Black men should NOT marry

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Since: Nov 08

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Jul 9, 2009
 

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Too many reasons why brothers don't need to be getting married. First of all, the divorce rate is upwards of 55%. That doesn't include the marriages that are basically over and the partners no longer love each other or want to be together, but they're sticking it out for the children, or they're afraid to be alone or just feel that divorce is against their religion. If it did, the divorce stats would be more like 85%. Basically, marriage is destined to fail. And only a miracle can save your ass when the shid hits the fan.

Because, who are the casualties when divorce strikes? The kids, the man. In that order. As a black man you will have NO rights in divorce court but to stfu and PAY. Pay 'til you can't afford to pay anymore.. and even then the judge will order a bigger payment when she takes your ass back to court saying she needs more money. If you're a father you still have to pay, but if you had just shacked up, you wouldn't have to worry about lawyers and spousal support and all that when you guys break up. Besides, you'd see your kids more often and not have to endure the social stigma of divorce...and you'd still be able to hit that pu$$y whenever the mood strikes unless she takes up with another guy...but what man is going to seriously want a woman with 2, 3 kids?

The government tends to penalize married people more than couples who shack up, so you'd probably derive more benefits as an unmarried couple anyway.

By not getting married you'll probably have less children, so you would be able to better pursue your goals and success in life. You'd have less on your plate and more time to think, create and be happy. You wouldn't see your potential diminished by the burden and demands of children and an ex-wife.

90+ percent of the married brothers are with bw, but you don't have to be married to love your mate and be devoted to her. You could provide some other token of your love and committment. And by not marrying her, you'd save yourself from being pubicly raped when things don't work out. If she doesn't understand where you're coming from when you say you just want to live together, if she insists on getting married, just tell her to "fk off!" then leave. You'd be saving your own life.

“Positive people.”

Since: Jun 08

north little rock arkansas

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#2
Jul 9, 2009
 

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Dentsun4228 wrote:
Too many reasons why brothers don't need to be getting married. First of all, the divorce rate is upwards of 55%. That doesn't include the marriages that are basically over and the partners no longer love each other or want to be together, but they're sticking it out for the children, or they're afraid to be alone or just feel that divorce is against their religion. If it did, the divorce stats would be more like 85%. Basically, marriage is destined to fail. And only a miracle can save your ass when the shid hits the fan.
Because, who are the casualties when divorce strikes? The kids, the man. In that order. As a black man you will have NO rights in divorce court but to stfu and PAY. Pay 'til you can't afford to pay anymore.. and even then the judge will order a bigger payment when she takes your ass back to court saying she needs more money. If you're a father you still have to pay, but if you had just shacked up, you wouldn't have to worry about lawyers and spousal support and all that when you guys break up. Besides, you'd see your kids more often and not have to endure the social stigma of divorce...and you'd still be able to hit that pu$$y whenever the mood strikes unless she takes up with another guy...but what man is going to seriously want a woman with 2, 3 kids?
The government tends to penalize married people more than couples who shack up, so you'd probably derive more benefits as an unmarried couple anyway.
By not getting married you'll probably have less children, so you would be able to better pursue your goals and success in life. You'd have less on your plate and more time to think, create and be happy. You wouldn't see your potential diminished by the burden and demands of children and an ex-wife.
90+ percent of the married brothers are with bw, but you don't have to be married to love your mate and be devoted to her. You could provide some other token of your love and committment. And by not marrying her, you'd save yourself from being pubicly raped when things don't work out. If she doesn't understand where you're coming from when you say you just want to live together, if she insists on getting married, just tell her to "fk off!" then leave. You'd be saving your own life.
Thats the wrong advice to give any group of men,Especially black men.You have a fear of responsibility and commitment.If you want to live a whorish life go head.Leave your poison outside the door.

“It's Good being Me!”

Since: Apr 09

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#4
Jul 9, 2009
 

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This is wrong on so many levels. The reason why the divorice rate is so high isn't b/c men & women shouldn't get married. It's b/c people marry @the wrong time & for the wrong reasons. Marriage is more than a paper. It is the ONLY relationship that you can have w/a person that's MEANT to be life long. Anything else is really unstable. There are benefits to being married. The problem is men get these benefits THEN they don't want to get married. It's not a woman's place (that is not your wife) to be intimate w/you, to be supportive of you, to have your back & to GIVE BIRTH to your children. Marriage is a beautiful & it's way better than playing house. If you love the person you're w/the ultimate action of committment is marriage. PEOPLE STOP LETTING HOODRATZ & THUGS TAINT YOUR IMAGE OF LOVE & MARRIAGE.
Spank Me

United States

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#5
Jul 9, 2009
 

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Dentsun4228 wrote:
Too many reasons why brothers don't need to be getting married. First of all, the divorce rate is upwards of 55%. That doesn't include the marriages that are basically over and the partners no longer love each other or want to be together, but they're sticking it out for the children, or they're afraid to be alone or just feel that divorce is against their religion. If it did, the divorce stats would be more like 85%. Basically, marriage is destined to fail. And only a miracle can save your ass when the shid hits the fan.
Because, who are the casualties when divorce strikes? The kids, the man. In that order. As a black man you will have NO rights in divorce court but to stfu and PAY. Pay 'til you can't afford to pay anymore.. and even then the judge will order a bigger payment when she takes your ass back to court saying she needs more money. If you're a father you still have to pay, but if you had just shacked up, you wouldn't have to worry about lawyers and spousal support and all that when you guys break up. Besides, you'd see your kids more often and not have to endure the social stigma of divorce...and you'd still be able to hit that pu$$y whenever the mood strikes unless she takes up with another guy...but what man is going to seriously want a woman with 2, 3 kids?
The government tends to penalize married people more than couples who shack up, so you'd probably derive more benefits as an unmarried couple anyway.
By not getting married you'll probably have less children, so you would be able to better pursue your goals and success in life. You'd have less on your plate and more time to think, create and be happy. You wouldn't see your potential diminished by the burden and demands of children and an ex-wife.
90+ percent of the married brothers are with bw, but you don't have to be married to love your mate and be devoted to her. You could provide some other token of your love and committment. And by not marrying her, you'd save yourself from being pubicly raped when things don't work out. If she doesn't understand where you're coming from when you say you just want to live together, if she insists on getting married, just tell her to "fk off!" then leave. You'd be saving your own life.
To each his own.

If you don't want to get married then that's just you.

Men think about marriage just as much a woman do.

Marriage is a natural desire.

Life's to short to waste it alone.

I'm sure before america existed marriages lasted much longer. So what is it that american society is doing wrong, or do we allow society and statistics rule our lives.

There are too many men out there that does not want to live their life being lonely or not committed to one woman, through marriage.

“"Go Hard or Go Home"”

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Since: Sep 08

Chicago

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#6
Jul 9, 2009
 

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Lets not get married and lets continue to have little bastards running around

“Certified Drug Dealer (PharmD)”

Since: May 09

Somalinimo

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#7
Jul 9, 2009
 

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Dentsun, you are one dumb azz! Marriage is not about money dummy. Nor is it only about YOU and what you want. It is a relationship based on love, respect, family, devotion. The only reason why you are saying this crap is because you don't want any responsibilities. You are toxic! And have shown to be a dummy once again!

But then why am I not surprised? You are trying to cause more destruction for the Black community with your ideas. If you want to live a life full of sexual gratification with no responsibilities, leave others out of it. Now, Roger, run along. To think you were the same fool that was courting HOA African women with your toxic, self-destructive, self, makes me sick. But then again, you have been proven to be a White guy so who cares. And it all makes sense when you think about it.
Southern Sugar

Hollywood, FL

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#8
Jul 9, 2009
 
Wow...what you're describing is something that is not only happening in the black community, but all over. I live in one of the most diverse areas in the US and have friends from so many different cultures who has told me that the same thing happens in their community as well. So, I would say to you that perhaps you should look beyond the black community for what you describe as a "problem" and see the overall picture.

It is obvious that you have been hurt and disallusioned. That's what happens in life when things don't go as expected. However, the mature thing to do would be accept the good and bad, learn from it and press on. Also, perhaps you need to take a look at what was your role and responsibility in your life choices that led to the events that have you so bitter and confused.

If you feel that marriage is not for you, then so be it. You need to heal so that you can move forward with your life. But to try to poison others because you're not able to or don't want to deal is not right.

“you are”

Since: Dec 06

United States

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#9
Jul 9, 2009
 

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This is kind of funny because it was my understanding the majority didn't marry.
minnie

Milwaukee, WI

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#11
Jul 9, 2009
 
the black community is truly f****d

“It's Good being Me!”

Since: Apr 09

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#12
Jul 9, 2009
 
I'm glad it's not just women on this forum disputing what was said. lol, put a smile on my face that's for sure!

Since: Nov 07

Urban Decay

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#13
Jul 9, 2009
 

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Dentsun4228 wrote:
Too many reasons why brothers don't need to be getting married. First of all, the divorce rate is upwards of 55%. That doesn't include the marriages that are basically over and the partners no longer love each other or want to be together, but they're sticking it out for the children, or they're afraid to be alone or just feel that divorce is against their religion. If it did, the divorce stats would be more like 85%. Basically, marriage is destined to fail. And only a miracle can save your ass when the shid hits the fan.
Because, who are the casualties when divorce strikes? The kids, the man. In that order. As a black man you will have NO rights in divorce court but to stfu and PAY. Pay 'til you can't afford to pay anymore.. and even then the judge will order a bigger payment when she takes your ass back to court saying she needs more money. If you're a father you still have to pay, but if you had just shacked up, you wouldn't have to worry about lawyers and spousal support and all that when you guys break up. Besides, you'd see your kids more often and not have to endure the social stigma of divorce...and you'd still be able to hit that pu$$y whenever the mood strikes unless she takes up with another guy...but what man is going to seriously want a woman with 2, 3 kids?
The government tends to penalize married people more than couples who shack up, so you'd probably derive more benefits as an unmarried couple anyway.
By not getting married you'll probably have less children, so you would be able to better pursue your goals and success in life. You'd have less on your plate and more time to think, create and be happy. You wouldn't see your potential diminished by the burden and demands of children and an ex-wife.
90+ percent of the married brothers are with bw, but you don't have to be married to love your mate and be devoted to her. You could provide some other token of your love and committment. And by not marrying her, you'd save yourself from being pubicly raped when things don't work out. If she doesn't understand where you're coming from when you say you just want to live together, if she insists on getting married, just tell her to "fk off!" then leave. You'd be saving your own life.
So says the bitter WHITE man whose only mission is to cause division among black people.
kenyan Brother

Saint Cloud, MN

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#14
Jul 9, 2009
 

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DAMN! White folks just f%#ked up africa with all those damn borders! Now they are telling us not to get married?! LOL! They can go to hell.(not all whites just the racist ones).
Malcolm

United States

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#15
Jul 9, 2009
 

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I can understand why any man in America not just Black men would be apprehensive about marriage, but I would never advice a Black man to not get married, just use caution.

First have fear of God before you do it, and than get a rightly guided woman, and your not going to find that in a club. Get some pre-marital counseling, and have a pre-nuptial agreement.

Also the best women usually come from stable families themselves, ask her about her father, and how she feels about him. If she can't find one positive thing to say about him than it won't take her long to find something wrong with you, and that will be what she uses to build her case for divorce.

As I stated from the beginning the man has to be right first, otherwise he has no one to blame but himself when things go wrong.

Most of us who have marital problems have them because we have never seen a good marriage in action, and as African Americans we were never brought to this country to be married and have families in the first place, but many of us formed them anyway, and did well.

Level 1

Since: Nov 08

Brooklyn,NY

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#16
Jul 9, 2009
 
Half Women Half Amazing wrote:
This is wrong on so many levels. The reason why the divorice rate is so high isn't b/c men & women shouldn't get married. It's b/c people marry @the wrong time & for the wrong reasons. Marriage is more than a paper. It is the ONLY relationship that you can have w/a person that's MEANT to be life long. Anything else is really unstable. There are benefits to being married. The problem is men get these benefits THEN they don't want to get married. It's not a woman's place (that is not your wife) to be intimate w/you, to be supportive of you, to have your back & to GIVE BIRTH to your children. Marriage is a beautiful & it's way better than playing house. If you love the person you're w/the ultimate action of committment is marriage. PEOPLE STOP LETTING HOODRATZ & THUGS TAINT YOUR IMAGE OF LOVE & MARRIAGE.
HOW exactly is marriage better than shacking up? Just because you as a female can't bleed your ex-BOYFRIEND dry for spousal support/retirement and other benefits when y'all fall out of love and break up? Yeah, I can see how that would suck for you.

Sure. It's US MEN who get benefits out of marriage. How about all the horny women who basically DEMAND sex and WANT a man to be supportive and intimate? It's not OUR job as men to give them all that, is it? I mean, I can have all the great sex I want without ransoming my financial future and my children's future...what do I REALLY need a WIFE for? Women today don't even do the wifely things anymore. They don't COOK, they don't like to do domestic chores and when it comes to kids they don't even take the same kind of care to teach them right like the older generation used to do. Their excuse? They're too stressed. Well, my mom worked a full-time job and came home and cooked and cared for me and my siblings and she never complained. No wonder she and my father have had a happy marriage for going on 27 years now.

These days women have this culture of victimization with social workers and advocates etc, grooming them, encouraging them to take their ex-husband to the cleaners. Which only makes for a more acrimonious divorce and more problems for the kids.

“R U Still Down?”

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Since: Feb 09

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#17
Jul 9, 2009
 
Dentsun4228 wrote:
<quoted text>HOW exactly is marriage better than shacking up? Just because you as a female can't bleed your ex-BOYFRIEND dry for spousal support/retirement and other benefits when y'all fall out of love and break up? Yeah, I can see how that would suck for you.
Sure. It's US MEN who get benefits out of marriage. How about all the horny women who basically DEMAND sex and WANT a man to be supportive and intimate? It's not OUR job as men to give them all that, is it? I mean, I can have all the great sex I want without ransoming my financial future and my children's future...what do I REALLY need a WIFE for? Women today don't even do the wifely things anymore. They don't COOK, they don't like to do domestic chores and when it comes to kids they don't even take the same kind of care to teach them right like the older generation used to do. Their excuse? They're too stressed. Well, my mom worked a full-time job and came home and cooked and cared for me and my siblings and she never complained. No wonder she and my father have had a happy marriage for going on 27 years now.
These days women have this culture of victimization with social workers and advocates etc, grooming them, encouraging them to take their ex-husband to the cleaners. Which only makes for a more acrimonious divorce and more problems for the kids.
MAN U ARE NOT BLACK. STOP CAUSING PROBLEMS.

Since: Nov 08

Toronto, Canada

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#18
Jul 9, 2009
 

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Sorry for you. I'm definitely looking to get married and build a family.

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Jul 9, 2009
 

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Spank Me wrote:
<quoted text>
To each his own.
If you don't want to get married then that's just you.
Men think about marriage just as much a woman do.
Marriage is a natural desire.
Life's to short to waste it alone.
I'm sure before america existed marriages lasted much longer. So what is it that american society is doing wrong, or do we allow society and statistics rule our lives.
There are too many men out there that does not want to live their life being lonely or not committed to one woman, through marriage.
You're pathetic. You want to marry so you're not all alone in your old age. That's not a good reason to marry. You can do the same thing with a mate. The problem is marriage itself is an outdated notion. Men simply aren't monogamous and women have their share of problems in that area too. Lifelong commitments that last 40, 50 years may not even be natural.

All I can say is: If someone told you that your chances of survival after drinking a mystery potion was only 45%, you'd try and put as much distance as possible between it and yourself.
puttingholesinha ppiness

United States

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#21
Jul 9, 2009
 
Dentsun4228 wrote:
Too many reasons why brothers don't need to be getting married. First of all, the divorce rate is upwards of 55%. That doesn't include the marriages that are basically over and the partners no longer love each other or want to be together, but they're sticking it out for the children, or they're afraid to be alone or just feel that divorce is against their religion. If it did, the divorce stats would be more like 85%. Basically, marriage is destined to fail. And only a miracle can save your ass when the shid hits the fan.
Because, who are the casualties when divorce strikes? The kids, the man. In that order. As a black man you will have NO rights in divorce court but to stfu and PAY. Pay 'til you can't afford to pay anymore.. and even then the judge will order a bigger payment when she takes your ass back to court saying she needs more money. If you're a father you still have to pay, but if you had just shacked up, you wouldn't have to worry about lawyers and spousal support and all that when you guys break up. Besides, you'd see your kids more often and not have to endure the social stigma of divorce...and you'd still be able to hit that pu$$y whenever the mood strikes unless she takes up with another guy...but what man is going to seriously want a woman with 2, 3 kids?
The government tends to penalize married people more than couples who shack up, so you'd probably derive more benefits as an unmarried couple anyway.
By not getting married you'll probably have less children, so you would be able to better pursue your goals and success in life. You'd have less on your plate and more time to think, create and be happy. You wouldn't see your potential diminished by the burden and demands of children and an ex-wife.
90+ percent of the married brothers are with bw, but you don't have to be married to love your mate and be devoted to her. You could provide some other token of your love and committment. And by not marrying her, you'd save yourself from being pubicly raped when things don't work out. If she doesn't understand where you're coming from when you say you just want to live together, if she insists on getting married, just tell her to "fk off!" then leave. You'd be saving your own life.
encouraging not getting married is probably going to do very little to solve the problems. I think it'll make things worse. Never encourage any man or group of men to not commit.That's already hard enough with ALL men black and white lol. Don't give them another reason to keep having babies and leaving them. All its likely going to do is enhance/promote player mentality

“It's Good being Me!”

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#22
Jul 9, 2009
 
Dentsun4228 wrote:
<quoted text>HOW exactly is marriage better than shacking up? Just because you as a female can't bleed your ex-BOYFRIEND dry for spousal support/retirement and other benefits when y'all fall out of love and break up? Yeah, I can see how that would suck for you.
Sure. It's US MEN who get benefits out of marriage. How about all the horny women who basically DEMAND sex and WANT a man to be supportive and intimate? It's not OUR job as men to give them all that, is it? I mean, I can have all the great sex I want without ransoming my financial future and my children's future...what do I REALLY need a WIFE for? Women today don't even do the wifely things anymore. They don't COOK, they don't like to do domestic chores and when it comes to kids they don't even take the same kind of care to teach them right like the older generation used to do. Their excuse? They're too stressed. Well, my mom worked a full-time job and came home and cooked and cared for me and my siblings and she never complained. No wonder she and my father have had a happy marriage for going on 27 years now.
These days women have this culture of victimization with social workers and advocates etc, grooming them, encouraging them to take their ex-husband to the cleaners. Which only makes for a more acrimonious divorce and more problems for the kids.
Sounds to me you've been dealing w/the wrong kinds of women & they've made you look @marriage in a negative light. I do not believe anyone, man or woman, should waste their time, energy, body, mind & spirit on someone who does not want to show the symbol (marriage) of a life long committed relationship. Every woman is not a gold digger & every man does not have gold for a woman to dig. It's a partnership. If you have money & that's important to you (rightfully so) then you should date in your social bracket. It makes sense. That way no one would be taking you to "the cleaners". Behind every good man is a good woman. And woman appreciate a good man. Someone you marry should be compatible that way you don't have to worry about someone "getting over" on you. Dealing w/trifling women who used you does not draw the conclusion that marriage is bad & benefits the woman only. All that means is you need to learn how to pick them better. You don't know when a woman is using you? You can't tell when a woman is completely sincere in the way she feels about you? When the 2 of you are really connected? No lies, no drama or secrets? This my friend is a beautiful thing. For women...& men.
MzCalifgirl

United States

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#23
Jul 9, 2009
 

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Dentsun4228 wrote:
Too many reasons why brothers don't need to be getting married. First of all, the divorce rate is upwards of 55%. That doesn't include the marriages that are basically over and the partners no longer love each other or want to be together, but they're sticking it out for the children, or they're afraid to be alone or just feel that divorce is against their religion. If it did, the divorce stats would be more like 85%. Basically, marriage is destined to fail. And only a miracle can save your ass when the shid hits the fan.
Because, who are the casualties when divorce strikes? The kids, the man. In that order. As a black man you will have NO rights in divorce court but to stfu and PAY. Pay 'til you can't afford to pay anymore.. and even then the judge will order a bigger payment when she takes your ass back to court saying she needs more money. If you're a father you still have to pay, but if you had just shacked up, you wouldn't have to worry about lawyers and spousal support and all that when you guys break up. Besides, you'd see your kids more often and not have to endure the social stigma of divorce...and you'd still be able to hit that pu$$y whenever the mood strikes unless she takes up with another guy...but what man is going to seriously want a woman with 2, 3 kids?
The government tends to penalize married people more than couples who shack up, so you'd probably derive more benefits as an unmarried couple anyway.
By not getting married you'll probably have less children, so you would be able to better pursue your goals and success in life. You'd have less on your plate and more time to think, create and be happy. You wouldn't see your potential diminished by the burden and demands of children and an ex-wife.
90+ percent of the married brothers are with bw, but you don't have to be married to love your mate and be devoted to her. You could provide some other token of your love and committment. And by not marrying her, you'd save yourself from being pubicly raped when things don't work out. If she doesn't understand where you're coming from when you say you just want to live together, if she insists on getting married, just tell her to "fk off!" then leave. You'd be saving your own life.
If you really are a Black man...please stay single. And become celibate.

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