I hate people who tell stories like this. Yes its great that your mother was smart enough to realize she made a mistake and turned her life around. The problem I have with this topic is that you know good and damn well that the majority of black women who have OOW kids at young ages don't bounce back from that. Alot of them end up on welfare,raise their kids poorly and put all the blame on black men. Black women Picking bad men and having kids OOW is destroying the Black community. Its just as destructive as thugs selling drugs and shooting people other black people. I believe that the whole Idea of black women having kids OOW needs to be shamed. The reason why there are so many black women with OOW kids is because it isnt shamed. Black women need to raise the bar and pick better men. This isnt a thug vs nice guy argument its a smart women vs dumb women argument. Too many women are having sex with bad men who are not husband/father material. It don't take a genious to notice that alot of black women are picking bad men over good men. You don't have to be a thug to be a bad man.(even tho we all know alot of black women get knocked up by thugs) I believe that if Black women YOUNG black women only fucked with responsible educated young black men ONLY black men as a whole would have no choice but to drop all of their bullshit. not saying all black men are on bullshit but their bullshit would no longer be acceptable. Nothing will change untill black women raise the bar in the men they choose. I can't tell a loser black man to get his act together when he can still pull any black women he wants. He will tell me "So what if I don't have a decent job or my own place? Black women STILL on my dick!" I have noticed alot of black women SAY they want a strong educated black man but will settle for a man who ain't about shit because she finds him sexy.I always say that people can always be saved, but only if they WANT to.
My mother was also a young single black mother at the age of 19, and she got pregnant by a no good man. But instead of letting this stop her, she learned from her mistake and got her shit together. She got two jobs, and went to college full time. And paid for her college, might I add. She graduated with a masters. Married a wonderful black man, who fathered her child, and she is now a personal trainer that own her own business (25 years later). Also my mom lives in a million dollar neighborhood, and has three daughters--in addition to her son. I'm in college. And my younger sister goes to Harvard. My youngest sister gets a 4.0 and is still in highschool.
What I'm trying to say, is that she too was apart of that 70% at one point, and people told her she would never make it, that she was pathetic, etc. And these same people can't even compare to her, because her husband makes 600, G's a year, and she has her own business.
Anyone can overcome an obstacle. My mom did. And I think if more people realized this, then so much good would come. I applaud your post troppix, and more people need to reachout to these young people and tell them that they can still do GOOD for themselves even in their position--instead of demeaning these people and bashing them.
A young single black mother, is not a bad person, nor is she pathetic. She made a bad decision and can still be saved. We don't always make the perfect decisions, but it doesn't make us bad people, or pathetic. We all have room to grow and always can change and be saved. I wish more people thought along these lines. And more so I wish more people who are so bitter by this issue, can come up with solutions for this problem instead of bitching and complaining about it.
#43 May 25, 2010
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