 2010
That's because were tired of y'all always panting like dogs. Sit boy. Y'all don't get the clue when we're not interested.

Level 4

Since: Sep 09

Oured,Osea

#7 Mar 8, 2010
AKJ wrote:
<quoted text>Hi Mack!! How have you been? My baby is 6mths. today!
LOL Hey there AKJ!((hugs)) I've been good. Glad to hear from you again and your baby is so adorable!:)

“Das raht!”

Level 3

Since: Dec 06

Location hidden

#8 Mar 8, 2010
I disagree. Chivalry is not dead. If you want to talk to me, you have to approach me. Besides, if you are too friendly with everyone, you come off as easy. Some men think the smile that makes me approachable means I want to sleep with you, and they don't leave me alone after that.

Level 2

Since: Jul 07

Jamaica Queens, New York

#9 Mar 8, 2010
You know whats the worst, when a dude you don't want to approach does. You make sure as soon as you see him looking not to make eye contact and he still comes. Sometimes you can see guys looking at you like they are contemplating coming over and don't want them to so I hurry up and look the other way. Not saying I'm too good but i'm involved. To me its easy to get a guy to approach if you want him to with eye contact and a smile.
Jupiter

Austin, TX

#10 Mar 8, 2010
This thread goes in the "Its everybody's fault but the Black man's" pile. Smh.

“I'm just a Routined”

Level 5

Since: Mar 09

Plattsburgh, NY

#11 Mar 8, 2010
I agree, these days it seems like its pretty hard for a man to charm a woman these days...

“Real Black Men Speak English”

Level 4

Since: May 07

Bmore

#12 Mar 8, 2010
Wise - Son wrote:
What I have found is that men don't approach women because women make it hard....Agree or disagree...Your thoughts....
I have no problem approaching women. All women aren't going to be receptive to your advances, grow a pair and go for it
tak

Tempe, AZ

#13 Mar 8, 2010
I just hate when guys feed you cheesy lines. At the mall this guy called me a little piece of heaven, and it made me feel odd. But when a guy makes casual talk with me, about the weather or something stupid, I feel like he's not a jerk that just want to lift my skirt. Treat women like their human first.

Level 6

Since: Jun 08

DC

#14 Mar 8, 2010
BlackPrincesa wrote:
As a woman, I definitely agree... I, myself, am guilty of what I am about to describe... Many times we don't smile, we avoid direct eyecontact and have a tendency to have a "prove yourself to me" attitude when a man finally DOES approach us... I think we should be more open and warm so that men can feel comfortable approaching us... Now, I am NOT saying that we need to ACCEPT every advance, but just that we should be more approachable... especially sistas...
Agred. Women have some how lost that feminine charm that they use to have that MADE a man approach them no matter how resistent or apprehensive he was. Its not like that anymore

Level 6

Since: Jun 08

DC

#15 Mar 8, 2010
R0utin3Ri0t wrote:
I agree, these days it seems like its pretty hard for a man to charm a woman these days...
Agreed...Presentation these days is very important to a woman. Which is fine, but the men with the best presentation..hav eusually had practice. And having practice isn't always a good thing..i.e. playa

I think if more quality men who didn't approach knew that PRESENTATION wasnt as important and less pressure was off him...he would approach more.

Level 6

Since: Jun 08

DC

#16 Mar 8, 2010
Curlylocks wrote:
I disagree. Chivalry is not dead. If you want to talk to me, you have to approach me. Besides, if you are too friendly with everyone, you come off as easy. Some men think the smile that makes me approachable means I want to sleep with you, and they don't leave me alone after that.
You gotta take the good with the bad. You know what..remember, people are always watching you. Did you ever stop to think that a quality brotha see's how you turned down the previous one...and he approaches or doesn't approach you according to how you handled that situation. A smile with get men to approach you, good and bad. But not smiling at all will get fewer men to approach you, and the ones who do approach you...did you ever stop think why would a man who saw me not smiling, still approach me. It's not because you was just SO DAMM FINE..its usually because he thought you was a challenge. And being a challenge isn't a good thing like women believe it is to be. Because a challenge is a GAME to a man. And what happens when he WINS the game.

The best way is to get to know someone as friends mutually. Therefore there is no challenge and no game played. But if you feel like what you've been doing by supposedly playing "HARD TO GET" is working...then please, share your testimony with the fellow ladies

Level 6

Since: Jun 08

DC

#17 Mar 8, 2010
Black Women wrote:
That's because were tired of y'all always panting like dogs. Sit boy. Y'all don't get the clue when we're not interested.
Remember, there is going to come a point in your life where NO MAN will approach you and the compliments about your beauty come fewer and fewer as your age. Yeah, there are some pigs and playas out there so you need to have your guard up SOMEWHAT. But if you have this attitude that men are "drolling over you"...you may ACCIDENTLY push away MR. RIGHT

and MR. RIGHT'S are not around every corner
Venus and Mars

AOL

#18 Mar 8, 2010
This is why women are from Venus and men are from Mars. Men sometimes can't take a hint. If a woman avoids eye contact, and doesn't smile, it's because she's not interested. This is why I don't smile at men who I consider to be strangers because they will swear up and down you want to sleep with them. And OMG, don't pay them a compliment---they will swear that you are soulmates after that. Sometimes I just want to go in the store and get what I want without being bothered. Men always talk about not having respect for women or women not deserving respect. Well, it works both ways. I do not have respect for men who still act like dogs in heat after I tell them I'm in a relationship. If you don't respect my relationship, then how are you going to respect ours if we were to have one?

On top of you men being so visual, use common sense! If a woman turns her head quickly and avoids eye contact, then she wants you to get lost! So therefore, stop coming on topix complaining about women who have attitudes simply because they won't smile at you. It's because they don't want too. So focus your attention on the women who do flirt and smile with you.
BlackWoman

United States

#19 Mar 8, 2010
Swade wrote:
<quoted text>Remember, there is going to come a point in your life where NO MAN will approach you and the compliments about your beauty come fewer and fewer as your age. Yeah, there are some pigs and playas out there so you need to have your guard up SOMEWHAT. But if you have this attitude that men are "drolling over you"...you may ACCIDENTLY push away MR. RIGHT
and MR. RIGHT'S are not around every corner
I understand what your saying it's just some dudes don't get the hint when someone doesn't want to be bothered or uninterested.

Level 6

Since: Jun 08

DC

#20 Mar 8, 2010
Venus and Mars wrote:
This is why women are from Venus and men are from Mars. Men sometimes can't take a hint. If a woman avoids eye contact, and doesn't smile, it's because she's not interested. This is why I don't smile at men who I consider to be strangers because they will swear up and down you want to sleep with them. And OMG, don't pay them a compliment---they will swear that you are soulmates after that. Sometimes I just want to go in the store and get what I want without being bothered. Men always talk about not having respect for women or women not deserving respect. Well, it works both ways. I do not have respect for men who still act like dogs in heat after I tell them I'm in a relationship. If you don't respect my relationship, then how are you going to respect ours if we were to have one?
On top of you men being so visual, use common sense! If a woman turns her head quickly and avoids eye contact, then she wants you to get lost! So therefore, stop coming on topix complaining about women who have attitudes simply because they won't smile at you. It's because they don't want too. So focus your attention on the women who do flirt and smile with you.
SOOOO...if a woman doesnt smile and make eye contact she is not interesting huh.lol

hmm, well that can be true for a confident woman, but what about for a woman who is shy. Keep in mind that woman have a tendency to be more shy then men. So how do women who are shy and don't have men approach them on a daily react?

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