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Picture of Bridge Over Roberts Rd. posted in the Justice, IL gallery
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Yes Yes We Can
on Jun 27 '11
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Yes Yes We Can wrote: The Justice Enquirer June 24, 2011VILLAGE OF JUSTICE SEEKING INVESTORS TOBUILD BRIDGE OVER ROBERTS RD.Justice Il.- Due to the high unemployment rate in Illinois (8.9%) the Mayor decided to implement his own Job Stimulus Plan of Justice (Not related to the Coalition Party of Justice October Plan) to keep on track with President Obamas much touted but failed job stimulus plan. When asked what prompted him to pursue this giant undertaking, he said, as his eyes began to moisten,I lob dis kontry.The Justice Bridge Over Troubled Waters as it will be known, though its span will be shorter than its proposed name, will be situated on Roberts Rd. between 79th St. and 87th St. Its total span still undetermined, but it is rumored to be between a towing company on the east and a hot dog eatery on the west.The JBOTW will also contain a reflecting area with benches so residents can admire its modern architecture while enjoying their favorite cup of java. An ex-trustee will donate the landscaping for the bridge garden. In addition, the highlight of this project, is an area that will be set aside for tourists and residents alike, where they can purchase Justice historical artifacts such as back room deal documents if any, and to view the ships where many of village's politicians, as is their custom, jump to and from during the election season. In addition, the plan includes a history room that will display portraits of our historical yet forgettable and laughable past and present administrators. Last and not least, you will be able to purchase bricks, yes folks bricks with your name on them, or that of your neighbor if you so wish, to hurl at cars from atop the bridge containing your favorite village politician during parades during Centennial festivities. As of today, prices for the bricks have not yet been determined. However, it was suggested, that any proceeds be donated to the Mayors favorite charity, The Village of Justice Public Works and Building Department.The Mayor also promised to use residents from the village for the JSPJ program. However, resident qualifications are quite stringent, as they must own white vans with ladder racks on top, but he added that any color would be acceptable after the white vans run out. He also said that to gain support from his friends in Springfield, he has printed petitions that will be distributed at Committee meetings, Board meetings, Centennial meetings, Village Hall meetings and if Justice Park District Commissioners allow him, the petitions will also be distributed at Park District meetings to the three people that attend.The mayor commented, that compared to his other famous projections:The Famous Big Box Store Plan on 88th Ave. two years ago, and the The Famous Truck Stop of earlier this year,(Neither to be confused with the Famous Burrito),this would be a piece of cake, and it would place him in his niche in the Justice history books along with many Justice luminaries who have long ago faded away.When asked about the project, a Justice resident and close friend of the Mayor, who asked to remain anonymous, applauded the Mayor and said,This is the only Mayor in the history of this village, who has been pro-active, and that through hard work, perseverance, and vision can bring our villages economy back to prosperity no later than 2030, and solve the serious flooding problem on Roberts Rd. all at the same time. And yes I will vote for him again, he said. And while smiling and with a wink of an eye, he added providing he does not jump ship.The Mayor also said that the project is shovel ready, and is said to commence as soon as the village gets funding from Springfield in 2029.
simon and garfunkle wrote: <quoted text>this is one of the best posts I ever read.
the graduate wrote: <quoted text>Kris and the coalition is doing to the town what Benjamin Braddock was doing to Mrs Robinson in the motel room.v
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