Black Women: Would you ever have a Bi...

Black Women: Would you ever have a Biracial child?

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Since: Oct 07

New York, NY

#1 Dec 7, 2008
I was thinking about this which is odd because i dont want kids and I'm like only 18 lol Anyway I have a white bf and I kind of slipped up and told him I dont think I 'd want a mixed race child. The reasons are numerous but I want to hear other peoples reasoning behind whether or not they care about this...
Tim John

United States

#2 Dec 7, 2008
evilbunnyme08 wrote:
I was thinking about this which is odd because i dont want kids and I'm like only 18 lol Anyway I have a white bf and I kind of slipped up and told him I dont think I 'd want a mixed race child. The reasons are numerous but I want to hear other peoples reasoning behind whether or not they care about this...
We don't care, clown, so run away.

“This was so much FUN!”

Since: Sep 08

Thomasville, GA

#3 Dec 7, 2008
I would have a black child or a biracial child. it depends on whomever I choose to marry and Im completely fine with having either. A child is a child and all children are gifts.

Out of curiosity, what are your reasons for not wanting a biracial child?
Jamerican mami

Selma, NC

#4 Dec 7, 2008
no i would not: by choice. i mean i dont know who i will fall inlove with later on but for right now i am not interested in interracial dating, having biracial children (although i wouldnt mind raising a child who is not of my race but is in need of love), and i dont even date men who are lighter than me simply because i appreciate my dark complexion (but thats a whole different story)...basically no. i do not want to have a biracial child. i dont want my kids to have to worry about fitting in and having to be confused/rejected. bottom line im not with it period.
Jamerican mami

Selma, NC

#5 Dec 7, 2008
oh and im 19 btw kind of young to think about children anyhow lol.

Since: Oct 07

New York, NY

#6 Dec 7, 2008
Kristen_08 wrote:
I would have a black child or a biracial child. it depends on whomever I choose to marry and Im completely fine with having either. A child is a child and all children are gifts.
Out of curiosity, what are your reasons for not wanting a biracial child?
its hard to explain but here it goes...

i guess i grew up with racial problems and a negative self image. ive always had diverse groups of friends even though i grew up in predominantly white schools but (thanks to my mother) i used to think black people were the least attractive group of people especially really dark skinned people. i think a lot of girls aspire to be like their mothers if their moms pay a proper role in their lives. i love my mom but she is flawed like anyone else; she still thinks "mixed or non black people" are more attractive than black people, generally not always though. She had to deal with straightening my hair when i was younger (shit load of hair) and kind of always made comments like "marry a man outside your race so you wont have to deal with your kids hair". So as much as i rebel against her i think small things like this built up into a negative image of black people. she is very pale for a black person and people always assumed she was mixed or whatever so i would cover up in the sun in the summer or beg her for bleaching cream so i could be a couple shades lighter even though im already pretty light. i started calling myself an "oreo" and associating negative things with black and good with white. you know the routine. I didnt break out of this until later on in high school as i became more educated about race, history, society, etc. i did a 360 - i dont really straighten my hair anymore and i actually converted my mom as well and i dont have those negative images in my mind anymore. apparently im more "afrocentric" and "pro-black" npw lol (not my words) I still have yet to date a black guy though.

Okay im rambling - basically i would want to raise my child to be proud of African and black heritage in general and to teach them about racial oppression in the world. I would think it would be difficult to do that with a mixed child. dont misunderstand me - if youre part black youre still black in my opinion. however ive seen a couple mixed people with extreme identitity crisis. i saw this one documentary where a black woman was the mother and her little boy said that he thought he was white. it would kill me if my child came up to me and said that! how are you supposed to feel as a mother? Also a lot of history is related to white oppression so how would the father feel? Like i would assume he would want to instill his heritage as well. whats the child supposed to think? "well mommy says your people basically fucked hers over..." i just think its so important to raise strong black children (especially girls) and difficult enough to do so in a white dominated society. How much more difficult would it be to deal with a mixed child. I'm black and even i struggled throughout my early years. Not that many people my age that I know of are as "liberated" (can i call it that?) as i am in that sense so its a pretty rare case. a lot of people dont even work stuff out like this until much later in life. it just seems very complicated lol

Since: Oct 07

New York, NY

#7 Dec 7, 2008
Jamerican mami wrote:
no i would not: by choice. i mean i dont know who i will fall inlove with later on but for right now i am not interested in interracial dating, having biracial children (although i wouldnt mind raising a child who is not of my race but is in need of love), and i dont even date men who are lighter than me simply because i appreciate my dark complexion (but thats a whole different story)...basically no. i do not want to have a biracial child. i dont want my kids to have to worry about fitting in and having to be confused/rejected. bottom line im not with it period.
omg stuff that makes me so mad. like youre entitled to your own opinion but it just reminds me of guys who dont date dark skinned girls. this colorism is ridiculous. perpetuated racism within a race. its crazy.

“This was so much FUN!”

Since: Sep 08

Thomasville, GA

#8 Dec 7, 2008
wow. Well its always your choice. D whatever makes you happy and if thats your choice....go for it!

Level 1

Since: May 07

Dodge City, KS

#9 Dec 7, 2008
sure

“Nani O Mitendayo????”

Level 1

Since: Jul 07

Brooklyn

#10 Dec 7, 2008
I do. And I love my son dearly.

THICKLKSNICKERS

“ " SKIN TIGHT "”

Level 2

Since: Jun 08

SOMEWHERE

#11 Dec 7, 2008
WHY NOT! THEY ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!
Jamerican mami

Selma, NC

#12 Dec 7, 2008
evilbunny pls. lol you're dating a white guy but you dont want a mixed child, you contradict yourself but yet you want to accuse me of colorism? pls. i answered your quetion. that was all you needed to be concerned about. i simpy gave you reasons why i prefered not to have a biracial/lightskinned child. i know what they go through and i dont want my children to got through that....get over it.

Since: Oct 07

New York, NY

#13 Dec 7, 2008
Jamerican mami wrote:
evilbunny pls. lol you're dating a white guy but you dont want a mixed child, you contradict yourself but yet you want to accuse me of colorism? pls. i answered your quetion. that was all you needed to be concerned about. i simpy gave you reasons why i prefered not to have a biracial/lightskinned child. i know what they go through and i dont want my children to got through that....get over it.
lol...attitude. like i said youre entitled to your opinion.

dating is far from poppin out babies honey.

Since: Oct 07

New York, NY

#14 Dec 7, 2008
MyVeinsRanDry wrote:
I do. And I love my son dearly.
aw your baby is so cute!
Jorja

Brisbane, Australia

#15 Dec 7, 2008
evilbunnyme08 wrote:
I was thinking about this which is odd because i dont want kids and I'm like only 18 lol Anyway I have a white bf and I kind of slipped up and told him I dont think I 'd want a mixed race child. The reasons are numerous but I want to hear other peoples reasoning behind whether or not they care about this...
lol i am exactly the opposite to you because i personally dont mind what race my kid is so i guess yes i would raise a biracial child as my own but hell no could i ever date a white man let alone have a child with one *shudder* and with that attitude of mine it probably wouldnt be a good idea bringing up a kid who is half white hahahahahaha so yeah....

Since: Nov 08

AOL

#16 Dec 7, 2008
evilbunnyme08 wrote:
<quoted text>
lol...attitude. like i said youre entitled to your opinion.
dating is far from poppin out babies honey.
And here I thought dating was solely the beginning stages of a relationship, with the possibility of future marriage... which'd most likely end in those two having a baby together.

Hmmm...

If I were your BF, I'd break it off right there if you told me you do not want interracial kids.

Here's a serious suggestion for future reference: Don't bother dating someone you never plan on having a baby with.

“This was so much FUN!”

Since: Sep 08

Thomasville, GA

#17 Dec 7, 2008
Jorja wrote:
<quoted text>
lol i am exactly the opposite to you because i personally dont mind what race my kid is so i guess yes i would raise a biracial child as my own but hell no could i ever date a white man let alone have a child with one *shudder* and with that attitude of mine it probably wouldnt be a good idea bringing up a kid who is half white hahahahahaha so yeah....
c/s

Since: Oct 07

New York, NY

#18 Dec 7, 2008
Northalius wrote:
<quoted text>
And here I thought dating was solely the beginning stages of a relationship, with the possibility of future marriage... which'd most likely end in those two having a baby together.
Hmmm...
If I were your BF, I'd break it off right there if you told me you do not want interracial kids.
Here's a serious suggestion for future reference: Don't bother dating someone you never plan on having a baby with.
okay am i the only person in the universe who doesnt intend on marrying or having kids with every person i date? im 18 for christ sake! its a HUGE turn off if some guy is like "so yeah are we gonna end up preggo or what?" lol my god what is the world coming to...

hopefully i wont get married though. im crazy liberal and i dont really believe in marriage. im just talking about having kids in a stable relationship. im sure as hell not thinking about that until like my mid thirties *gag* too much life to live you know?

however...if i were to get married (and eventually divorced) like the unfortunate majority of this country...then yes it probably would be to someone like my bf. hes pretty much everything i want in a man. we're in love :]

he better not break up with me over this! ill kill him :]

Since: Oct 07

New York, NY

#19 Dec 7, 2008
Jorja wrote:
<quoted text>
lol i am exactly the opposite to you because i personally dont mind what race my kid is so i guess yes i would raise a biracial child as my own but hell no could i ever date a white man let alone have a child with one *shudder* and with that attitude of mine it probably wouldnt be a good idea bringing up a kid who is half white hahahahahaha so yeah....
lol i guess not. why only white guys? are you just not attracted to them?

Since: Nov 08

AOL

#20 Dec 8, 2008
evilbunnyme08 wrote:
<quoted text>
okay am i the only person in the universe who doesnt intend on marrying or having kids with every person i date? im 18 for christ sake! its a HUGE turn off if some guy is like "so yeah are we gonna end up preggo or what?" lol my god what is the world coming to...
hopefully i wont get married though. im crazy liberal and i dont really believe in marriage. im just talking about having kids in a stable relationship. im sure as hell not thinking about that until like my mid thirties *gag* too much life to live you know?
however...if i were to get married (and eventually divorced) like the unfortunate majority of this country...then yes it probably would be to someone like my bf. hes pretty much everything i want in a man. we're in love :]
he better not break up with me over this! ill kill him :]
If you were truly in LOVE with your BF, then you'd LOVE to have a kid with him, eventually, down the road. FACT.

I don't think you're actually in LOVE with your BF. Sorry. ;)

But I hear so many kiddies today say they're in love with their mate. And yes, they do get married too soon, and do not know what they're getting into. They're still too immature to marry someone, thus they're too immature to be dating someone in a serious relationship, as well. They should find another hobby and put the relationships to the opposite gender on HOLD until they mature a lot more.

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